


High School Never Ends

by robinasnyder



Series: All the President's Children [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-05-14 05:18:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 57,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5730853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robinasnyder/pseuds/robinasnyder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ben Organa-Solo is the son of the first female President of the United States, and an Ex-Drug Smuggler. His Uncle is one of the highest ranking openly gay and married military officers. His adopted grandparents come from a political dynasty to rival the Kennedys. And his Grandparents include both a member of European royalty, and the most prolific domestic terrorist in US history. Also, he'd rather be called Kylo Ren.</p><p>It's official: Ren's life is a soap opera. Only he never signed up to act in this nonsense and he doesn't even get paid for all the pictures that get taken of him. </p><p>So when a new friend Hux, the son of a highly conservative Tea Party Senator, offers Ren a chance to screw over his parents, Ren jumps at the chance. That's how Ren begins fake dating a boy he quickly realizes he actually does really like. </p><p>Ren's life is a soap opera.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It’s one thing to be just going through his awkward teenaged years. It was something else to be 15, starting high school and the son of the first woman President of the United States.

Leia Organa was practically legend before she got involved in politics herself. She and her brother were the children of one of the country’s most prolific domestic terrorists, and a member of European royalty. She was raised by the Organa family, a political dynasty to rival the Kennedys. DC expected that their adopted daughter would make a meteoric rise, but she suddenly disappeared from her job working in Senator Organa’s office.

She reappeared years later from a successful sting operation that put her own father in prison, and had her return with her well unknown twin brother, a Kansas farmer who would go on to have a promising military career himself. She also returned married to a known drug smuggler Han Solo. The Organa family pulled strings to get Solo a pardon due to part in the capture of Anakin Skywalker. 

Everyone knew this. It was the weight that hung around Ren’s neck when he started his new school. 

Ren didn’t want to be an Organa. He didn’t want to be a Solo. He barely wanted to be a Skywalker, since his grandfather was the only person in their family Ren could actually stand, and he only got to see him once a month through glass. He’d picked his own name, Kylo Ren. And that was what he wanted to be called.

But his name on the private school roll said ‘Ben Organa-Solo’, like his wishes didn’t even matter. He grit his teeth and tried not to lash out. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been asking to be called Kylo Ren since he was 13. He really couldn’t get teachers to call him Kylo, though. Most would compromise at ‘Ren’, at least. 

He just hated the first day of school. He had to correct every teacher at the beginning of each year, and every substitute afterwards. And then sometimes they would never, ever call him what he wanted to be called. 

Ren did his best to be quiet over breakfast while baby Rey chattered excitedly about going to the 2nd grade. Ren rolled his eyes, but secretly he was happy for her. She was in her last year at her Primary school and was about to graduate to the Elementary school. He hadn’t gone through the Empire School system. The Empire School covered children from Preschool age until they graduated and headed to university. Rey had been five years old when their mother became President. She’d started her Kindergarten year half way through and no one thought it was weird. 

Ren had been thirteen and was suddenly thrust into a junior high where everyone had formed their friend groups long ago. He was also the President’s kid, and the grandson of one of the most hated men in the nation’s history. 

Kylo Ren didn’t have friends. The other kids either wanted something from him or they wanted to make fun of him. 

The High School started at grade 10. He had three years left and then he could go disappear into the university system. 

“It’s gonna be the best year ever, Kylo,” Rey chattered when they get into the limo. Once they’re away from the prying eyes of everyone Ren wraps his arm around her and pulled her close, causing her to giggle. She called him what he wanted to be called. 

“You’re gonna have a great time,” Ren said. He tickled her sides, making Rey laugh loudly. Her three little ponybuns bounced as she attempted to squirm out of his arm. Ren’s long hair feel into his eyes and he had to flick his head back to get the brown fluff out of his eyes. 

Rey turned around and started trying to tickle him. Ren dropped back and moaned like he was pain. 

“Oh, oh no! You got me! You got me!” he called as if he was in some kind of death throes.

“Okay you too,” the secret service agent called. “Buckle up.” 

They both grumbled and pulled apart. Rey scooted over to her side of the back seat and Ren sat up. They pulled on their seatbelts. Rey started to chatter again about what she planned to do when she got to school. She was still old enough to be excited about new boxes of crayons and new notebooks with Elsa on them. 

Ren listened to her, but he watched the DC traffic go by. He knew that his year was going to be just as bad as the last two had been, but he also couldn’t help but feel a little lifted by Rey’s chatter. He knew hope was useless, but he still felt a little lighter when he got out of the limo and walked Rey to her classroom than he had when he’d gotten in the car.

Ren had promised Rey and his parents that he’d walk his little sister to her classroom. It was how he convinced them not to come. It was always a circus when they came to school. The open house had been a nightmare. He didn’t wanted to deal with that stress again so soon. 

Rey’s primary was an older building on the Empire Campus which had been refurbished. The outside looked like Harvard and the inside looked like the Starship Enterprise. It was a slick, beautiful white and blue and Ren couldn’t imagine how anyone could keep a place like that so clean. 

Ren held Rey’s hand as she skipped to her ponybuns bounced. She looked adorable in her little girl blazer and skirt. Ren felt terribly fond of Rey in that moment. He didn’t really remember ever being that happy, but he was so grateful that it was a possibility for her. 

“Okay Rey, you be a good girl. I’ll come get you once School’s over,” Ren said when he got Rey to her classroom. 

“Bye Kylo!” she called and bolted into class like she hadn’t even heard what he’d said. 

Ren sighed and turned to head toward his own school. It was further down the campus, and he was early. That was fine. It didn’t matter. It just meant he could get there and claim a seat in the back before anyone else could. Everyone knew the first day was important for picking your seat. Once you sat there it was yours for the rest of the semester.

Ren hunkered down when he had to walk to Empire High. He was in the standard black blazer and grey pressed slacks. They wore red ties with this ensemble, which Ren always felt looked satanic. The first time he said it he’d gotten detention. His detention and “Satan worship” ended up splashed across the gossip rags the next day. Proof that he couldn’t trust anyone at school.

His father had bought him the little upside down black cross he now had on the key chain of his book bag. It was one of the few times in the past years Ren could remember feeling fond of his father. Screw what they thought. Screw whatever kid had snapped the picture and sold the story. Screw all of them.

That had inspired his second key chain, the Linkin Park triangle logo. So what if they hadn’t been cool since the early 2000s? 

His grandfather said it was important to be yourself, no matter what anyone else said. And he would know, after all. 

Ren trudged into Empire High. Unlike Rey’s school, the inside and outside looked new and sleek. The school made an effort to always look modern. They were always doing some kind of renovation toward that end, anyway. 

As soon as Ren walked through the doors and down toward the Sophomore hall he began to have flashbacks to the open house. His mother had actually bothered to come down for open house and walk him around to meet all his teachers. 

Ren shut his eyes and took a deep breath, willing the images away. He wasn’t willing to think about that humiliation right now. He needed to be all together to face the rest of the first day. 

At least his Uncle Chewie worked here. If Ren got punched like last year, he was pretty certain Uncle Chewie would punch whoever did it. 

That thought lifted Ren’s spirits enough as he entered his homeroom. He went and dropped into what would be his seat from now on. He picked one in the back in the middle. He still wanted to see the black board. Not that he’d need it for homeroom, but he was going to be consistent about where he sat this year.

There weren’t many students around yet, but they were beginning to trickle in. Ren wasn’t the only Empire High student who had to drop off younger siblings, after all. Waiting for the day to start was dull, especially when the most Ren could do was sit around and listen to other kids greet each other and brag about their summers.

He normally would pull on his headphones, but he mother insisted for Ren to attempt to follow the rules for the first month of school. That was when they were the strictest. After that they seemed to loosen up a lot. And Uncle Chewie had backed up that opinion. 

Ren had mean to pick up a book, but he’d forgotten. He wouldn’t forget for Tuesday. He really was bored. He considered going to his new locker, but he decided against it. He didn’t have any reason to yet and he didn’t want to lose his seat.  
They’d been assigned lockers already and anyone who had gone to the open house already got their locker key. Anyone who hadn’t could get their key when they arrived in homeroom. Once Homeroom started they’d get whatever paperwork couldn’t be handed out during open house, which was always a surprising amount. 

Ren’s eyes ran over the room’s occupants. He knew all of them from the previous years. He could sit in the back and be left alone, at least.

He’d been told that they got strangers whenever the schools changed. Not many, but a few. The first one walked in and Ren didn’t have to ask to know who she was. 

Phasma had been the kind of exploding teeny bopper that popped up sometimes. She sang and acted for the Disney channel and had been known for her adorable blonde curls and pig tails. Ren had watched her show growing up. He’d even had a tiny crush on her. She was as close as he’d ever gotten to being attracted to a girl before or since. 

Then everything crashed for her. Ren read the gossip rags about as much as any girl in his school did. He knew about her Drew Berrymore-esq lifestyle, the drugs and parties from a young age. He knew about her having to skip a year of school for rehab. Last he’d heard her grandparents had custody and she had been put in military school. 

He guessed that her mother got custody back, because Phasma was at Empire. He didn’t know if she wanted to be back at military school, but he knew she was wearing the male uniform, dog tags instead of a tie, and her hair famous long blonde curls were chopped off in a very male military style cut. 

He decided instantly that he liked her. Crush and her Disney character aside, Ren liked anyone who could wear their ‘Fuck You’s on their chest.

She checked the roster for her key and frowned. She looked back out at the lockers and then back at the roster. She reached into the box and drug out an envelope. 

“Hey, that’s not your key,” one of the students behind her said. 

“I’m 6”3. I’m not taking a bottom locker,” she said flatly. 

Ren smirked. He really, really liked her. 

She walked past the other students, with a click-click-click. That was when Ren realized she wasn’t wearing uniform shoes for the boys or girls. She was wearing black stilettoes. 

“Can you even walk in those things?” Ren asked when she passed him. When Phasma whipped around and glared at him Ren wished, not for the first time, that he was better and controlling his mouth. 

Phasma’s glare came with a wide, toothy grin. “You want to see the damage I’ve done to my feet learning to walk in seven inch heels before my boobs grew in?” 

“Nope,” Ren said quickly. He got the mental image of what he’d seen from ballerinas who’d taken their shoes off. He knew well enough that he did not want to see. 

“Good,” Phasma said, and then dropped into the seat next to his. 

Ren didn’t know if it was to piss him off, or if he’d said something she liked. He wasn’t certain which idea made him feel more nervous. 

“So, are you really a Satanist?” she asked. Well, that was a surprise, but not exactly surprising. He was definitely was well known as Phasma, though certainly not as well publicized.

“I don’t know,” Ren said. “Are you really a drug addict?” 

“Want to see my one year DAA chip?” she asked. She turned her camo book bag around and showed him the little metal hanging off of her bag. It had a hole punched into it, but he recognized it from others he’d seen. DC had a way of turning perfectly sane people into addicts and alcoholics. 

“That’s cool,” he said. “That’s hard work.” 

“Of course it is,” she said primly and hugged her book bag to her chest. 

Ren pulled his bag off the floor and turned it around so she could see his little upside down cross. 

“So it’s true?” she asked. 

“Nah, but it’s good for show,” Ren said. 

Phasma laughed. “Don’t believe everything you read online.” 

Something heavy eased in Ren’s chest. Yes, maybe he would have a better year. “You know that you’re going to get in trouble if you keep dressing like that.” 

“I know,” she said. “I want to go back to my school.” Her voice was flat. Her hands clenched into fists. 

Yeah, her mom probably did get custody back. She was pissed, but Ren knew from that tone that she absolutely did not want to talk about it. 

“Is it nice there?” he asked. 

“It’s tough, but I like that,” she said with a sharp smile. Ren was pretty certain she could rip someone’s throat out when she smiled like that. 

“Ah, good,” Ren said a bit weakly. He glanced at the door in time to do a double take. 

A tall redhead walked in. His hair was slicked back and combed down like he had walked out of some movie about Nazis. Ren didn’t recognize him. It was odd too, because Ren always recognized the kids of politicians and the wealthy, even the dignitary’s kids. There were only so many of them. But Ren didn’t know this one. 

“The hell is that?” Ren muttered under his breath. 

“Brendol Hux Jr,” Phasma said dryly. “He was filling out paperwork the same day I was,” she added. 

“Ah, that asshole,” Ren said. He knew about Brendol Hux Sr. The man was a huge ass. His own party had dumped him, but he’d come back as an independent. He was so conservative that he probably really thought that women belonged back in the kitchen. The crazy militia groups absolutely adored him.

“Yeah. Hux!” she shouted across the room. “Grab my key for me, will you?” she called. 

Hux’s head shot up. His eyes, cold and very, very blue, fixed on Phasma and the narrowed. Ren wondered for a second if the kid was going to tell her fuck off. To Ren’s surprise he did grab Phasma’s key and walked over to them. 

Ren couldn’t help but admire the way he walked. It wasn’t exactly stiff, but it kind of reminded Ren of his uncle. Very military, very fluid. Ren guessed that was what happened when you got raised by an army man. Hux’s uniform was perfectly pressed and fitted and his shoes fucking shone.

“Let me guess, you have mine?” Hux asked dryly. He dropped into the seat in front of Phasma. He tucked his bag in the basket under his desk and then turned around to look at Phasma. Even Hux’s bag was the one sold in the school store. Everything about his appearance was completely up to code. He could be on the pamphlet for Empire High School. 

“Of course I do,” she said. “I’m taller than you,” she said. 

“What part of six feet seems short to you?” Hux asked. 

“What part of 6”3 seems shorter than 6”0 to you?” Phasma asked dryly. 

Hux shrugged. “Maybe it would be easier if you weren’t wearing heels quiet that high.” 

“Maybe it would be easier if they didn’t insist on putting half the lockers on the floor,” Ren said. He sort of surprised himself at saying it. It seemed to surprise Hux too, who turned to look at him like he was just noticing him for the first time. 

Ren wasn’t surprised. He wasn’t a true stand out like Phasma or even Hux. Yeah, he was tall, but he was also just like any other teen, just with a big nose. 

“You look familiar, who are you?” Hux demanded. 

“The President’s son,” Phasma said. “Ben Organa-Solo” 

Ren felt the annoyed tick in his face. “Don’t call me that,” he said between his teeth. 

“We’re not going to bow down and call you Mr President’s Son,” Hux said. It was his turn to make use of the dry tone. Ren shoved down a wish to punch Hux in his perfect little face. 

“Kylo Ren,” he said. “That’s what I want to be called.” 

They both stared at him for a minute. Finally Phasma shrugged and sat back in her seat. “It’s not any weirder than our names.” 

“Agreed,” Hux said. “You prefer Kylo?” 

Ren let out a breath. “Yes, I do.”

“I prefer Hux,” Hux said. He extended his hand. 

Ren found himself looking at the hand for a minute. It occurred to him that it was very strange for him to be touching anyone at all, especially another student. He stared for probably too long before he reached out and accepted Hux’s hand and shook it. Luckily Hux nor Phasma said anything about it.

“Good to meet you,” Ren said.

“You too,” Hux said. He suddenly smiled wickedly. “Want to cause a scandal?” 

“Always,” Ren said. “You have a plan?” 

“Not yet,” Hux said. “I’ll tell you when I have an idea.” 

Ren was about to say something, but Hux turned around. Like some sixth sense he seemed to know that the teacher was about to stand up and address the class. Because he turned around only seconds before their homeroom teacher came in. 

Ren tuned out most of the teacher’s talk. It was just about paperwork that had to be filled out and rules they had to adhere to. The speech had been the same since he’d arrived at this school system. He knew it without having to listen. He accepted the papers he was given and put them into one of his folders before dropping said folder back into his bag. 

He couldn’t stop himself from glancing at Phasma and Hux. Ren knew what it was like to be the outsider. He still was. He wished he had the gall to dress like Phasma or to go all the way perfect like Hux seemed to. And yet both of them seemed to get along. And they both spoke to him. Ren didn’t know if it was a fluke or not, but he wasn’t going to let himself really hope.

* * *

Ren was surprised at lunch that first day when Phasma had grabbed Ren’s arm and dragged him over to a table where Hux was already seated. He didn’t see anyone else around them. He didn’t even know how Phasma found him. He didn’t really stand out. 

Well, Ren thought he didn’t. People knew what he looked like. They knew his floppy brown hair and his too big nose. They knew to leave him alone. While he tried to disappear he knew people watched him all the time. His family drama sold papers. His isolation made it online. He had pictures of himself sitting alone at a table at lunch from when he was a kid, all the way up, every year. It was like the world had nothing better to do. 

But he still didn’t think of himself as stand out enough for Phasma to come find him. After all, she was an international pop star, supposedly. As soon as the rest of the class realized who she was, they had been buzzing around her nonstop. She seemed like some untouchable god figure. She’d been swept away in a sea of admirers when the bell rung for the next class. 

Hux had been swept away too, but Ren hadn’t thought a lot about it. It was normal for him. He was used to the transient nature of school friendships. He remembered being back at his old schools, when he had people he’d be friends with every year, but as soon as the summer came and they swapped classes that friendships fell away. There was no such thing as friends forever. And at Empire there was barely such a thing as friends. 

Hux wanted to talk to Phasma. Ren had been incidental. 

And then Phasma dragged him over to the table with Hux. Ren didn’t understand it. 

Hux looked as perfectly pressed as someone on a school poster and not one hair was out of place. His clothes didn’t even look lived in. Ren had no clue how that was even possible. 

Phasma threw her arm over Ren’s shoulders, which shocked him out of his thoughts. 

“What?” he asked, wondering if they’d said something and he just hadn’t been listening. 

“Hux worked out an absolutely brilliant plan in history,” Phasma said. 

“How brilliant?” Ren asked, narrowing his eyes a bit. Hux was smirking and Ren found that he both did and did not like that. 

“We should date,” Hux said. 

“Um… what?” Ren asked in a slightly strangled voice. He did his absolute best to not have other people know about his sexuality. Sure, his family knew, and uncle Chewie, but only them. Uncle Luke was the only person who’d guessed, and that’s only because he could finally come out himself recently. 

He didn’t want people to know. He didn’t want to be a headline for this. He didn’t want his first kiss all over the news blogs. 

“I’m gay,” Hux said in a flat tone. “Not that my father would ever accept it, but wouldn’t it be a fucking scandal? The right wing senator’s son dating the president’s boy?” 

“I don’t…” Ren felt his face heat up. Even his ears felt hot. He itched to cover his face. He gripped his hands into fists to keep from doing just that. “What makes you think that I’d want to do this?” 

“You always look so miserable in your pictures. I thought you’d enjoy causing your parents trouble,” Hux said. 

“Yes, but this means everyone is going to think I’m gay too,” Ren said flatly. 

“That’s my part,” Phasma said. “After you two ‘break up’, I’ll date you.” 

Ren blinked. He turned to look at her. She was, without even really trying, the coolest thing to have ever walked through the halls of this school. And he absolutely was not. It would give him an out. He could always say that he was trying to piss of his parents, which would be true. And then who would be that surprised if he did come out later? 

“Come on,” Hux said, leaning forward. “Don’t you want to be in control of your own press for once?” 

He did. He really did. Looking at Phasma made Ren realize that was why she’d agreed to this to begin with. They had no control. The people they were related to meant they were all in the spotlight to some degree. And none of them had any real control. They still had to do what their families wanted. None of them were happy with that. They all wanted a chance to have some say in what people say about them. 

“Okay,” Ren said. “You have a deal.” 

“Great,” Phasma said with a wide, toothy smile. “So Hux, how do we begin?” 

“Ren will have the first move,” Hux said. “We have to build a story.” 

“The President’s loner son gets friends,” Ren said. He could already see the blog headlines. He started to unpack his lunch. “My mother will be gleeful to have you both over.” 

“So what, we get a dinner invite or something?” Phasma asked. 

“I don’t see why not,” Ren said. “Are your parents going to want to come too?” 

Hux snorted. “Of course, are you kidding?” 

“Mom will love it, but only if I tell her,” Phasma said, a dark look in her eyes. 

“I’ll take care of it,” Ren said. Then he hesitated. He was used to being used. “Do you want your families to come over?” 

“They don’t have to,” Hux said. “But I think it will be all the more crushing for my father to have dined at the White House and then it turns out I’m dating the President’s son.” 

Ren nodded. Yes, Hux was using him. And Phasma too. But Ren was using them too. This was a mutual understanding. He could live with that. It was honest anyway. 

“I’ll make it happen,” Ren promised. 

“Excellent,” Hux said. 

“How does Wednesday sound?” Ren asked. It was only two days away, and it was family dinner night. His mother was assured to be there. It would be better that way. 

“And what about the rest?” Phasma asked. 

“We can work that out in my room,” Ren said. “No extra ears that way.” 

“Sounds good, Kylo,” Hux said. 

Ren felt like something in his breast suddenly became warm. Hux said his name, remembered what Ren wanted to be called and didn’t say it in a mocking way. Hux said it the way Rey said it: like it was Ren’s name. 

Maybe Rey had been right after all. Maybe this year would be good.


	2. Chapter 2

Ren’s family ate dinner at 6 pm every evening, there about. Sometimes there would be some event or something would happen to interrupt that schedule, but dinner was generally the one unchanging things in their lives. Ren found it comforting. 

The family dining room and living quarters were above the areas that tourists could walk through. Most of the house looked very old, historical, and untouchable. At least the touring areas looked that way. Downstairs was the Old Family Dining Room. Some old presidential family had eaten there. It was yellow and filled with historical tables, chairs, and other furniture and paintings. They rarely even stepped food in that room. 

The actual living area had some level of personalization. Ren had asked for metal and stone dining tables when his opinion had been asked. It was one of the things that they actually took his advice on. It did look pretty cool with the dark wood furniture and the dark green wallpaper. The windows let in light in the morning and they could look out at the gardens. It was a familiar sight to Ren now. It had been so strange when they’d first moved in. 

Their house in Connecticut did sit on a lot of land, but it wasn’t nearly as big. The Organa house was bigger, in terms of room they could actually live in. Ren still missed Connecticut. They would go back to Thanksgiving sometimes. Rey didn’t like it. She’d never grown up there. Connecticut didn’t really feel like home anymore. The White House certainly wasn’t home. It was just the place they lived for the moment.  
The dining room most resembled their home back in Connecticut. That was probably why Ren preferred that room. He did his homework there a lot. Also, Rey was less likely to bother him in the dining room than she would when he was in his own room.

Dinner was almost, almost like before. Ren’s mother hadn’t ever been good at making dinner back in Connecticut. She was actually a little better at it now as President. She just didn’t get a lot of other time with them. 

His mother tried to eat dinner with them every night. She maybe made it a full dinner a fourth of the time, and showed up at all half of the time. It meant that when Ren wanted to ask something he needed to ask almost as soon as his mother came in and sat down. 

His mother had just turned 40 a few months back. She kept herself up well. Ren was used to hearing about how appearances were important; especially for women in the spotlight. If he read one more article about how Mrs President was letting herself go, he was going to punch a reporter. None of them saw the effort she put into wearing interesting and well-fitting skirt suits, or how she took her time with her make-up. None of them knew the effort she put into learning to braid her own hair perfectly just to have some independence in getting dressed in the morning.

That evening her hair was braided up around her head and into a bun. It kept it out of her way while she worked. She’d opted for a forest green suit. Her pumps were already kicked off under the table. Ren knew because she did that every time she sat down for dinner. Also, because one of her shoes and gotten flung over to his side of the table and he could tap it with his foot. 

He was seated across from her this evening, with Rey of his right and his father on his left. His father was in jeans and a tee shirt. He’d at least made the effort to wash. He liked to work on his crappy car he couldn’t even drive when heh ad a free day. Even with the shower, he had some grease still behind his ear. Ren wasn’t going to say anything. His father could embarrass himself all on his own. 

Ren knew there were good reasons to criticize his mother. But appearance wasn’t one of them. He could easily criticize his father for his appearance. As far as Ren was concerned, his father’s face was starting to look craggy. But his dad still topped the sexiest men in America lists all the time. Meanwhile his mother’s pictures would appear under titles like “Doesn’t She Look Tired?” and “Botched Botox?” 

Ren probably shouldn’t spend so much time online, reading comment sections. 

He had spent most of the day trying to work up the nerve to ask. He couldn’t imagine that his parents would say no. But he hadn’t asked to have friends over in years. Not since they moved here anyway. He’d spent most of his homework time working out what he would say, and going over the script in his mind. 

His mother was smiling tiredly. That she was still in her work clothes, told Ren that she expected to have to run right back to the office. She reached out and grabbed a roll and began to butter it. Now or never. 

“So, tell me about your first day,” his mother said, smiling wider. Ren wondered if it was for show, just for Rey to give her a cheerful audience for the tales of her day’s adventures. 

“I need to ask something,” Ren said quickly before Rey could started to talk. She’d fill the entire dinner with her chatter. Normally Ren was okay with that. It made his silence less noticeable. 

His parents and sister both seemed to freeze for a moment and then all of them turned to look at him with twin expressions of shock. Okay, maybe his silence wasn’t as unnoticeable as he thought. 

“What is it, Ben?” his mother asked with a kindly tone and very pointed smile. 

“Um, yeah,” Ren said, dropping his eyes. Damn, he didn’t think this would be that hard. 

It occurred to him that he didn’t know when it had become so hard to ask his parents for things. It was probably back when they’d first moved and he’d asked his dad if he could go back to Connecticut. His father had laughed him off like it was a joke. Ren knew his dad thought he’d been joking. 

Ren couldn’t really remember asking for things after that. Well, he asked for things like clothes and MP3 players, but not stuff that really mattered. 

“Come on son, out with it,” his father said. He was trying to sound kindly, Ren knew. But really his father just sounded grumpy. 

“So… um, I met some new people today… students,” Ren started. 

The reactions came quickly. Rey smiled wildly and rather smugly for a girl of her age. His father relaxed perceptibly and Ren wondered what his father had been afraid he was going to ask for. His mother’s smile shifted from encouraging to and honest relief.

“You met some new people,” his mother said. Her tone was so encouraging that Ren wanted to smack her. Not that he could get away with it. But he didn’t want his mother to pity him. Clearly, she did. 

“Yeah,” he said, trying to seem calmer than he felt. He took a deep breath and made his face relax. “Like… new friends, and I was wondering if I could invite them to dinner?” he did his best to add a questioning and even placating tone to the end of his sentences. 

His father laughed. 

“What?” Ren said through his teeth. 

“You already told them they could come,” his father said. Ren flushed. 

“How did you know that?” Ren asked. 

“You used to do it when you were younger,” his mother said. “And it’s fine. We’ll get them invitations.” Invitations made it easier for the Secret Service to be certain that the right people were coming in. 

“Yeah,” Ren said. He wracked his brain a bit, but he didn’t actually remember a time when he’d invited friends over without telling his parents. It was unsettling. He couldn’t help but wonder what else he’d forgotten. He didn’t even realize he had those gaps until he poked at them now. 

He realized that the conversation had moved on without him; that his family had taken his thoughts as his normal return to silence. He quickly cut in, stepping on whatever Rey had been saying, causing her to pout. He’d make it up to her later. 

“It’s just,” he said quickly. His family looked at him again. Ren swallowed and pressed on. “You know, I’m not certain their parents will be happy just dumping them here and-”

“We’ll invite them too,” his mother said. She had an odd look on her face. It took Ren a moment to realize it was pride. She was proud of him. “It’s good of you to think of what their families would think.” 

Ren ducked his head and did go back to his silence on his own this time. Rey went back to her story, but Ren wasn’t listening. He was busy planning. He remembered being ten and handing out invitations to his birthday party to everyone in his class. The memory almost felt hollow. It was a life time ago. 

He wished he was that boy again. That boy had been happy. Maybe. Maybe he’d been happy. Ren couldn’t be certain if what he remembered was real, or just his current unhappiness coloring his past. He didn’t used to overthink back then. That was a good enough reason to wish it was five years back. 

After dinner he went to talk to the Secret Service detail. They’d need the information for the invitations, and to tell them who would be coming. Akbar raised an eyebrow when he heard who Ren was having over. His parents would know who their son had invited to dinner before the night was over. But at least Ren didn’t have to tell them himself. 

He went to Rey’s room and let her drag him into playing princesses. Rey made him play Hans again. She insisted that Hans could be good one day. Ren didn’t think so, but he didn’t argue with her. He just played with her until the nannies came to take Rey for bath time. Then Ren ducked into his own room and went to bed early. 

His nerves had killed his energy level. He could wake up early and shower if he needed to. But he was very done with that day, even though it hadn’t been nearly as bad as he thought.

* * *

Kylo got them actual physical invitations the next day at school. He’d said that it would make admittance easier. Hux didn’t care about that. He cared that it would make his story easier to believe. While he’d never show it outwardly he was inwardly buzzing with excitement all day long. 

The invitation was practically burning a hole in his book bag. When he arrived home he even considered giving the invitation to his mother, who he found lounging on the living room sofa, knitting baby clothes for her church group. 

He considered it, but then decided against it. It would anger his father to not receive it directly. Unfortunately he stood there too long and his mother noticed his hesitation. 

“Is there something you need Brendol?” she asked. She smiled sweetly. 

His mother was a proper southern lady. She’d fit perfectly in the Virginia suburb they’d lived in until recently. The months when his father moved but Hux and his mother hadn’t yet moved had been a blessing. It was just their house and school work and his mother’s garden. 

Lady Hux, her first name was Lady, set her knitting aside and sat up. His mother was at least twenty years younger than his father, and the red in her hair was still vibrant. But there were beginning to be lines in the corner of her eyes and mouth from age and the lack of smiles when her husband was around. 

“No,” Hux said. He thought for a moment about sitting down next to her and letting her talk about knitting to him while she worked. He’d done that a lot before the move. He’d done it a lot when he’d been a child, but his father didn’t approve. 

His mother’s small southern charm was absolutely swallowed by the massive modern nature of the new apartment. It wasn’t even that Hux hated the apartment. It looked like the kind of place he would dream about living in on his own. It was sleek new wood floors, black stone counter tops and many high windows all over, looking out over the other old buildings around it. That his father had picked it for them all to live in made Hux hate it. His father couldn’t let him have anything for his own enjoyment. 

It wasn’t like they’d actually needed to move. The commute wasn’t so bad that they had to take a bunch of money and buy a new apartment in DC, and certainly not one so expensive. It was his father’s way of declaring that he was going to be there for more than just one term. 

“What are you knitting?” Hux asked. 

“Baby booties,” his mother said with a little smile. “For Audrey’s new baby.” Her smile turned sad. “Turns out they aren’t needed, but I figured I’d finish and send them back to Washington Street.” She mentioned their old church, one that wasn’t so modern as the new one his father insisted they not attend, one where his mother’s skills would be appreciated. 

Hux felt a knot of tight anger begin to bubble in his gut. He bit his bottom lip, the only concession he made to showing any outward anger. 

“Is father in his study?” Hux asked. 

“Of course, Brendol,” his mother said. She looked a little sad. Then she dropper her voice to a near whisper. “Come give me a kiss before you go.” 

Brendol stepped close and bent down. He kissed her cheek and then quickly straightened. He turned and strode to his father’s office. He knocked twice, quick, smart wraps on the cheery wood door. 

“Enter,” his father’s deep booming voice called. Hux stepped into the neat room. It was filled with many books, almost none of which Hux’s father had ever read. Hux knew because he did read them. He would often bookmark the books, and wait for his father to find what he’d done. He even wrote ‘Bren was here’ in a couple one Sunday when he’d been feeling particularly angry. His father still hadn’t found them. 

His father turned around. Brendol Hux Sr was a tall, broad man. He dwarfed Hux both in height and width. Hux was still growing, though. He was certain he’d catch up to his father in height, though he was more like his mother in his physicality. He was just wiry. It was something his father had always sneered at. 

In truth, Hux thought his father looked like Colonel Mustard, except for being red haired instead of white haired, and he didn’t tend to grow such outrageous side beard.

“What is it, boy?” his father demanded sharply. 

“I’ve been invited to dinner tomorrow night,” Hux said. “I wanted to know if I could attend.” 

His father didn’t look happy. “Who?”

“Ben Organa-Solo,” Hux said. The name did not flow easily off his tongue. Kylo Ren came easily, especially because Kylo lit up like Christmas every time Hux called him what he wanted to be called. 

His father snorted. “Oh, right, sure.” He clearly did not believe his son. 

Hux pulled out the invitation from the front pocket. It was on a crisp cream paper, with the official seal of the President sealing the envelope. “You and mother are invited as well.” 

He held out his arm to full length, refusing to get any closer to his father than he had to. Even though it pissed his father off to have to extend his own arm all the way out to reach whatever Hux handed him, Hux still knew better than to get too close. 

His father snatched the envelope from his son’s hands. He turned it over and his eyes got a little wide when he saw the seal. He still ripped the envelope open and pulled out the card inside. 

Ren had told him and Phasma what would be on the card. Ren had sounded disgusted as he described the polite language. Hux knew it was addressed to Brendol Hux Jr and the parents/guardians of. He could see the shock in his father’s eyes when he read the first line. 

Hux didn’t smirk. He knew better than to show any emotion, but he still felt a kind of dark giddiness. 

“You got an invitation to have dinner with the President’s son?” his father asked, something akin to disbelief in his voice. There was resentment too. This was exactly what Hux had wanted. 

“Yes,” Hux said. “I was told you were invited as well, Father,” he said, doing his best to sound innocent. 

His father narrowed his eyes. “I should throw this in the trash,” he said, turning back to the card. Brendol Hux Sr didn’t have a reason to learn to school his features as well as his son did. Hux could see the want in his father’s eyes. He wanted influence. A private dinner at the White House would look good. Whenever President Organa compromised, his father could spin it like he’d put in the work to have her do that because his son was friends with her son, and they talked. 

“I thought it might be helpful,” Hux said, making his eyes just a bit wider. 

“Help how?” his father snorted. 

“Ben talks about home a lot. He might slip something that could be of use,” Hux said. 

His father’s bushy eyebrows rose. He was interested. That was exactly what he wanted. 

“That still doesn’t explain how this helps,” his father said. But his resolve was flagging. 

“If she thinks of you as a fellow parent instead of a Senator, she could underestimate you and be surprised when you stand against her,” Hux said. 

Hux had won. His father turned back to his desk and grabbed his phone, beginning to open his calendar. He would clear anything in his schedule to make it work. 

“Dismissed,” his father said. 

Hux turned on his heel and walked out. He shut the door quietly behind him. He didn’t allow himself to smirk, but he wanted to. The first step of his plan was a success. He strode to his room to do his homework. He’d gloat in his own mind later, probably when he went to bed and had the time to think about such delicious victories.

* * *

Ren was nervous about dinner. Both Phasma and Hux had assured him at school that they were coming and that their parents were coming. Phasma apologized ahead of time about her mother. The disgusted way she’s spoke about her mother made Ren nervous. 

The way Hux asked about dress code made Ren nervous too. Who had a dress code for a family dinner? He assured them both that it was informal. That his little sister would probably wear one of her Disney Princess tee shirts and a very loud colored skirt, and that both he and his father would wear jeans. His mother may wear a dress, but when Hux frowned, Ren assured him that it was just because his mother found them easier to pull on than pants.

That Hux asked if Rey had a Princess and the Frog shirt, and if she could wear it made Ren even more nervous. 

He really did not need his little sister getting harassed by a racist. 

He asked Rey to wear her Tiana and Naveen shirt anyway. His mother would physically throw Brendol Hux Sr out herself if he started anything with Rey. 

Ren went to wait by the entrance. All tour groups had to be out when the family was in residence. Ren was glad for it. He didn’t want strangers underfoot when he had people coming over. There was a security check point, but these people were guests and not strangers, so the security wouldn’t be as stringent. 

Still, Ren waited anxiously while the Secret Service got through checking over his guests. The first person he saw come through was Phasma. She was wearing very tight green and black tartan pants, a peach peplum shirt, the black stilettos she wore to school every day, and a large piece of turquoise statement jewelry. Her make-up looked ready for a runway show, nothing like what she wore for school. She looked like a rock star. Ren felt instantly out of place in all black tee shirt, jeans and converses.

Phasma grinned and strode over to him, all long legs and grace. How had he ever missed how tall she was? She threw her arms around him and hugged him. Ren felt some of the wind get knocked out of him, but his arms still went right around her. He hadn’t been hugged by people outside his family in a long time, but hugs were sacred and they were always returned. 

“Is this your friend, Fanny?” a woman’s voice cut through. It was pleasant, more pleasant than what Ren imagined from Phasma’s mother. Phasma pulled away and stepped to the side. That was when Ren got a chance to actually see the woman, a handsome older woman in a nice plain black wrap dress and black heels. Her white hair was piled on top of her hair. She was smiling just a little.

“Granny, this is Ren,” Phasma said. Ren wanted to hug her again. He’d told her and Hux that his parents didn’t call him anything but Ben, and occasionally Benny. ‘Ren’ was actually a good compromise, but he hadn’t expected his co-conspirators to call him anything but Ben when around his parents. 

“I thought your mother was coming,” Ren said. 

“My daughter is indisposed,” Phasma’s grandmother said snippily. Ren wondered if that meant the woman was passed out in a pool of her own vomit. A look at Phasma’s hard expression told him that was probably exactly where she was. 

“Thank you both for coming,” Ren said. “You’re a bit early.” 

“Fashionably late is a myth,” Phasma said like she’d heard those words a million times. She caught Ren’s eyes and glanced at her grandmother. He smirked. He had a feeling Phasma heard a lot of stuff like that. 

“Ben,” his father’s voice cut right through the good mood. The smile dropped right off Ren’s face. He turned to look at his father who was striding down the hall, Rey swinging off his arm. His father scooped her up with each step and swung her out a little, before setting her down. Rey’s laughter quickly filled the hall. 

Well, Ren could live with that. 

“You sneak around fast,” his father said, equal parts amused and proud. “Hello there, we’re the welcoming committee.” 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir,” Phasma’s grandmother said. 

“Han’s fine,” his father said, pulling on one of his well-known flirty smiles. Ren rolled his eyes. Everyone inside the family knew Han Solo couldn’t actually flirt his way out of a wet paper bag, but he had a nice smile and so the women of America swooned. 

“Andrea,” Phasma’s grandmother said. “And this is my granddaughter, Fanny.” 

“Phasma,” Phasma said. “Gran and Pa are the only ones who can all me Fanny.” 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Han said. He the hands of both women before he looked back at Ren. “Say kid, didn’t you used to have a poster of this girl up in your room?” 

Phasma absolutely cackled. 

“Thanks dad,” Ren said, blushing bright red. “I liked _Stormy Chance_ , okay?” He said to Phasma, mentioning her old show. 

“It’s fine,” she said, still giggling a bit. She tossed her arm over his shoulder easily. “I did too. It was fun. The other stuff was bull-” she cut herself off, looking down at Rey who was staring up at her with wide eyes. 

“Thanks,” Han said, scooping Rey up off the floor and cradling her to his chest. “She’s probably heard worse, but we don’t say adult words around little people.” 

“Nope,” Rey agreed. 

Ren grinned. Rey was a good girl. She was tough like the entire family was, but she was also so much sunshine. 

“I’ll try to keep my adult words to a minimum,” Phasma promised. 

“Good,” Han said. “Welcome!” He called. 

Ren and Phasma both turned to see an entire family of gingers walk into the foyer. Ren recognized Brendol Hux Sr instantly. The man was something of a cartoon, and he was one of the people that got made fun of most by the adults in the family. Ren could think of no less than twenty jokes about the man off the top of his head. 

The man looked even harder and harsher in real life. He was in a suit, though he’d left the tie at home, which Ren took as his concession to casual. His wife was wearing a lovely blue dress. Not a hair was out of place and her face was made up perfectly. 

Hux stood slightly behind his parents. Ren was reminded again of the Hitler Youth. His hair was just as neat as normal. His white button up had to be starched to hell and back to look so perfect, and he was wearing khakis. Khakis and brown dress shoes. 

Ren felt like a real slob.

“Mr Solo,” Hux Sr said. He extended his hand. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” 

“Similar,” Ren’s father said. He shook Hux Sr’s hand in about the laziest way possible. Ren bit his bottom lip to keep from smirking. 

Hux Sr’s eyebrow twitched in annoyance, like the sloppy, floppy haired man in jeans was insulting him by his mere presence. His dad was actually wearing a button up, like he cared. And as far as Ren was concerned, Hux Sr could use to be offended more often. 

“We appreciate the invitation,” Hux Sr continued. 

“Eh, no problem,” Ren’s father said. “We know with Ben we’re much more comfortable getting a chance to meet the parents before we let Ben hang out at a friend’s house.” 

“Of course,” Hux Sr’s wife, Lady Hux, said with an easy smile. “I’m sure our son would be safe here anyway.” 

“Rey certainly has the most heavily guarded slumber parties in history,” Ren’s father said with an easy smile. 

Lady Hux opened her mouth like she meant to speak again, but Hux Sr shot his wife a look, and she closed her mouth instantly and just slipped to an easy smile. 

“Yeah,” Ren’s father said. “Andrea, these are the Huxs, Huxs, this Andrea, and I think dinner ought to be ready, if you’ll follow me.”


	3. Chapter 3

“That was literally the most uncomfortable dinner I’ve ever been to,” Ren declared once he was able to herd Phasma and Hux back to his bedroom and get his door shut and locked. 

He moved past the two of them and threw himself down on his black and gold comforter. He didn’t watch them stare at the ridiculous opulence that was his bedroom. It was far too big to be of use. He had a selection of model airplanes, and posters from different bands that were popular in the early 2000s (Linkin Park and Evanescence and My Chemical Romance). He had crap to fill up his room, but even with the overly modern furniture and the dark throw rugs, and the ridiculous art he’d printed out of his grandfather back when Anakin Skywalker had still be a folk hero, none of that could cover the pompous bullshit that was a bedroom in the White House. 

He knew Phasma and Hux would judge his room. It would just fit with that evening. Sometimes adults acted worse than children. They were still downstairs, playing out the politeness game and choking on dinner conversation in the dining room.

As soon as he and Phasma had finished eating (Hux ate significantly slower) Ren had asked if they could be excused. His mother had barely looked from her toe to toe argument with Hux Sr to ask Ren to take Rey with him. Ren was so grateful to have escaped the cold war at the dining table that he hadn’t even complained about having to cart his little sister around in front of his ‘friends’. He’d dropped Rey off with her nannies for bath time, and then led his companions to his room. 

“I’ve been to worse,” Phasma said, flopping down next to Ren.

“As have I,” Hux said, taking Ren’s overly modern black leather desk chair. “What the hell are you wearing by the way?”

“Comfortable clothes,” Ren said with more than a touch of disgust. Hux had been sitting there during dinner, looking all pristine and perfect, with his perfect table manners and absolute politeness. Ren’s mother had looked like she wanted to adopt Hux. 

“These are comfortable,” Hux said flatly, his tone biting. “You look like a hobo.” 

Phasma snorted in Ren’s ear. She rolled over and put her arm around Ren, keeping him from getting up to do… something. He didn’t know what, but the idea of punching Hux seemed pretty appealing. 

“I gotta say, Hux, you dress like a Mormon,” Phasma said. Ren grinned. Phasma was more like a friend than just a co-conspirator. At least Ren wished that he could be friends with Phasma. She seemed like the type of person he’d want as a friend. If he had friends.

Hux’s ears turned about as red as his hair. “And what, precisely, is the point of what you’re wearing?” 

“I never get to dress up anymore,” Phasma pouted. “Ren, do you still have my poster?” 

“No,” Ren lied. He’d taken it down when Phasma first agreed to come. 

“Can we get down to business?” Hux asked. 

“Yeah,” Ren said. He pressed into Phasma’s arms a little more. Hux really did have a punchable face. “What is this grand plan of yours anyway?” 

“Well,” Hux said, sitting up straighter. Spines weren’t supposed to be that straight. There was something very unnatural about the way Hux sat. “To begin with I need to come over to your house a lot more often.” 

“Shouldn’t be a problem,” Ren said sarcastically. He didn’t really want Hux around his mother. He was starting to wonder if this was such a good idea after all. Ren didn’t need another reason to remind his mother he was a disappointment.

“I’ll try to run interference so my mom won’t try to show up at an event,” Phasma said, the thrum of her voice vibrating through Ren’s back, since Phasma was now practically laying on top of him. Her words cut through his angry thoughts about Hux. 

“I don’t think we’re going to do another parents dinner,” Ren said. Nope. Next time Ren invited one of his mother’s political opponents to dinner, Ren was going to find a reason to not attend said dinner. 

“I agree,” Hux said. “If the adults wants to talk they can come up with ways to do so on their own.” 

“I can’t imagine they’re going to want to,” Phasma said with a snort. 

“I’m certain your grandmother would enjoy being flirted with again,” Ren said, rolling his eyes. “Ow.” 

Phasma had grabbed the flesh on his side and viciously twisted. 

“Well, it’s nice to know that you got zero of your father’s charm,” Phasma said. “Or your mothers. I want to be her when I grow up.” 

“Yeah, then maybe I don’t want to know you when you grow up,” Ren said. He really thought about throwing her off, but decided that he didn’t actually want to lose Phasma’s warm weight. “She’s a nightmare to live with when she’s actually around.” 

“Enough,” Hux said quietly. Both Ren and Phasma shut up. “That’s enough on that for the moment. We need to plan.” 

“Well, then just tell us what you think should happen,” Ren snapped out, feeling a tad disgusted with the both of them and the whole venture at the moment. 

“Phasma and I will come one… two, three more times, and then you’ll just invite me,” Hux said. “Including once for an overnight visit.” 

“Ah, the insinuated hanky panky,” Phasma said, grinning broadly. Ren had to practically twist his head around to see her face, but he was glad he did. Phasma had a great smile 

“Crudely put, yes,” Hux said. Ren snorted. That wasn’t crudely put at all. Hux glared at him and pressed on. “After that we can plan how we’ll first be seen.” 

“Well, it shouldn’t be at school,” Phasma said. “Although you two should seem visibly closer. Like walk each other to class and stuff.” 

“That seems reasonable,” Ren said. “Are we going to do something sappy like go out on an ice cream date? Because I should mention that I don’t go out very often.” Really, it was never. The Secret Service loved it. He went to school and home. He was easy to keep track of. 

“It should definitely be out,” Phasma said. “I say we extend this a little more so I can go with you boys once or twice… and I have got it!” she gasped, sitting bolt upright. 

“Got what?” Hux asked. Ren rolled over a bit so he could actually see Phasma as she spoke, and so he wouldn’t have to see Hux’s annoying face.

“How you two come out. We’ll go someplace together, like to the Zoo or something. I still get trouble enough from the paps, I promise that someone will be there to take my picture. We just line it up so they are trying to get a pic of me, but in the background are you two swapping spit,” she was beaming. “It’s perfect.” 

“Yes, except how is it possible to line up that shot and know they’ll get it?” Hux asked. 

“Oh ye of little faith,” Phasma said. “I promise it can be done. You wouldn’t believe what agents and PR managers can do.” 

“Care to elaborate a little more?” Hux asked, one of his eyebrows twitching in annoyance. 

“I call up my agent and tell him that I know you two are dating and that you two won’t be able to resist kissing. He’ll make certain the picture gets taken. It’ll get my name in the papers too, especially if I’m in the shot. He’ll love it. He’s been worried about losing me as a client anyway.” 

“That’s… vaguely evil,” Ren said, sitting up as well. “No, more than vaguely.” 

“Yeah, but that’s show business. I’m certain there’s a lot I don’t want to know about what goes on in politics,” Phasma said. 

“Well, I’m okay with this plan,” Ren said. He glanced over at Hux. Hux seemed to be deep in thought for a moment. Then he nodded, just once. It was such a harsh movement, like Hux didn’t know how to do anything that wasn’t totally deliberate.

“We should make up a time line,” Hux said. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. Phasma and Ren did the same. 

“I’m going to guess that Hux is pretty well scheduled, what about you, Phasma?” Ren asked. He could be, especially for evenings when his parents had to go off to some event and take a huge Secret Service detail with them. It was easier if he just stayed home those evenings. Rey had been invited to parties at friend’s houses that she’d had to miss due to such evenings. 

“Not so much,” Phasma said. “I used to. I mean, my mom is trying to drag me out to stuff and I can easily sneak out. It’ll give me a good excuse to not go to whatever she wants to me to do.” 

“Do you all have an opening Thursday?” Hux asked. “My dad’s busy that evening. We can probably have a “study group” at my place.” 

“I can do that,” Phasma said. 

“Me too,” Ren said. He plugged it in to the schedule on his phone. It was a family app. His mom generally just blocked ‘black out days’, but Rey of Ren or their father could plug in things they wanted to do and the rest of the family could see. It was good for a family that always forgot things that weren’t written out. 

“How about next week?” Ren asked, looking at his phone. “Parents have an event, but it can be a sleep over night if you don’t mind going directly to school from here.” 

“I can do that,” Hux said. 

“What about the weekend?” Phasma asked. “I doubt either of your parents will condone partying?” 

“Not a chance,” Ren said. 

“My father would actually kill me,” Hux said, not looking up from his phone. 

“Then what about a movie night or something? Friday or Saturday?” Phasma asked. 

“Nah, it’s a black out day,” Ren said. Then he realized they probably didn’t know what that meant. It means something where the entire family can’t do anything but whatever event my mom has planned. We’re out of state until late Saturday.” 

“Sunday?” Phasma asked. 

“No way,” Hux said. “Unless you two want to come with me to youth group.” 

“I would love to,” Phasma said cheerfully. 

“Really?” Hux and Ren asked at the same time. Phasma didn’t strike Ren as particularly religious. 

“It gets me out of the house, I don’t care,” Phasma said. “Come on, Ren, tell me you’re going to be doing anything interesting otherwise?” 

“Well… no,” Ren said, wrinkling his nose. “But that sounds really, really boring.” 

“It doesn’t have to be,” Hux said. Then he actually let out a completely put upon sigh. His tone became a little less harsh, and dare Ren even believe it, almost pleading. “I would rather have you two there. I don’t know any of these people.” 

“Then why are you going?” Phasma asked. 

“To make my mother happy,” Hux said. “It would have been different back in Alexandria.” He sounded very bitter. It was unsettling. It was the most emotion Hux had shown all evening. 

“Moving sucks,” Ren said. 

“Here, here,” Phasma agreed. 

Hux sighed and focused back on his phone. “So, Sunday?” 

“Yes,” Ren said. “I’ll come.” 

“Alright,” Hux said. “I’m free next Friday.” 

“Me too,” Ren said. 

“Movie night?” Phasma asked. 

“Yes,” both Ren and Hux said.

* * *

“Hey, Ben,” his father asked, knocking on his bedroom door. 

“Yeah?” Ren asked. He was trying to stuff his notebooks back into his book bag. His tie wasn’t on straight and he was still half chewing on a piece of toast. He really shouldn’t have slept in so much today. It threw everything off. And to top it off, Rey wanted to go early. 

“Can I talk to you for a minute?” his father asked. 

“Yeah,” Ren said. He had to work from being short with his father. That wouldn’t do and they’d get into an argument. Ren didn’t need to be late to school this early in the year. 

“I saw you updated the schedule,” his father started. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. The family planner was already open. Ren wondered if it was something he’d just noticed that morning or if his mother told his father to have a talk with Ren about it because she was too busy to do it herself. “These are a lot of plans you made.” 

“Yeah,” Ren said. “It was just easier to plan it out now. Hux’s dad is a stickler about schedule, and it’s better to have it written down early.” 

“Don’t you think you maybe should have asked before you agreed to go over to Hux’s house?” His father asked. Ren didn’t have to look at him to know that he was raising one of his eyebrows. That was always the tone his father used when he made that expression. 

“Well I figured I could plan for it and if it was a problem that I could unagree to it,” Ren said. He couldn’t help the short tempered tone that came out. 

“Ben,” his father said in a warning tone.

“Look,” Ren said shortly. He stopped and took a deep breath. When he spoke again it was with a quieter, sadder tone. “I thought you’d just be happy that I made friends this year.” 

There was a moment of silence where neither of them even moved. Ren blushed a bit. He knew how pathetic it sounded. It was terrible how true it was. Phasma and Hux weren’t even really his friends. They were using each other. Users and co-conspirators is what they were. 

Finally his father let out a deep sigh. “Alright, kid. You can schedule, but from now on you have to actually ask us. We have to approve where you’re going. And if you go without telling us, verbally, that you’re going and getting our approval, then you’re in trouble.” 

“So, does that mean I can go to Hux’s tonight?” Ren asked, making his tone hopeful. 

“Yeah, sure,” Han said. “I’ll inform the Secret Service.” 

“Thanks dad,” Ren said, pulling on a smile he didn’t really feel. 

“Yeah, go on and get in the car or you and Rey are going to be late,” his father said, shooing him out. 

“I’m going, I’m going,” Ren said. He hoisted his back onto his bag, shoved the last of his toast into his mouth and headed right out and down toward the limo.

* * *

Getting permission from his mother for the study group hadn’t been hard. She’d agreed with a smile as soon as he asked, especially when Hux told her that Phasma and Kylo would be coming with him to the youth group. 

His father had been the hold out. He’d been the one who’d railed about the President and her feckless husband, messing up the natural order of things by letting the woman be in control. He’d called them godless heathens and cursed their names for letting their children wear such ‘disrespectful’ clothes. 

When Hux asked him about the study group, his father had nearly turned purple with anger. The color only got worse when he realized that Hux had asked his mother first. This was strictly verboten in their household. 

But then his mother said the magic words: “He’s taking the President’s son to Youth with him, Dear. Brendol can convert them. I’m certain of that.” 

Hux was pretty certain his father didn’t give two shits about the Church, but it looked good on his political resume. It would look great to his conservative constituents if Brendol Hux Sr’s son could convert the fallen idol and the White House Whore’s eldest child to the church. 

Hux, if he were a lesser man, would curl his lips into a sneer at the thought. But he didn’t. He kept his face emotionless and his eyes cold, as he always did around his father. 

Thursday afternoon came quickly. Kylo had texted Hux and Phasma to meet him outside of the Primary. Hux wondered if Ren expected to bring his little sister with him. Did Kylo think it was alright to simply order people around and not at least offer the courtesy of informing them beforehand? Kylo didn’t seem to know or care if something could possibly be impolite. He just did what he wanted. Hux burned a little to think of Kylo taking such liberties. 

To be certain it wouldn’t be the worst sin Kylo could commit. Hux’s mother would love having a chance to care for a little girl. She’d always wanted a little girl, but her husband had insisted they stop after one child, especially when Hux was born male. 

Mostly it was stupid. Hux couldn’t imagine how stupid Kylo would have to be to want to expose his little sister to Brendol Hux Sr, especially given the angry look Hux’s father had given her when he’d seen her shirt at dinner the previous evening. The man didn’t have enough control. If Hux had a sister he certainly wouldn’t let his father near her if he could help it. 

Yes, Hux’s father was supposed to be away that day. But he’d seemed all too happy about Kylo and Phasma coming. Hux couldn’t be certain that his father wouldn’t cut out early to come up and revel in the accomplishment of his son attempting to manipulate his new ‘friends’. Hux sent up another prayer that his father would stay away. He didn’t need the embarrassment of his father’s gloating that day.

It didn’t matter. Any way Hux thought about it, it certainly was presumptuous of Kylo to expect that they would cater to his wishes. But then that seemed to be a function of Kylo’s personality, as far as Hux could tell. 

“Stop sulking,” Phasma said. They were standing outside the Primary, at the meeting place Kylo had designated. They’d already been standing there for a good five minutes, children, parents and servants streaming past them. So far they hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Kylo Ren. Hux was very good at staying still while he waited, but, admittedly, he may have allowed himself more than a few sighs of annoyance. 

Phasma, on the other hand, wasn’t good at staying still while waiting. Especially today. She shifted her bag every few minutes, itchy to open it and look inside. They’d gotten their JROTC uniforms that day and Phasma took every opportunity to look into her bag since she’d stuffed the uniform in there. 

“It’s still there. You don’t have to keep checking,” Hux said, refusing to look at her. Her constant twitching was starting to get on his nerves. 

“You’re such a bastard. Just let a girl be happy that her mother hasn’t taken over every part of life.” 

Phasma’s words surprised him a bit. He glanced at her to see her face was flushed and her eyes were sharp. He’d hurt her. That was unexpected. Hux flushed and looked away. He refused to apologize. He grit his teeth and made certain to look in a different direction that wasn’t down. He wasn’t showing shame. He didn’t know show shame. He was just trying to think of a different topic. 

He was saved from that by Kylo, who made some vague shout, causing both Hux and Phasma to look over at him. He was holding Rey’s hand, and her triple buns bounced as she skipped next to her brother. She waved at them and smiled broadly. 

“Hello there sweetheart,” Phasma said, smiling broadly as she spoke. She walked away from Hux and over to Kylo and Rey before she knelt down. 

“Hello Phasma,” Rey said. She pulled away from her big brother and let Phasma scoop her into a hug. Phasma stood up, taking Rey with her. Hux was a little impressed that Phasma could pick her up and be balanced on such high heels. 

“The Limo’s waiting for us,” Kylo said. “Shall we?” 

“Lead the way,” Phasma nodded. 

Kylo led them away from the car line toward a parking lot where a set of Secret Service Agents were waiting for them. They opened the door. Kylo got in, then Phasma and Rey, and finally Hux. 

“Gotta take a detour. We’re going to drop Rey off first and then they’ll take us to Hux’s place,” Kylo said while he put on his seatbelt. 

Hux followed his motions and started to do the same. 

Kylo took his time picking a radio station for them to listen to. Hux was in no way surprised when Radio Disney started blasting through the compartment. Even less so when Rey started singing around. Kylo’s devotion to his sister would be cute if the current teeny bopper didn’t sound so shrill. 

Hux kept that thought to himself, though, because Phasma started to singing along too. 

“You know this song, Phasma?” Rey asked. 

“I gotta support my girls,” Phasma said with a grin. Then her smile turned kind of sad. “You know how rough it can be to have a lot of people take your picture?” 

“Yeah,” Rey said. She sounded sad as well. She was very young to have so much public exposure already. “But Mommy doesn’t let them take too many.” 

“Yes, well, not all of us Disney kids have Mommies who will tell people to stop taking pictures,” Phasma said. 

“That’s sad,” Rey said. 

“Can be,” Phasma agreed. “But a lot of us band together.” 

“That’s better,” Rey said, smiling a little. Phasma smiled back. 

“That’s the plan,” she assured the little girl. 

Hux looked over at Kylo, who was looking just as interested as Rey, but he at least had the good sense to keep his mouth shut. 

The car ride was awkward, at least in Hux’s opinion. Mostly it involved a little girl and a nearly grown woman singing crappy Disney songs at the top of their lungs. Even Kylo hummed along. Hux was glad no one tried to get him to sing along too. He didn’t actually know any of the songs. Disney was not something he was allowed to indulge in. 

They arrived at the White House and Rey hopped out. She waved to her brother and then ran inside, a Secret Service Agent going after her. Once she was gone and the door was shut, Kylo turned off the radio. 

“Thanks for singing with Rey,” Kylo said. He settled back into his seat and the limo took back off. “She really liked it.” 

“Eh, girls have to support each other,” Phasma said with a shrug. 

“Is that something your grandmother says?” Kylo asked with a little smile. 

“Yeah, actually,” Phasma said with a wider grin. “And your little sister’s cute. She’s not at all moody like you. What the hell happened to make you like that?” 

“Empire doesn’t like you if you’re not “just so”. You two must have noticed that,” Kylo said with a scoff. 

“Not really,” Hux said. It seemed the same to him as everywhere else. 

“No way,” Phasma said. “The place is kind of fucked, let’s be honest. If I hadn’t met you two I’d probably have broken some shit so mom would have to send me back to military school.” 

“Really?” Hux said, trying not to sneer. He couldn’t imagine having such a lack of self-control. 

“Not all of us are built like robots,” Phasma snapped. 

“Some of us are able to handle ourselves without throwing a fit,” Hux said, sniffing a bit. 

“Some of us know how to get shit done,” Phasma said. “I know how to get what I want. I have a plan if yours fucks up or gets too boring. Just because I have more than the emotional range of a napkin doesn’t mean I don’t have control.” 

Kylo sniggered. Hux turned a glare on him. He was the one who’d made them wait. He was the one who insisted on a detour without telling them. He was the one who assumed that Hux would just bow to his whims. He was the reason who Hux had been annoyed enough to let his words slip earlier so he upset Phasma. Kylo had no reason to be laughing like he was above this all. He wasn’t better than any of them.

“I’m sorry, does the spoilt prince have something to say?” Hux demanded. 

“What was that?” Kylo asked. He showed his teeth like he was a dog. Pathetic. 

Hux rolled his eyes. “As far as I can tell, you have everything a teenager could dream off, and you spend most of your time moping and asking ‘why me? Why is my life so hard?’ Well guess what, it’s not. You’re just too weak to see how pathetic you are. There’s nothing truly wrong in your life. You just like to pretend so for attention. Just like all the emo trash you seem to enjoy emulating.” 

His acid tongue made him unpopular in his old schools. Normally he tried to keep himself under better control than to lash out like that. Normally he didn’t even use that many words. When he did let loose he tried to be precise and biting. But he was too agitated and too frustrated today. The words just spilled out. He knew he was better than lashing out. 

He assumed Kylo would try and punch him or possibly come out with a litany of his own harsh words. What he didn’t expect was that Kylo didn’t do either of those things. He was silent. What he didn’t like was the way Kylo just looked crushed. Hux was good at finding weak points in people. Normally he was just better at not spilling them out like that.

Hux ‘hhmphed’ and looked out the window so he wouldn’t have to face Kylo’s hurt face. He shouldn’t have said that… but oh well. Kylo needed to learn to deal with harsh words better. He needed a thicker skin if he was going to survive in this world. 

At least that was what Hux told himself as he slipped into silence, ignoring Kylo and Phasma for the rest of the trip.


	4. Chapter 4

He instantly didn’t like the place. Ren wasn’t used to going to church, especially not around kids his own age. The only, only time his mother dragged him into a church anymore was for the Organa Family Christmas, which always ended up in a Catholic Mass. The Organas were Catholic. No one in the Organa-Solo household was Catholic. 

Ren had a vague working understanding of the faith. Wine of blood, bread of body, all the gloriously weird and gross details, and a suffering man hanging gilt from the device of his execution. There’d be something kind of Death Metal about it all, if it weren’t so tedious. 

The Secret Service called ahead and made arrangements with the adults in charge. Technically extra adults weren’t supposed to be there. It was for the Youth. They’d had to come up with some cover to have two Secret Service agents outside and two inside. There would be a couple driving around the block as well, but the ones nearby were in plain clothes. They blended in pretty well when they weren’t surrounded by teenagers. 

As soon as Ren walked into the cheerfully painted Youth Building he felt immediately out of place. Empire was a fairly white school. The majority of Senators and Congressman were white, anyway. As were the majority of the very wealthy. But diplomats came from everywhere. And not every member of the Legislative Branch who had a child was white. Empire was white, but it wasn’t nearly as white as the Youth House of National Memorial. 

Ren realized that the only non-white faces in the room were his Secret Service agents. He glanced back at them, wondering if maybe he could change his mind and go home. After how Hux had been acting the last few days, Ren wasn’t feeling particularly helpful anyway. 

He’d just about decided to go home when he saw Hux striding over to him. Hux really did not fit. He had a fresh pressed white shirt, collar starched to hell and back, and straight black slacks. He looked like a Mormon spy more than he looked like a Youth. 

“Do you ever wear jeans?” Ren asked. Ren had gone with black skinny jeans, black converses, and picked a red tee shirt which was fairly new and didn’t look terrible. It also wasn’t all black, which his father said would make him look a little less like a Satanist. 

Ren didn’t think the red tee shirt helped on that front. He really should have picked a different shirt. 

“Do you ever not wear jeans?” Hux asked, looking him up and down. “It seems like you pick the sloppiest thing you can find whenever you have a choice.” 

Ren felt his ears get hot. He glanced around at the other teenagers, most of whom were in similar dress to Ren. “At least I know how to dress to look like a teenager.” 

Ren couldn’t help but smirk when he saw a light dusting of pink erupt on Hux’s cheeks. Bullseye. 

“Whatever,” Hux muttered under his breath. “Phasma isn’t coming.” 

“What?” Ren asked. 

“You’re blocking the door,” Hux said. He grabbed Ren’s arm and dragged him toward the back. There were a couple of tall bar tables. Hux hustled Ren into one of the chairs and then Hux sat himself at the other. They weren’t that separated from the group of kids already taking their seats near the back.

“Way to be conspicuous,” Ren said sarcastically. 

“Phasma called me. She has the flu. She’s been sick all weekend. Her grandmother won’t let her out of the house,” Hux said stoutly.

“What?” Ren asked, feeling himself go a bit pale. Phasma was the only reason why he’d thought this evening would be at all tolerable. 

“She’s not going to be here,” Hux said. “I thought I should warn you.” 

“Great,” Ren muttered. “This is going to be so much fun.” 

“Thanks,” Hux said dryly. He crossed his arms staunchly over his chest and glared at Ren. 

“Oh please… Hux, do you see how white this place is?” 

“Yeah,” Hux said. Oddly enough he tilted his head a little bit like he was confused. “Have you never been to a DC Church before?” 

Ren snorted. “Like DC is the great White Plains or anything. We only ever went to the Organa’s place. And it’s Catholic… and I don’t know, the congregation is mostly Latino. This is just…. Creepy.” 

“I agree,” Hux said primly. 

Ren whipped his head away from staring at the other Youth to look at Hux. “Really?” 

“The last church I went to had a much more diverse group of Youth and Children’s groups. My dad picked this one. And it’s so fucking white I want to puke,” Hux whispered. 

Ren smirked. “Language,” he said. 

“Some of these Children seem to really think that Jesus looked like the Hitler Youth. It’s terrifying,” Hux said, his tone completely flat. 

Ren grinned wider. “Welcome South, brother.” 

“Shut up,” Hux said, narrowing his eyes to near slits. “I’m actually from Virginia. You’re a damn Yankee. You need to keep your opinions to yourself.” 

Ren’s grin just got wider. Annoying Hux was fun. He deserved to be annoyed after all the shit he’d been saying the past few days. Ren wasn’t completely certain Phasma actually was sick. Perhaps she was just trying to avoid Hux’s dickish ass… but if that was it, Ren was pretty certain that Phasma would have told him so they both could have bailed. 

“Just how sick is Phasma?” 

“She’ll probably be out of school for a day or two,” Hux said. He shrugged and glanced over at the group. A scruffy looking 30-something white guy was now standing in front of the group.

“Come on,” Hux said. 

They got up and tried to get a seat somewhere that wasn’t the front row, but there really wasn’t a space. 

“Are you people allergic to the front row?” Ren muttered. 

“Methodists?” Hux asked with a smirk. “Yes. If you want a seat in the back row you have to get here early.”

“Lovely,” Ren muttered. 

He wasn’t exactly excited about being surrounded by a mass of kids he didn’t know, especially because there were middle school kids there too. Sitting the front meant that the scruffy 30-something looked them right in the eyes and grinned a little too wide to be truly happy. And Ren could feel that people were staring at him. He rubbed the back of his neck and tried to not shudder. 

Ren also found pretty quickly that he was not going to listen. He just didn’t actually care. And the 30-something schlub talked in this tone that wasn’t exactly like he was talking down to them. It was more like he was adding sugar to his voice where sugar wasn’t needed. 

Ren zoned out completely, and slumped down in his chair. He was aware that Hux was ramrod straight in the chair next to him. Ren wondered if Hux even had it in him to zone out. He wondered if Hux really believed all this stuff. He certainly wasn’t happy at this place, but there had been an almost longing in his words when he mentioned his old church. 

Surely Hux had friends back at the old place. Maybe it was like Ren and Connecticut. Clearly it was different, of course. Ren didn’t even have his old friends. He wondered if Hux kept in contact with them. 

Ren was very aware of the jealousy that bubbled in his stomach. He knew it was insane to think so, but Hux was so acidic that Ren had almost fooled himself into thinking that Hux was like him. But that was stupid to think so. Ren was the only one out of them pathetic enough to not have friends. 

“Come on,” Hux hissed in his ear, hauling Ren up. 

“What?” Ren asked, snapping out of his thoughts. 

“Small group,” Hux said. 

“Jesus,” Ren said, earning some dirty looks from the people around him. 

“Word of thumb: try not to use the Lord’s name in vain around here,” Hux said dryly. He moved to stand behind Ren and pushed him over to two girls who were talking behind their hands and giggling. 

One of them was blonde and the other was brunette, both with long hair. The blond wore more make up, but both had a very ‘girl next door’ quality. Ren shivered. Nope. This was not a situation he really wanted to be in. 

“Would you two mind grouping with us?” Hux asked. 

They both giggled and Ren felt his entire face had gone completely red. Hux pushed Ren down into a chair facing the two girls that Ren was pretty certain hadn’t existed in that space before. Hux sat down in a chair next to him. 

“Hi, I’m Jesse,” the blonde said. “This is Sarah.” 

“Hiya, nice to meet you,” Sarah said with a hugely out going smile. 

“This is Kylo,” Hux said, nodding to Ren. Ren was grateful to him. He didn’t want to speak to these girls at all. 

“I thought his name was Ben,” Jesse said. 

“I know Pastor Lynd introduced him as Ben, but he prefers Kylo,” Hux said. Ren was torn between being grateful to Hux for calling him his preferred name, and freaked out that he honestly hadn’t realized that the guy in front had introduced him to the entire group. 

That’s what he got for not listening. 

“So, what did you think about Pastor Lynd’s sermon?” Sarah asked with her very large smile. 

“Um…. Honestly I wasn’t listening,” Ren said. 

“Oh, that’s fine, I zone out a lot too,” Jesse whispered loudly. Her eyes danced with amusement. 

Ren blushed and slumped in his seat a little more. He really didn’t want to talk to these girls. They were nice, but overly energetic. Just talking to them made Ren feel tired. And it made him feel like a fraud. It was like he was only pretending to be a teenager and more responsible than he had been when he was a child. 

The girls, nor Hux made him talk after that. Hux spoke in concise sentences with the group and took neat notes on what was said. When they groups came back to the big group, Hux stood up and gave their agreed upon opinions. 

Ren didn’t listen to any of the words, but he couldn’t help but feel like Hux didn’t really belong there. He seemed like a General addressing his troops. Ren knew that every word Hux said he meant to say. He didn’t stumble. He didn’t say “like” or “um”. He didn’t trail off into uncertainty. He sounded like he meant every word he said. 

Hux desperately needed to join Mock Trial or the Debate Team, or Model UN. Ren had no idea that Hux could be so good at speaking. Certainly when it was one on one it was different. But Hux attacked this speech like a soldier fighting to win a war. None of the other kids sounded as good before or after. 

When Hux sat down Ren bumped him with his shoulder. Hux didn’t even move. So Ren just stayed that way, leaned on Hux. He didn’t listen to what anyone said. He honestly didn’t care. Hux was warm, though, warmer than he expected for someone who came off as so cold. 

Eventually the group did break up, after they sang some songs which everyone seemed to know. Hux didn’t stand up with the others to sing, so neither did Ren. Ren was fine with that, staying pressed against Hux until they were dismissed. Then they just stayed seated while the other kids moved around to get out of there. 

“Will you come back next week?” Hux asked. His voice was very soft, an odd counter point to the noise of the chatter around them. 

“This was very tedious,” Ren said. 

“It was nice having you here,” Hux said. For once he sounded a little vulnerable. Ren looked over at Hux, wondering what it cost Hux to admit that.

“Ben,” the scruffy man said, cutting through Ren’s thoughts. 

“Wha?” Ren asked, turning to look at the man who was now standing in the row in front of them, close enough to touch them. The Secret Service were going to be so happy to learn that Ren would let people sneak up on him so easily. 

“I wanted to thank you for coming. It’s always nice to see new faces,” the man said. “We’d be happy to have you over again.” 

“Oh, yeah,” Ren said. He glanced at Hux, who’d shut down again. He was that cold untouchable statue once more. “I’ll be here from now on, I think.” Hux’s head whipped around and he stared at Ren wide eyed. 

“Really?” the man asked, sounding both surprised and pleased. 

“Really?” Hux asked, sounding surprised and still a little vulnerable. Ren didn’t really like that. He wondered what happened to the Hux from not even a half hour before who could give such strong speeches, and who could be so controlled and yet still apply a cold sort of passion to his speech. 

“Yeah,” Ren said and then grinned at Hux. He wanted to wipe away that vulnerability. Hux didn’t like showing it. Ren shouldn’t be seeing it. 

“That’s wonderful,” the man said, again interrupting Ren’s thoughts. “You’re welcome to come to Sunday School and Wednesday evening as well.” 

“One thing at a time,” Ren said. He stood up and took Hux’s arm, tugging him up. Hux moved pretty easily, which pleased Ren. Especially after Hux had been dragging him around all evening. 

The man laughed. “Of course. You are welcome here.” 

“Thank you,” Ren said, starting to push Hux toward the exit. 

“Why did you agree to come so much?” Hux hissed when they were away from the Youth Pastor. 

“Because that’s what friends do,” Ren said. “They go to boring things so that their friends don’t have to be there alone.” 

“Oh,” Hux said. He stared at Ren for a moment before looking away, “Yeah. Thanks. See you at school tomorrow.” He pulled away and headed out. 

Ren sighed. He watched Hux’s back as he marched out the door. He really didn’t belong there any more than Ren did, but at least Ren was good at hiding that he didn’t belong. 

“Ready to go?” one of Ren’s Secret Service agents asked. 

“Yeah, let’s go,” Ren said.

* * *

Hux wasn’t exactly looking forward to this sleep over. Phasma was still too sick to come. It was weird to have a middle of the week sleep over. Hux was honestly surprised that his father agreed to let him go. He’d been certain, almost hopeful, that his father would come up with some excuse (reasonable or inane) to stop Hux from going. But he’d told Hux to be good and said nothing more about the issue. 

Hux decided his old man couldn’t be any more useless. He couldn’t even be strict when it would have been helpful for once. 

Hux really did not want to go to this. A picture of the two of them at the Youth Program was circulating the conservative blog-o-sphere at that very moment. It was something that came up by accident. A couple of girls taking selfies. Ren and Hux just happened to be in the back ground, walking over to find seats. The girls posted the picture on twitter and the picture got picked up by the conservatives. 

His father was getting good press with his constituents. 

His father had told Hux that he was proud of him. 

Hux honestly didn’t know what to do with that. It was like Kylo saying he’d keep coming because they were friends. Did Kylo actually care about him? That was such a can of worms. Certainly, Kylo knew Hux was gay… probably. But Kylo also clearly liked Phasma. Kylo was just going along with this to cause his family problems. 

If Kylo knew the reason why Hux was doing all of this, there was no way Kylo would agree to do this. 

Hux’s mother dropped him off at the Portico and then left. The Secret Service looked though his book bag and duffle. Hux only had his school books and clothes and toiletries. It only took a few minutes to get him through. 

Kylo was waiting for him, bare foot and in actual black PJ bottoms and a ratty black tee shirt. 

“Why don’t you just dye your hair black?” Hux asked, rolling his eyes. 

“What do you mean?” Kylo asked, tugging at his ridiculous brown curls. 

“If you’re so enamored with looking like you escaped from a goth convention you should at least go all in,” Hux said. Unbidden came to his mind the image of Kylo with black hair and make-up. He refused to blush, shoving the ridiculous image away and not acknowledging that he thought Kylo would look good like that. 

What followed was a moment of silence while they stared at each other. Hux wondered if he’d gone too far again, if he’d actually hurt Kylo. This time it really wouldn’t have been intentional. And Kylo made fun of him for how he dressed just as much as Hux made fun of Kylo. He didn’t think this would be too bad. 

“I love you too, Brendol,” Kylo said, rolling his eyes. Something in Hux’s chest eased. Maybe he hadn’t pushed too hard. “Just come on,” Kylo said, turning and walking down the hall. 

Hux followed after him. It occurred to Hux how weird it was that Kylo could just walk around in pajamas and bare feet in one of the most highly decorated buildings in the country. It was a little like someone licking the Mona Lisa. Which Kylo would definitely also do, given the chance. 

Hux sighed and let Kylo lead him back to his room. He tried to not think of the stink of Ren’s feet getting into the carpets. He tried not to think about whatever disgusting things Kylo might have dropped on the carpet, especially in his bedroom. Hux shivered involuntarily as he crossed the threshold of Kylo’s bedroom. 

“You really think I should dye my hair?” Kylo asked before he even shut the door. 

“I don’t see why not,” Hux said. Kylo had all this thick brown hair, curls and waves and too long for school, but who was going to tell the President’s son no? Not that Kylo saw that. He was too wrapped in whatever made up problems he had plaguing him. 

“I mean… there’s rules,” Kylo said. 

Hux snorted. “Like you care about rule.” 

“True,” Kylo conceded. He walked over to his dresser and looked at the attached mirror. He touched one of his curls and pulled, bringing it all the way out to its full length before he let go. The curl bounce right back to its position like a spring. 

“Your hair is dark enough that it shouldn’t be too hard, I would think,” Hux said. 

Kylo turned around and gave him a very suspicious look. “Do you know anything about dying?” 

“Not really,” Hux admitted. 

“Hmm,” Kylo said, turning back to the mirror. “I’ll ask Phasma then.” 

“Right,” Hux said dully. He set his duffle bag down and then carefully slipped out of his shoes. He left the pressed with the toes against the wall, out of the way. 

“So, I got a thing,” Kylo said. 

Hux looked up. Kylo was still looking at himself in the mirror. Hux tried not to scowl. He supposed if he looked as pretty as Kylo that he’d look at himself in the mirror like that. Hux was too white skinned. He had too many (if properly hidden) freckles. His face was too long. He had a boring nose, ridiculous cheek bones and too low brow too pink lips. 

He wished he looked like Kylo. For one thing he’d have those brown eyes that could go from cold to warm in a second, and those very kissable lips, and that perfectly silly nose of his. When Kylo smiled he looked like he could have all the happiness in the world. Hux knew he looked awful when he smiled. 

And most of all, if Hux looked like Kyko, then Hux wouldn’t be related to his father. 

Hux took a deep breath and pulled himself out of his thoughts. Apparently Kylo wasn’t even paying attention enough to realize that Hux had zoned out for a moment. Even Kylo’s face wasn’t that interesting. Kylo was just an ass. “Is it contagious?” 

“What?” Kylo asked, turning to look at Hux. Confusion had settled fully on his brow. 

“Your thing,” Hux said with a smirk. “Is it contagious?” Maybe the humor was low brow. But it worked. Kylo’s face turned completely red all over. 

“Ah, no,” Kylo said. Hux was pleasantly surprised that Kylo didn’t splutter like a moron. “It’s about working on our… ah… story?” 

“Oh,” Hux said, realizing that Kylo was actually talking about business. “The plan.” Couldn’t Kylo have just said that? Did he have to wander around the point so much? Hux could barely stand people who saw no use for bluntness. Kylo could be blunt, but he could also be very dull. And worse yet, he could wind around too many topics. Hux found this combination of traits very frustrating on a good day. It was especially so when he was already feeling of kilter due to the location and event. 

“Yeah,” Kylo said, before he smiled a little. His full smile was nicer, but rarer. These tiny smiles Hux got to see more often. “I saw that picture. It’s a good start.” 

Hux raised a brow. “You read the conservative blogs?” Maybe Kylo actually did keep up with the news.

“I have notifications set for whenever someone writes about me,” Kylo said with a shrug. Ah, narcissism. That made more sense. It was a little disappointing, but that was Hux’s fault for thinking better of Kylo for a moment without having the evidence to back up that feeling. “Anyway, if you want to piss people off we should get a picture at some point of us making out in your Youth Building.” 

He was smirking, but Hux grimaced. He wasn’t certain he liked the idea of such a flagrant act of irreverence. He didn’t like when straight couples made out there and posted pictures. It was crass. Certainly he didn’t like his current church very much, and cared less about respecting the sanctity of a place that didn’t seem to have much respect for actual sanctity. It was just another very large, very DC like and very white church. But he wasn’t certain he’d be welcome back at Washington Street if he came out like that. 

“Wait, are you like an actual believer?” Kylo asked. Well, Hux would give Kylo that much. He at least picked things up quickly. But only when he wanted to.

“Yes,” Hux said, keeping his voice flat. 

“So you like all of… well, that?” Kylo asked, making a vague hand gesture. 

“One day I will take you to Washington Street, the church I grew up in and you’ll understand,” Hux said. He crossed his arms over his chest. It wasn’t cool, but those were the people who’d supported his mother. There were people there who’d taken him over night whenever his mother needed him out of the house when he was a kid. Hux knew now it was the church women banding together to try and protect Hux from his father, and in doing so they did their best to give his mother her dignity. 

Kylo scoffed. Hux felt his anger rise and he had to bite it down. Kylo would never get it. Hux felt hate crawl right up his throat. He wanted to strangle Kylo in that moment. He really did. 

“What is this idea of yours?” Hux asked through gritted teeth, deciding that changing the subject was best. 

“It’s not exactly an idea,” Kylo said, going from haughty to nervous in seconds. “It’s just that I thought of something. Like a problem, maybe.” 

“Maybe?” Hux asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“Yeah well,” Kylo said. He shifted a bit. “We’re supposed to kiss where people can see.” 

“Yes,” Hux said. 

“Have you ever kissed anyone before?” Kylo asked. He still looked nervous. In fact he looked even more nervous than before. It was as if he wanted Hux to understand something and Hux wasn’t getting it. Maybe Kylo was finding his fairly impassive face unnerving. Good. 

“No,” Hux said, using a nonchalant tone. He was trying for the vocal equivalent of boredly inspecting his nails. “Why?” 

“Because I haven’t either,” Kylo said, his voice beginning to pitch a bit into panic. “In case you thought I could guide you through a kiss. I’ll have you know that I cannot. You really need to be a better planner than this, Hux.” 

Hux wrinkled in his nose. “What on earth are you talking about?” 

“Kissing!” Kylo snapped, looking more than a little manic. And his cheeks were a wonderful shade of pink from embarrassment and anger. Hux liked that. 

“Yes, I hear that. I don’t see what the issue is,” Hux said calmly. He did his best not to smirk, but it was very hard. “We’ll kiss for the pictures.” 

“We’re going to look like idiots if we kiss for the first time in front of reporters,” Kylo said. Well, he grumbled it, and he looked down and away, all embarrassed. But Hux felt his cheeks starting to heat up as well. 

“Oh,” Hux said. He could just imagine what that would look like. He couldn’t help but wince. 

“Yeah, oh,” Kylo said. “So I was thinking that if neither of us knew what we were doing we should practice so it doesn’t look pathetic on camera.” 

“Right… right,” Hux said. He could feel his face getting hotter and hotter. He hated how he blushed. Kylo looked kind of cute when he blushed, but Hux knew he just looked splotchy. 

“So… do you want to?” 

“Want to what?” 

“You know… practice?” Kylo asked, absolutely not looking at Hux. 

“Yes, that sounds good,” Hux said. He licked his lips. “We should do that.” 

“Okay, go sit in the bed,” Kylo said. 

Hux went and sat on the bed. Kylo was an ass, but he was a cute ass. Hux had a feeling he was going to like this even if the kissing was terrible. For him, he imagined it would be like how Kylo would imagine kissing Phasma. When you kissed someone so far outside of your league it had to be amazing no matter what. At least, Hux assumed so. 

He did his best to not think of every time he maybe could have kissed someone (mainly girls his mother or father, or other extended relation tried to set him up with). He didn’t need to remember his awkward fumblings to escape such situations. This wasn’t being forced upon him for the sake of heteronormativity and looking good for constituents. He was choosing this. It didn’t have to be romantic. It just had to get done.

Hux stayed seated, waiting for Kylo to do something. Maybe he would come and try to bend over and kiss Hux while he was standing over him. Maybe sit down next to him on the bed and lean in to kiss him. Then Kylo did do something. Kylo sat on the other side of the massive and firm mattress. He sat there and there was an entire expansive of bed between them. For a moment neither moved, but then Kylo got up on his knees and crawled over to sit right beside Hux, basically in the middle of the bed. Hux had to twist to be able to see him. 

Hux wasn’t exactly experienced but he had to wonder what in the world Kylo had seen to make him think that would be a good positon for kissing. 

“Pull your legs up on the bed and scooch closer,” Kylo instructed. 

Hux understood instructions. It was easy to do what he was told. He was nervous, but he knew he wasn’t showing it on the outside. He imagined Kylo was feeling annoyed at how Hux probably seemed like he didn’t care. But he did care. He didn’t exactly feel sentimental about it, but this was going to be his first kiss. And his father couldn’t ruin that. 

He set his shoulders and surged forward, planting his lips on Kylo’s. 

It wasn’t like what he read about in his mother’s very secret romance novels. It wasn’t like any movie he’d seen, or anything he’d heard people talk about. It didn’t harken herald angels. It didn’t change his life. It wasn’t like lightning in a bottle. It was just a little pressure. It didn’t actually feel like all that much. 

What was the fuss? 

But then Kylo pulled back and licked his lips a little like he’d tasted something really good. He had this really intense look in his eyes that made Hux’s stomach roll over. Did Kylo even know he was looking at Hux like that? Like he was something to want? 

Hux was just being sappy, he was certain. He closed his eyes and shook his head and tried to clear out the cobwebs. When he opened his eyes he found Kylo was very close, right in front of his face, actually. Hux blushed. 

“Can we practice again?” Kylo asked, his voice breathy. He was close enough that Hux could feel the warmth of Kylo’s breath. His personal bubble was completely popped. 

“Yesss,” Hux drew out. His heart was pounding so hard in his chest that he felt certain that Kylo could hear it. How could Kylo think it was okay to be so close? Hut moved forward a little. Maybe he was okay with the closeness. 

Kylo met him the rest of the way. It was such a weird feeling. Just a tiny bit of skin pressed against a tiny bit of skin. Their lips moved against each other. Yes, his lips were more sensitive than other parts of his skin. But then so were his palms. Hux found the kiss about as sexy as a handshake. But then Kylo pulled back and he had that hungry look on his face again. 

Hux leaned in and kissed him again. Still it didn’t feel like much. He went to pull back, but Kylo followed him and kissed him again. Hux stayed still, deciding to let Kylo try what he wanted. He at least seemed to be enjoying himself. Hux barely got that thought across his mind before Kylo shifted and gave Hux another kiss. He pressed a kiss to the corner of Hux’s mouth, but in the process brushed the tip of his nose very light over Hux’s cheek bone. That small extra bit of contact made Hux gasp. 

Kylo seemed to take Hux’s open mouth as an invitation because he slipped the tip off his tongue into Hux’s mouth, running it over the bottom of Hux’s upper lip. Hux felt a sizzle of extra feeling that made his heart jump up into his throat and then drop down into his stomach. A split second later was a strong feeling of not wanting Kylo there. 

Hux turned his head. “No,” he said quietly. 

“No?” Kylo asked. He stopped, becoming completely still. 

“No,” Hux said, with a note of finality. “I don’t like it. I don’t want to do this anymore.” 

Kylo had been leaned right into Hux’s space, but now he pulled away. He sat back and looked at Hux like Hux had just wounded him. It made Hux grit his teeth. He had to resist slapping that look off Kylo’s face. Then Kylo licked his lips and Hux felt his stomach drop. He wanted to watch Kylo lick his lips. He wanted Kylo’s lips pressed to his cheek and his nose lightly rubbing against the smooth skin of Hux’s face. He just didn’t want to kiss Kylo. 

He didn’t want to kiss anyone. 

A shame Hux hadn’t realized he could feel swamped him. It ran cold through his veins and settled hard in his stomach. He knew he didn’t want girls. He knew he wanted boys. But he’d never dated anyone, or kissed anyone, or even truly held hands. He had always assumed that his first kiss would just cement it what he’d been so certain about. He’d believed it would brush away the lingering doubts in his mind that sounded eerily like his father’s voice. He’d assumed it would be like the movies. He’d been a fool to think anything would easy for him like that. 

“Did I…?” Kylo’s words broke his self-conscious reverie. “Was I really bad?” 

Hux dropped his gaze. “No. I just don’t like kissing.” 

“But you gasped like you liked it,” Kylo protested. 

“It wasn’t the kissing that made me gasp,” Hux muttered. “Kylo, please, I don’t want to kiss anymore.” 

“Okay,” Kylo said. His tone became so gentle, like Hux was an animal that would spook if he wasn’t careful. Hux glared at Kylo. He wasn’t weak. No one should ever think he was weak. 

“I’m not a child you have to coddle,” Hux hissed. 

“I know,” Kylo said, still in that careful tone. “What did you like?” 

Hux’s ears felt like they were on fire. He focused on his dark slacks and not on how Kylo was making him feel. Because he was feeling so many things. He wasn’t an idiot. He knew he was attracted to Kylo Ren, but he wasn’t in love with him. Kylo was a pretty face to spark Hux’s libido. And Kylo was making him feel small, but not caged. He was trying, but Kylo was bad at being caring and not condescending. 

“When your nose brushed over my cheek,” Hux said. “I liked that.” 

He glanced up in time to see that Kylo’s face had gotten very red and his eyes had gotten very huge. It would have been comical if the entire situation weren’t so awkward. Kylo reached up and started fingering his nose, clearly self-conscious. 

“You really liked that?” Kylo asked. 

“Yeah,” Hux said. 

“Can I try that?” 

“You want to?” 

“Well, yeah,” Kylo said. He moved close. Hux forced himself to stay still so Kylo could get close enough to touch him again. 

Hux closed his eyes and let out a breath. He could feel Kylo’s warmth flooding into his area. Hux knew that human bodies radiated heat; that if Hux held one hand over another part of his body, even without touching that other part of his body would begin to warm up. But feeling Kylo in his space, close enough to feel that radiance was a new experience. 

And then Kylo was touching Hux. He had a hand on Hux’s side, just under one of Hux’s arms, and their legs were bumped together. Hux could feel Ren’s nose brushing over his cheek. His breath caught again. Kylo’s nose started to move in lazy figure eights over his skin. Hux wondered if Kylo thought he was silly. Hux wasn’t going to open his eyes to see Kylo’s mocking gaze. 

Besides, Hux was having trouble finding the will to breath. He just kept holding it, and every intake and exhale was shaky. Kylo move from the apple of Hux’s cheek back to Hux’s ear. Hux let out a sound he had to describe as a strangled mewl. His face heated up even worse. That was humiliating, most of all because Hux didn’t want it to end. His hands were on Kylo’s arms, keeping him from moving away. 

Kylo’s mouth opened, Hux could hear it. He could feel the hot breath on his ear. Then Kylo started to whisper and that hot breath blew right into his ear, and that feeling went right to Hux’s dick. 

“I’m going to kiss you here,” Kylo breathed. “Tell me if you want me to stop.” 

Kylo kissed the shell of Hux’s ear. Hux gasped and tightened his grip on Ren’s arms. 

“M-more,” Hux heard himself beg. 

He could feel the rumble of Kylo’s chuckle in his ear. Then Kylo kissed him again. It sent warmth through Hux’s whole body. Was this what Kylo had felt when they’d been kissing? Because Hux would definitely have given Kylo a hungry look back if kissing had felt like this. 

Suddenly Kylo’s tongue was in Hux’s ear. Hux yelped and smacked Kylo’s arm, wrenching away. Hux’s eyes slammed open and he glared at Kylo who had the audacity to laugh. 

“You should see your face,” Kylo said, his face split into that wonderful wide, gleeful grin of his. 

“Screw you,” Hux said. That was an undignified thing to say, but Hux was feeling like Kylo had just snatched his dignity away. 

“I’m sorry,” Kylo said, seeming to sense that Hux was hurt, not just angry. Kylo shifted back into Hux’s space before Hux could close up. “I’ll be good,” he promise. “Let me try again. I like this.” 

“Do you?” Hux asked, not letting himself look at Kylo in case there was any mocking in Kylo’s gaze. 

“Yeah,” Kylo said in this breathy way that made Hux’s heart jump. 

Hux was about to say something when Kylo moved right back to Hux’s ear. Hux expected lips, but what he got was teeth. There was just a little nip but it made his stomach and heart and everything inside him became total goo. 

“Ohhh, do that again,” Hux got out. He didn’t pay attention to his own tone. He closed his eyes, because Kylo was chuckling again and it was a deep, wonderful, soft sound. And Kylo’s breath made his whole face feel warm. And then there were teeth on his ear again. 

Kylo gave the shell of Hux’s ear gentle nibbles and bites. Every single time teeth touched Hux’s skin he let out these cut off gasps. His whole world became his ear and Kylo’s teeth and he didn’t want anything to stop that. 

Of course it did come to an end. 

Someone knocked on the door. 

Kylo got up, shouting that he’d be right there. Hux turned to be certain his back to the bed. He didn’t care who it was, but he didn’t want them to see his face all red, and his whole person feeling ruined in a way Hux knew he’d want to feel again. 

The ear Kylo had given so much attention to burned like it was on fire. Hux touched it, feeling the heat there. He wondered if there would be a bruise there in the morning. He doubted it, Kylo had been very gentle. He knew that it was better for there to be no sign of what they’d just done, lest his father see. But Hux regretted that he wouldn’t be able to feel it in the morning. The feeling of fire was already starting to fade. 

“Hey, is pizza good with you for dinner?” Kylo asked a little loudly.

“Yeah, it’s fine,” Hux said a bit distantly. Normally he loved pizza. It was something he only got if there was a school event, and then only as long as his father didn’t find out about it. Normally he would be very happy about it and want a chance to offer his opinion on toppings. But normally he also hadn’t just had so much physical attention. 

“They’re going to make a specialty and a cheese,” Kylo said, hoping back onto the bed. Hux turned to check that Kylo had in fact closed his door. Whoever it was had gone. 

“Good,” Hux said. He pushed himself onto his hand and knees and gave Kylo a kiss. Kylo kissed him back. It still didn’t do anything for Hux. But when they pulled apart Kylo was grinning. 

“What’s that for?” Kylo asked. 

“Thanks,” Hux said and then sat back down. That was done. It was enough for one night. 

“Sure,” Kylo said. “Want to play Call of Duty?” 

“I’ve never played that before,” Hux said a bit dull, trying not to betray that he was embarrassed about that fact. 

“Sweet!” Kylo said, jumping off the bed. “I can teach you to play!” 

Hux found himself smiling a little. Kylo could be such a child sometimes.

But Hux was coming to find that he didn’t mind that too, too much.


	5. Chapter 5

Phasma rarely got sick, but when she got sick it hit her like a brick to the head. To be honest she’d rather have the brick to the head. At least then she would be able to breathe through her nose and her entire world wouldn’t taste like mucus. The one truly good thing about her being sick is that her mother fucked off and left Phasma in her grandmother and grandfather’s hands. 

They cooed over her and coddled her through her illness. As hard as she could be, as hard as she knew she could work through an illness, there was still something very special about being able to fall asleep with her head in her grandmother’s lap while her grandpa gave her a foot rub. 

Sadly, all good (and bad) things must come to an end. Come Monday Phasma was back in school, after having taken the weekend to catch up on all the work she’d missed. She arrived at school with all of her text books to stuff into her locker and a stack of papers to turn into each teacher, which she did before homeroom. 

She had too much stuff to do that morning to have to worry about dropping off work. She strode to homeroom in her high, strappy black heels. It kind of annoyed her that as much as she thought her flagrant uniform code infractions would get her in trouble, she’d basically been left alone. Hell, other girls were starting to dress like her. She’d overheard teachers saying at least the girls were covered. Secretly, Phasma was pretty certain that the male teachers liked to ogle the girls asses in their very fitted uniform pants. 

Oddly enough, the female teachers seemed to either not care or be supportive of the girls wearing the guys uniform. 

She was looking for some kind of extreme measure to fight back against the lethargy, and she knew just the boy to help her out with her mission. It took seconds to find Ren when she walked into homeroom. He was in his usual, fairly coveted seat in the back. He got there so early, because of Rey, that he always got the best seats. His bag was tossed into one chair and his feet up into the other, effectively saving seats for her and Hux. 

It was funny that he’d swung his feet up into her seat. She wouldn’t actually give two shits if she walked around all day with dust on her butt. Hell, it might be funny to watch other girls smack chalk onto their rear ends to emulate her style. But Hux would care very much if anything so much as a stray dust particle were to land on his uniform. So much for the stereotype of girls being the fussy ones. 

“Did you get my card?” Ren asked when he saw her. 

“Yes,” she said. He dropped his feet to the floor and she sat right down. “Tell me, did you really go to a grocery store to pick it?” 

“Nah, Hallmark, but the Secret Service were so happy with me that day,” Ren said with a wide grin. The trouble maker. 

Phasma smiled too. She hadn’t expected to get anything from Ren or really hear from him. He was pretty bad at social interaction. But he’d sent her a very nice Get Well card, one that wasn’t just a silly one, but oddly thoughtful. She wondered how many cards he’d read before he found one for her. Just having to get the Secret Service to take him to the Hallmark Store to buy a card had to have been a lot of effort. 

She knew that he’d sent it himself, especially because he’d actually written ‘Get Well Soon- Kylo Ren’ in his super messy handwriting on the inside. She’d gotten enough get well cards sent directly from the Hallmark website and unsigned. She knew when someone actually picked thee card and sent it themselves. 

She’d put Ren’s card in her shoebox of memories with her 1 Year Chip from NA and other important things she kept at her grandparents so her mother wouldn’t ruin them in a drug filled rage. Ren was her friend. He actually liked her, even if he had a hard time showing it. 

“I kissed Hux,” Ren said in a quiet rush, breaking into her mushy thoughts. But really, for the new he was delivering it was totally worth it. 

“For real?” she asked. “So he agreed to practice?” 

“Yeah… Phaz, Hux doesn’t like kissing… have you ever heard of that before?” Ren asked.

“Well…” Phasma trailed off. “To be honest, I haven’t heard of it specifically, but I absolutely loathe sex, so I don’t have a problem imagining that some people don’t like kissing. But are you sure it’s not just you?” 

“He said that he thinks he just doesn’t like it. He turned super pink when I kiss his ears, though,” Ren said with a shrug. He was smirking, the cocky bastard. 

“Oh, what’s that like?” she asked. She had a hard time imagining Hux cracking for anything but anger. 

“Awesome,” Ren said with a grin. “I mean, I knew I liked guys for the most part, but t-b-h, I really had no idea. And he has really soft lips. And he lets me kiss him even though he’s not really into it because he said he could tell I liked it. But I really liked the tiny noises I get out of him when I bite his ears, so it’s not like that’s any imposition.” 

“You look like the cat that got the cream,” she teased, grinning as well. Good. Looked like Hux really was human after all. 

“I feel like that could be made into asome sexual pun,” Ren said, still smirking. 

Phasma laugh. “I’m pretty sure you gotta want pussy before you can make a pun out of that, deary.” 

Ren laughed too. He seemed a lot more content than the last time she’d seen him. Maybe some of his teen angst was just sexual frustration. She hoped that was Hux’s issue too, because otherwise he was going to go through his entire life with an iron rod shoved so far up his ass that it might actually replace his spine. 

“So, you know how you wanna annoy the fuck out of your parents?” Phasma asked. She planted her feet firmly on the floor and leaned forward. 

“Yes. You got a new thing?” he asked. 

“How do you feel about scandalizing absolutely everyone?” she asked. 

“What do you want to do?” Ren asked. 

“Put you in my uniform,” she said. Ren’s mouth literally dropped open. Phasma grinned slowly and broadly. “I bet you have the legs for it.” 

“I absolutely love you,” Ren said. He looked enthusiastic, which was what she’d kind of hoped for but not exactly expected. Guys generally, in her experience, got pretty pissed when you ‘questioned their masculinity’. “Hey, do you know anything about hair dye?” 

“Yeah, what do you want?” she asked. 

“Black,” Ren said. He tugged self-consciously on his very brown curls. 

“Yeah I thought that was a possibility. Look, are you free say tomorrow afternoon?” she asked. 

“I mean, I have to check, but I think so,” Ren said. 

“Yeah, so I missed the last sleep over so can I come over? I’ll take you and Rey-Rey shopping, how does that sound?” 

Ren looked thoughtful. “Well, mom does want Rey to have more older women to look up to, and she absolutely adores you. I think it’ll be good for her… they’ll probably agree.” He pulled out his phone, probably plugging it into the family calendar. 

“Awesome,” Phasma said. 

“Yeah, it’ll be good to get to spend time with you after it was just me and Hux all last week,” he said. 

She understood what he meant. Ren was a social idiot, but Hux was so cold. When he opened up it was to lash out. Apparently ear nibbles opened him up in a nicer way, but Phasma knew Hux was super gay and wouldn’t appreciate it from her. She’d have to figure out some other way to get Hux to calm his tits around her. 

Well, she would if she wanted to continue to get to know him after this plan was over. She was pretty on the fence about that at the moment. 

“Hux,” Ren called suddenly, snapping Phasma out of her thoughts. 

She watched Ren move his bag out of Hux’s seat. Originally Hux had always sat in front of Phasma, but now he’d moved to sit in front of Ren. She wasn’t certain whose idea, but she was going to guess it was a side effect of her being gone for a week. 

Then again, from the ridiculous puppy smile on Ren’s face, maybe it was Ren’s idea. 

His crush was pretty cute. She just hoped that Hux didn’t wreck him once their plan was over. 

But if he did, Phasma knew that she’d be there to pick up the pieces. True friends were rare in her line of work, but she wanted Ren to be one of them. He was sweet and earnest, if kind of a jackass too. But she knew what loneliness could do to a person. After all, that’s why they’d all agreed to this plan to begin with. None of them belonged with anyone else. 

* * *

Asking his parents not even 24 hours before the event had been a problem, but when he explained that Phasma wanted to take both him and Rey out shopping, and that she absolutely adored Rey things went a little easier. When he explained about her pop girl support group and about how she’d sung Disney songs with Rey, his mother agreed to his request. It seemed she wanted Rey to have another good role model. 

He lay awake that night thinking about how odd it was that his mother thought Phasma, a recovering drug addict, fallen pop star, and general rule breaker was a great role model for Rey. 

For once his mother came to breakfast with them and he got to ask before Rey got down to the table. 

“It’s very simple, dear one,” his mother said. “Your friend had a lot of shit thrown at her all at once when she was younger. And while she might still slip along the way, she’s trying to make the best life for herself. I want Rey to see that, not just the idea that girls have to be either whores or madonnas. She needs to know it’s okay to not be perfect, and that the pursuit of a good life can be much more noble than the pursuit of perfect. Phasma and her grandmother are both admirable women. Plus, Phasma is protective of Rey and other girls. That’s always a good sign.” 

Well, it certainly gave him something to think about on the ride to school. 

“I’m really excited about this afternoon,” Ren said over lunch. He was tucked into Phasma’s side. It was starting to get chilly. He’d given her his jacket, but it was cold enough that he’d needed to stay close to keep warm. Hux sat across from them, easily unbothered by the cold. 

“Some video game tournament?” Hux asked. Ren felt a warmth spread through his chest. Hux didn’t know video games and didn’t have much access to them, but he’d listened to Ren talk about the matches he loved playing. Kicking strangers’ asses at Halo was always satisfying. 

“Nah, lover boy,” Phasma said. “I’m taking the Organa babes out shopping today. And I get my evening with Ren.” Then she grabbed Ren’s head and dragged him over and kissed his temple. It left a slime trail from her gloss that he had to wipe off, and then attempt to scrub off vigoursly with his napkin, but it made him laugh. 

Hux had been pretty scowly after that. Maybe Ren should have invited him, but he was certain that Hux Sr never would have allowed his son out for a shopping trip. And Ren was nervous about this transformation. He’d told Rey a little bit, but not all of it. 

He felt his heart pounding at the thought alone. He really hoped that Phasma wouldn’t make him look bad. He trusted her, but he couldn’t help his nerves. 

After school he walked with Phasma to retrieve Rey from her class. 

Rey bounced out her normal sunshine self. She threw herself at Ren’s middle and hugged him tight. He was used to this greeting and didn’t have a problem bracing himself. He bent down and hugged her back. She pressed her cheek to his side and looked past him to Phasma. 

“Hello Miss Phasma,” she said with no hint of the childish shyness that young Ben had always spoken with.

“Hello there Rey-Rey,” Phasma said with a smile in her voice. 

“Ready to go?” Ren asked. 

“Yep,” Rey chirped, disentangling herself from him. She led the way to the car, keeping ahold of big brother’s hand as they walked. 

They had about triple the Secret Service detail as they normally would. Or at least they would once they got to the Mall. Between the two of them and Phasma, Ren suspected the Secret Service was cursing his name. He knew they’d have fanned agents out at the mall already. 

The three of them piled in the car and buckled in. Ren turned radio Disney on low, knowing that Rey wanted to have it on and that Phasma didn’t actually mind that much. 

“What are we doing?” Rey asked far too sweetly. Ren eyed her. Rey could be as manipulative as his mother when she wanted to be. He bit his tongue to keep from calling her on it this time. He knew she’d find out soon anyway. 

“We are going to all buy pretty, girly things,” Phasma said. “Skirts and make up and the like.” 

“Even Ren?” Rey asked, her eyes getting comically huge. 

“Especially Ren,” Phasma said. “That’s the whole point of this trip.” 

Rey turned and looked at her brother with those huge eyes. “But boys don’t wear skirts.” 

“We do if we want to,” Ren said, feeling defensive. 

“Do you want to?” Rey asked. 

Ren licked his lips. At first it had just been something he’d agreed to in order to piss of his parents. Then he’d gone looking up men wearing skirts and found himself aching to try. They looked good. He wondered if Hux would like him dressed up like that. He’d taken time in the shower to get himself off to imagine Hux reaching under his skirt and jerking him off. 

He knew that it wouldn’t happen, of course. Hux would never break propriety like that, but it was a good fantasy. 

But the images he saw reminded him of the upside down cross and LP on his book bag. They were the part of him that wasn’t cool at all, but wanted to express that part of himself, even knowing it would get him stared at funny. 

“Yeah, I do,” Ren said. 

“So we’re gonna need your help, Rey-Rey,” Phasma said. “We’re gonna help him find pretty things and then you and I and your big brother are going to keep it a secret until he’s ready to show off. Sound like something you can do.” 

“Yes,” Rey said. “Don’t worry, Ren, we’re going to make you super pretty.” Her huge, huge smile made him feel a lot better. 

If nothing else, these two girls would accept him. 

They arrived at the mall after a while. Traffic in DC could be really nasty. The Secret Service escorted them in. They were in plain clothes, and it looked like a couple of adults were escorting two teenagers and a little girl on a shopping trip. At least that’s how they’d look in theory. The Secret Service were pretty good at blending in, but sometimes Ren still felt very conspicuous with all those people watching him, even if it was for his own safety. 

Phasma picked the first store. It was mostly a place that sold hair supplies. Phasma picked out a black that would be easy to use that evening, but also wasn’t made to wash out. Ren didn’t want his parents to try and force him to wash it lout later. 

“Do you want to get ribbons or anything?” Phasma asked, eyeing a few of the hair accessories that were there. 

“No,” Ren said flatly. 

“But-” she started. 

“No,” he insisted. He didn’t want to be a girl. He just wanted to wear things that were…prettier and nicer than what he normally picked. 

“Okay, okay,” Phasma said, rolling her eyes. 

They paid and moved onto the next store. The next few hours was a blur of learning terms Ren had never heard before. Things like tulle and chiffon and taffeta. He’d never realized how many different fabrics there were and how many of them sounded like venereal diseases. He also never realized how many different types of skirts there were. Draped, wrapped, bubble, knife pleated, godet, tulip, circle, tube, mermaid, paneled, and others he’d simply lost the name of. He was pretty certain he couldn’t even name all of the types of skirts he’d even been stuffed into. 

He remembered tulle because both Rey and Phasma had bought a tulle skirt. While Rey’s looked adorable and girly on her, Phasma looked like a runway model. It was the first time Ren really understood about clothes in context. He remembered taking to things in dark colors, like the rest of his wardrobe. He also knew that he’d gotten dragged to a place that did nails and got what was not his first ever mani-pedi. (He had a little sister who sometimes wanted to try “grown up things”, and he’d rather take her than send her by herself with Secret Service agents). They just happened to leave with all his nails a glossy black color that he really, really liked. 

When they arrived home from their little excursion, it was to find that their parents had run off for an impromptu date night. Ren was fine with that. He didn’t want them to find out and try to stop him before he even really got a chance to try. Ren and Rey ordered pizza for the three of them from the chef. Then the three of them dragged all of Ren’s new stuff to his bedroom. 

It wasn’t so bad really, having Rey spread out across his floor with her homework while Phasma helped him dye his hair. They did math while the dye set, and a little more after Ren rinsed his hair and let it air dry. Once his hair dried, then Phasma really got to work. 

She listed off the names of the things she use: concealer, mascara, and eyeliner. He applied his own chapstick. Then came the outfit. He’d picked it because it seemed pretty low maintenance. It was kind of a pain trying to figure out how to get into the black tights, but the rest was pretty easy to figure out. The denim skirt sat just above his finger tips and the long sleeved black cotton blend shirt was loose and flowy. Phasma had him shove his feet into a pair of his normal black boots and that was all of it. 

“See, pretty easy,” Phasma said, fluffing his newly black and dry hair. 

“This is still way, way more work than I’d do to wear my own clothes,” Ren said, batting her hands away and running his fingers through his messy waves and curls until it felt right to him. 

“Well, these are also your own clothes now,” Phasma said. She placed a hand in front of his face, not touching his eyes to keep from messing up his make-up. But she walked him over to his full length mirror. 

“You look really pretty,” Rey said from her spot on his floor. 

“You do,” Phasma said. “Ready to see?” 

Ren took a deep breath and braced himself. He knew he could easily look like a fool, but Phasma seemed to like him a little bit. She wouldn’t make him look like an idiot. Probably. At least she was dedicated to fashion enough that she probably wouldn’t let him out of the house looking a total mess. Even if he looked bad now.

“Yeah, I’m ready,” he said in a hurried tone. He needed to see before he chickened out and demand that Phasma take all the make off and throw out the clothes. 

Phasma dropped her hand and stepped back, leaving Ren faced only with the mirror and his own opinion. 

Oddly enough, his first thought was that Phasma had been right about his legs. They didn’t look like girl legs, but they were… well, shapely, and with the tights they looked pretty good. As nervous as he had been about shaving he was glad he had. The tights were really nice against his smooth skin.

His eyes moved to the rest of the outfit. The shirt, even though it had a wider neck than what he was used to, and could easily dip off one shoulder, didn’t make him feel exposed. The skirt was actually very pretty and flowy, which surprised him since he was used to constricting skinny jeans. 

He’d had a thought that maybe he would look like a girl when he wore a skirt. But he didn’t. Even with the make-up and the acrylic nails he didn’t look like anything but himself. He still looked like a boy, just a boy who looked pretty hot in a skirt. If anything, he felt like he looked more right than he had before he’d seen his own reflection. 

Ren felt a slow smile spread over his face. 

“I love it,” Ren said with pretty strong conviction in his voice. “It’s great! It’s-”

“It looks great on you,” Phasma interjected gently. 

“It does,” he said. He turned his back to the mirror so he could look at Phasma only to see that she and Rey were both smiling at him. 

“What?” he asked.

“You don’t smile like that anymore,” Rey said. She sounded a little sad. Ren turned around to look at himself in the mirror. He realized that he was smiling, broadly even. His face actually was aching a little bit. He clearly wasn’t used to smiling like this anymore. He could remember smiling a lot before they moved… but now? No, he really didn’t smile that much, and never so wide. 

“It’s a nice look on you,” Phasma said. “Smiling, I mean.” 

Ren blushed a little more. He turned around again and dragged Phasma into a hug. “Thanks Phaz. I didn’t realize how much I needed this.” 

“Yeah, never underestimate the power of a make-over.” 

“I won’t,” Ren said. 

He pulled away and let Phasma guide him back to sit on the floor and arrange his legs so he wouldn’t accidentally flash anyone. This skirt was shorter than the one he’d wear to school, but he needed the practice anyway. 

He changed back into his boy clothes before his parents got home, but he kept the hair and nails. He felt like less for having done it. The new look It earned a double take from his dad, and no other comment from either of his parents. He didn’t know if he liked or hated that. He knew he’d get a much bigger reaction from then when they saw his new clothes and make up. But he needed to wait until after school for that. He wouldn’t let anything stop him from wearing that girl’s uniform. 

He slept that night with his nose pressed into Phasma’s back, feeling content in a way he hadn’t quiet realized was possible.

* * *

Hux was not jealous of Ren and Phasma’s sleep over. Hux had been over with Ren alone before. It was only that Ren had invited both him and Phasma the last time, but only Phasma this time. Hux never would have gotten a solo invitation. But, really, Phasma was coming over to hang out with Ren’s little sister, who Hux didn’t even like that much. So, no he wasn’t jealous. He was just a little frustrated because his father hadn’t been able to keep his hands to himself when he’d been out to dinner the night before and the pictures had been caught online. Hux was pissed about that. He wasn’t pissed that he hadn’t been invited. 

He did come to school grumpy though. It was definitely made worse because people wouldn’t stop whispering. He could hear all the other students making useless noises, but none of it really loud for him to make out. Not that he really wanted to hear any of it. Maybe they were talking about his dad, but probably not. And He didn’t care what they were talking about. It was only that thy wouldn’t stop buzzling like flies in his ears. He had trouble holding onto himself. He couldn’t help but imagine smacking whoever got close to him. 

He dumped his extra books in his bottom locker and slammed it shut before he hefted his bag onto his shoulders, came out of the squat that was killer on his knees but kept floor dust off his pants, and walked stiff legged into homeroom. 

He didn’t get very far in before he saw what had had caused all the chatter. 

Kylo and Phasma were posing together against the white board for a couple of girls who had their phones out. They looked like models. 

And what Kylo was wearing! 

The uniform blazer had always fit Kylo well, but it was buttoned now and hugged his shoulders and slim middle. His hair was completely black, and he clearly, clearly was wearing a touch of make-up. Worst of all was the skirt. 

It had to be Phasma’s. It was the uniform plaid and it sat just above Kylo’s knees. He wore black tights, and black army boots. 

He looked good. Hell, he looked amazing. And he looked perfect standing next to Phasma like that. They looked like a dream couple. Thinking that made Hux’s heart twist. 

The girls stopped snapping pictures and Ren turned a bit. He stopped when he noticed Hux. He waltzed right over, even doing a little spin for Hux to get the full view. It also made his skirt twirl out a bit. “What do you think?” Kylo asked with a big anxious smile. 

Hux looked Ren up and down slowly. He swallowed and then licked his lips. “It…. Suits you,” he went with. 

“Really?” Kylo about chirped. 

Hux snorted lightly. “I literally don’t know anyone else who could get away with such audacity. It suits you.” 

Kylo’s grin got wide and Hux felt an urge to kiss him. He considered it, but he also had enough self-control to not. One day, maybe. But they had to be dating first, visibly. This wasn’t the way he wanted to come out. But he would reward Kylo with a kiss later. He deserved it. 

“Come sit down before the teacher fusses,” Hux said. He grabbed the sleeve of Kylo’s blazer and tugged him back toward their seats. “Is this why you invited Phasma over?” he asked that question much quieter. 

“Yeah,” he said. “She and Rey helped me out. And she helped me change into her uniform in the bathroom this morning… and did the make-up.” 

Hux let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. Kylo hadn’t been leaving him out. He’d just been getting help from the person who would be able to best help him. Hux could also imagine Kylo not wanting Hux to criticize him. But considering how happy Kylo acted to see him, Hux thought maybe Kylo just wanted to make it a surprise. 

“I understand,” Hux said quietly. He escorted Kylo to his seat. Kylo sat down primly, like a girl who was afraid of someone looking up her skirt. When Hux sat down in front of him, he could see Kylo’s blush. 

“It’s cold,” Kylo hissed at Phasma. “Even with the stockings, it’s cold.” 

“Why do you think I hate wearing the uniform skirt?” Phasma asked, rolling his eyes. 

“Wait, you can feel the chair through your skirt?” Hux asked. 

Phasma snorted. “No, the skirt rides up a bit when you sit, basically his thighs are touching the cold ass plastic. 

Hux starred for a moment, then he dropped, swooping down to look under Kylo’s desk to see that yes, his stock clad thighs were pressed to the cold plastic of the hair. Hux let out a low whistle. He could just imagine what that kind of access could mean. 

“Hey,” Kylo whined. Hux felt fingers slide into his hair and tug, pulling his head up. Hux went willingly. He’d never realized, but he rather liked having his hair pulled. It was an interesting thing to discover when he had no time to consider it, especially because Hux got a look at Kylo’s super red face. 

“Don’t be a perv,” Kylo mumbled. 

“It’s cute,” Hux said. He straightened up in his seat and pulled out his fold out comb from the inner pocket of his blazer. He brushed hair had back to regulation. It gave him a good excuse to look away and get his blush under control. He couldn’t quite stop himself from thinking about shoving his head under Ren’s skirt now. 

“Man, I knew you were that much of a dork,” Phasma said. 

Hux was very grateful for the distraction. He finished setting his hair back and folded his comb up, putting it back in its place. “It’s proper to look proper,” Hux said. 

“Is it proper to look like a model out of the school manual?” Kylo asked. 

Hux turned and gave him a withering look. “You’re just jealous that you’d be the model for the ‘what not to wear’ side.” 

Kylo grinned broadly. Hux’s chest tightened a bit. He really loved when Kyko smiled like that. If skirts made him smile like that more, then Hux really, really liked it.


	6. Chapter 6

Going home that afternoon was nerve-wracking. Then previous night had seen his father staring a bit at his newly black hair and nails, but no real comments good or bad from either his mom or dad. And while Ren had originally bought his skirts exclusively to piss his parents off, he now felt like it would crush him if they made fun of him for it. The skirts made him feel okay, okay right in his soul. He didn’t really know how to explain it. But it felt like him. When he looked in the mirror he felt like he could see himself in the mirror for the first time in years. 

A couple of his Secret Service detail’s eyes went wide when they saw him come out of school. None of them made comments, but considering his detail was trained to not get distracted and to be able to be controlled in the face of most surprises, his appearance shocking them so visibly was not a good sign. Ren didn’t like his odds of what would happen that afternoon.

He did his best to not feel too scared about it. Instead he focused on Rey. He really loved his little sister. She knew he was nervous even though he was actually smiling and telling her how much Hux seemed to like how he’d looked. Maybe she knew he was nervous because of the chatter. 

Maybe it was the fact that he’d spent his first period in the office while the administration argued about the fact that the rules didn’t say that any student had to wear a gender specific uniform, only that they wore the uniform to described regulation. And that he got send back to class by second period because he was wearing the uniform close enough to regulation that he couldn’t be sent home for it. And maybe it was that he’d already told Rey all of that before they even got to the car. 

Rey took his hand once they got out of the car and dragged him through the entrance hall back to his room. He was grateful for that. He needed to know where his hiding spaces were. He sat down at his low coffee table with Rey. They spread their homework across the table and settled in for the work. 

Ren allowed himself to get distracted by math. He’d always liked math. Well, he liked it when it was taught well. He wasn’t exactly a stellar student, but he didn’t hate any topic. He hated teachers and classes, but not subjects. Given the right teacher he could be good at anything. Last year he’d really enjoyed Science and English. This year it was Math and History. Although the history bit was more because he and Hux would pass notes back and forth to each other, making note of inaccuracies their teacher made. References included.

It was the nerdiest game of one-up-manship that Ren had ever taken part in. But Ren’s first history papers were going to be amazing, between all the research he’d already done, and all of the references Hux had offered him on those notes. Ren already had his outlines written on a couple of topics, and they hadn’t had a paper assigned yet. 

About an hour in there was a knock. “Come in,” Ren called. He assumed it would be someone with a snack for him and Rey. He got up on his knees so he could reach to the far end of the table and grab the eraser he’d flung over there earlier

“Ben, I heard,” his father started, but halted completely when he actually got the door open. Ren froze completely as well. There was no denying what he was wearing or what he looked like in the positon he was in. 

“Daddy?” Rey asked. 

“Leia!” their father shouted. 

Ren winced. “Rey, how about you go do homework on your own for a while?” 

“But-” she started. 

“Please,” Ren said. He didn’t want her to see whatever happened. And he didn’t want his parents to soften their opinions just because Rey was around. If they hated it then he didn’t need to allow himself to think there was some wiggle room. He needed to know exactly what he was getting from them. 

Ren stood up, so that his father could see his legs in the black stockings and how he looked in the skirt. Neither of them said anything, just stared at each other while they waited for the women in their family to act. Rey shoved her books and papers into her bag and then walked toward the door, ducking around their father’s legs. 

She looked like she planned to say something, but Ren cleared his throat. He didn’t want her trying to stick up for him. She turned and saw his face. Whatever expression he wore must have conveyed that, because she turned and walked away. That was about the moment that his mother walked up behind his father. 

“Han, what- oh!” She gasped a little when she saw Ren. 

Ren felt his ears get very warm. He refused to break eye contact, though. His mother nudged his father in before she shut the door behind him. Ren instantly felt both cornered, and yet also relieved. Yes, he was stuck, but this would be private. 

God, his mother’s eyes were huge in that moment. Ren looked away. He couldn’t stand to think about what she was thinking. His stomach had dropped out, and he knew, just knew this was going to be bad. 

“What the hell are you wearing?” His mother demanded. 

Ren swallowed and settled his mouth in a pout. He couldn’t force a scowl when he already wanted to go and hide. He had secretly been hoping that his mother would say he’d looked good, that maybe she’d calm his dad down and say it was okay. He knew he was stupid to think such things, but he had hoped. Turned out he was very wrong. 

“Phasma and I traded uniforms,” Ren said. 

“Is it some costume day? Like a spirit week thing?” his dad asked. Ren hadn’t really been paying attention to him, so his stomach jumped when he heard his father’s voice coming from near his desk. Apparently he’d gone and sat down, bringing him further into the room. 

“No,” Ren said, working to make his voice flat an emotionless. He was proud at himself for succeeding. 

“I got a call from the administration today,” his father said. “I couldn’t believe it. I mean, yeah Luke might have dressed up for the parades, but he at least always understood context.” 

Ren felt his face heat up more. He found his uncles yearly trips to the Pride Parade honestly embarrassing. His normally very serious uncles would wander around in skirts and heels like it was costume. To be compared to that made Ren angry. 

“It’s not a joke and it’s not a costume!” Ren snapped. “I like it! I’m going to keep doing it, and unless you want to hold me down and dress me yourselves every morning like you did when I was five, you can’t make me stop.” 

“Do you have any idea what an embarrassment this will be to the campaign?” his mother demanded. She sounded so frustrating. “It’s little things like this that mean all the difference. I know you need to do you teenage rebellion phase, but this can’t be it.”

Ren felt tears come to the corner of his eyes. His chest felt very tight and he had to snarl just to keep from sobbing. 

“Don’t act like that to you mother,” his father snapped. 

“This isn’t just some phase! I like this! I want to look like this! I want to be like this! It makes me happy!” Ren shouted. 

“Don’t take that tone-” his mother started. 

“It’s not a tone. It’s not small. I want this, dammit! I need this! It’s the first time I’ve actually been happy in over a year, and I just knew you couldn’t be happy for me, because neither of you even care about me. It’s about the campaign for you all the time. Well I’m not a campaign. I’m nearly 16, and I did something for me and you tell me I’m just trying to be difficult.” 

“You know, I knew it,” his father said. “I knew that Hux kid was no good. I bet he put you up to this, didn’t he? Trying to help his old man.” 

Ren was momentarily stunned to silence. He stared open mouthed at his father. He couldn’t even fathom how he’d made that jump of non-logic. 

“Screw you,” Ren whispered. 

“Ben-” His mother started in warning. 

“No! Hux hates his father as much as anyone! He’d never, ever have told me to do this! He’s way too straight laced and proper for this! But he didn’t treat me like I was stupid or just trying to cause a problem because I-” his voice caught and he swallowed. “Because I liked it, so he liked it because I liked it.” 

“Okay,” his mother said, holding up her hands to make both Ren and his father be silent. “I think we can agree that Brendol Hux didn’t put you up to this.” She looked between them both, glaring at them to keep them silent. “Did Phasma?” 

“She suggested, but it was something I wanted. I want this. I like how I look,” Ren said. He felt like he wanted to just curl up and crumple. But he wasn’t going to allow himself that. He was going to make it through this and he wasn’t going to give up. 

“You know you can’t go outside like this,” his mother said. 

“Why? Why can’t I? Why is this wrong? The school couldn’t actually fault me on regulations. I’m covered except for my head and hands,” Ren protested. 

“Because you look ridiculous,” his father sniped. 

Ren felt his face crumple. He couldn’t help the tears that slipped out. “I think I look good,” he whispered. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked down at his feet. 

He refused to look up. He could hear his parents move closer, and he could hear them whispering. But he didn’t try to listen. Did he really look ridiculous? Hux had looked at him like he was desirable. And Phasma had said he looked great. And he’d had girls come tell him how good he looked. 

But maybe they’d all been laughing at him. The girls had been giggling when they’d come up. And maybe Phasma’s sharp smiles weren’t about her personality. Maybe they were actually cruel. Maybe she was setting him up as a joke. And Hux? 

What if Hux really thought he looked awful? What then? 

“Ben?” His mother’s voice cut through his turmoil and his head shot up. She was standing right in front of him. She had one of his father’s handkerchiefs and she was trying to dry his face. He closed his eyes and let her do it. “Your father didn’t mean it like that,” she said gently. “Is it just the uniform or is it other things?” 

“Others,” Ren whispered. “We… bought them yesterday.” Rey said he’d looked good. But she was so young, what did she know? 

“You really want to look like this?” she asked. 

“Yes,” he whispered. Even if he looked terrible that way, he still wanted to. He’d been happy when he looked in the mirror. “Sometimes,” he added even more quietly. 

His mother let out a very heavy sigh. 

“We could stop you, but I’m afraid that would be more traumatizing than helpful. For now I’m going to assume you’ll get bored eventually if I let you do this. But you have to wear stockings of some kind whenever you wear skirts, or shorts under them in the summer. No low cut tops or short skirts. And you’ll make a note of whenever you do in a calendar I’m going to set up. I need to be on top of this for the campaign. If you break my rules this ends.” 

“Yes, mother,” Ren said. He didn’t meet her eyes, because he didn’t open his eyes. 

“Ben, look at me,” his mother said. 

Ren opened his eyes, but he looked at her cheek and nose and wouldn’t meet her eyes. It was like she thought he was going to dress like a slut or be specifically embarrassing. He didn’t think it was embarrassing. But then, what did he know? Maybe he really did look like a fool and he was just fooling himself. 

“Alright, you should finish your homework,” his mother said. She stepped away and Ren let her. 

He quietly lowered himself back onto the floor and looked down at his homework. He didn’t look up at his parents as they walked out. They might have said goodbye, but he wasn’t listening to them. He was staring at his unfinished math. They didn’t tell him no, so why did he feel so crushed?

* * *

Hux wondered what it would take to set up another group study with Phasma and Kylo. Trying to study at home alone was pretty tedious, especially when Hux now had a really solid idea of what Ren did when he wasn’t studying. Hux had never played video games before Kylo shoved the game controller into his hands. He was bad at it, but he’d enjoyed it in some sense. He couldn’t really let himself like it too much. It wasn’t like his father would ever actually allow Hux to play video games. 

No, his phone and computer were monitored. At any point his father could check his history or text messages. He was pretty certain his father had installed a keylogger on his keyboard. He used his computer for political research and school only, the same with his phone. Ironically, the school computers would be safer for him to look up gay porn on, because at least the school computers had other people use them. 

But studying or approved physical activity was basically what Hux was allowed to do after school. Reading was about the safest thing he could do, because could and had hidden books he didn’t want his father finding on his bookshelf, or by cutting a cover off a thoroughly boring book and putting it over a text he knew his father wouldn’t like. 

But Hux didn’t want to read. And laying around being bored wasn’t something he was good at doing. So he was studying something he already knew and wishing that Kylo and Phasma were there to crack jokes. If they were there his mother would be smiling because she’d be happy that he had friends. And his normally coffin like bedroom would be full of noise. 

Hux let out a sigh, or began to. His phone started buzzing. He answered it instantly. “Hux speaking,” he answered stiffly. 

“Hux?” That was Kylo, except he didn’t sound happy or superior like he normally did. He sounded too small and too quiet. It was wrong. 

“Kylo?” Hux asked. He was surprised by how worried his own voice sounded. It took him another moment to realize that he was worried. 

“Hi, Hux,” Kylo said quietly. 

“Kylo, what’s wrong?” Hux asked. Maybe he should had tried to be gentle about it, but he didn’t want to. Something was wrong, and Hux couldn’t fix it until he knew what was wrong. 

“It went bad when my parents saw,” Kylo said. 

“Ah,” Hux said. His heart dropped a bit. “Did they throw you out?” 

“No,” Kylo said quietly. “Mom agreed if I didn’t dress like a hussy and I told her when I was going to do it… but.” He stopped abruptly, like that last word was its own sentence. 

“But?” Hux asked. 

“Did I look stupid?” Kylo asked. “Today, at school? Did I really look bad?” 

“What? No!” Hux protested without thinking. As such, he spoke too loudly. He blushed and tried again. “No, Kylo. You looked very good.” 

“I don’t know,” Kylo whispered. 

Hux squared his shoulders. He’d spent his entire time at home trying to stay distracted and try to not masturbate while his parents were still awake. Kylo Ren was a beautiful boy. But he looked even better when he was happy and comfortable, which was exactly how he’d looked in the girl’s uniform. 

“Now listen to me,” Hux said. He spoke quietly, but clearly. He glanced at his door, hoping that no one would hear him. He’d just have to take the risk. “You looked beautiful today. You have always been attractive, but today you were beautiful. There wasn’t anything silly or bad about how you looked. It was perfect for you. Do you understand?” 

There was silence on the phone and Hux felt his heat pound. Oh hell, what if that really freaked Kylo out? Kylo definitely wasn’t gay. Maybe he was Bi, but he wasn’t gay. And even if he was, there was no way he could like Hux like that. Maybe Hux had really crossed a line by complimenting Kylo that way. 

Then Kylo laughed and Hux had to tightly hold in a sigh of relief. 

“Jesus, even your compliments sound impersonal,” Kylo said. He wasn’t speaking in that tiny strained voice at least. 

“Don’t take the lord’s name in vain,” Hux said. He could feel his own smile. Kylo laughed harder and that made Hux smile more. Kylo laughing at him was much more normal than the tiny voice. 

“You’re an ass, Hux,” Kylo said. “But thanks.” 

“You’re welcome,” Hux said. “Better?” 

“Yeah… did you really mean what you said?” 

“Yes, Kylo. You looked the best you’ve ever looked today. And you’ve never looked bad, even when you were being very sloppy.” 

Kylo snorted. “Which is always, by your calculations, I take it?” 

“Something like that,” Hux said.

“Yeah, well… I better finish math… I just… thanks, Hux,” Kylo said. 

“No problem,” Hux said. “Thank you for calling. You’re welcome to call more often. Just-”

“Short calls, yeah, I get it,” Kylo said. He didn’t sound unhappy or dismissive. Hux had explained that his father didn’t like Hux talking on the phone for too long. If anything, Hux appreciated that Kylo remembered. 

“Good Night, Kylo.” 

“Night, Hux,” Kylo said. 

He hung up. Hux heard the dead air. He kept the phone to his ear for a few more moments before he slowly lowered it and set it down. He was still smiling like an idiot. 

He stood and walked to his mirror, watching his smile. He looked like a giddy fool. But Kylo had been in distress and he’d called Hux. He’d called Hux and Hux had made it better. Hux couldn’t think of the last time anyone had ever depended on him, not for something like that. Kylo called Hux like he believed that Hux wouldn’t use his acid tongue to rip the already vulnerable boy to shreds. And Hux hadn’t. 

“He trusts me,” he whispered to his reflection. 

He let himself be happy for a moment. It was a wonderful moment. But when it ended he fixed his face back to neutral and went back to studying. He couldn’t be caught being happy, especially when he wouldn’t be able to explain why.

* * *

Ren was in jeans, sneakers and a tee shirt. Honestly, it was just easier to go to this meeting like this. Lee Federal Penitentiary was in Virginia, and could be a pain in the ass to get to. He also didn’t want to accidentally get seen by another inmate in a skirt. He didn’t want to imagine what they’d imagine about him after that. 

Oddly enough, federal prisons tended to be less terrible than state prisons. Ren knew this was because people with money normally ended up in federal prisons, while state prisons didn’t get that breed of prisoner, and honestly probably didn’t care about their occupants in the same way. Most of the prisoners in Lee were from organized crime, or from murdering an FBI agent. 

Anakin Skywalker was a special case. He was an honest to God domestic terrorist. But his children were influential and well-loved public figures. Ren didn’t feel bad about whatever special treatment his grandfather got. He was just happy he got to see the man every month, and wished he could see him much more often. 

He was kind of hoping that his grandfather would be allowed a day pass for his graduation. Ren wasn’t stupid enough to think it would happen. But he wished it was possible. 

He had a couple of Secret Service come in with him, as always. They sat at other tables, leaving Ren his privacy. The visitation room was cleared whenever the First Family came, so there was no chance that Ren would get hurt. But he never complained about the extra guard. 

His grandfather was escorted in. His face instantly moved from a scowl to a smile when he saw his grandson, as it always did. Ren was smiling too. He stood up and moved to his grandfather’s side of the table and opened his arms for a hug. 

His grandfather crossed the distance with quick strides before he pulled Ren into a hug. They got to a savor it for a moment before the guard cleared his throat. Ren kissed his grandfather’s cheek and then darted away and sat down back in his own metal chair. 

“How have you been?” His grandfather asked, smiling warmly. He looked a lot like Uncle Luke when he did that, except that Uncle Luke had always smiled easier than his grandfather had. 

“I’ve been well,” Ren said. “I brought new pictures.” 

He nudged the envelope over to his grandfather. Ren always made certain to come with a selection of photos he’d taken on his phone and had printed out. Often times he would use them to illustrate his stories. He had pictures from his trip to Hallmark and a couple from inside school. He made certain to get a picture with him and Rey in their uniforms. This time he hadn’t just included scenes like traffic or trees from the limo. But he had a pictures from his shopping trip with Rey and Phasma, and from school with him and Hux and Phasma. And one with him in the girl’s uniform. 

Ren was really, really nervous about his grandfather’s reaction to that. 

He watched his grandfather’s face as he flipped through the pictures. His eyebrows rose, and Ren’s stomach flipped over. Had he gotten to the skirt picture? 

“Isn’t this that girl you used to like?” his grandfather asked, turning the picture around so Ren could see. It was Phasma hugging Hux, and Hux looking annoyed. 

“Yeah, Phasma. She’s in my class… we’re… friends, and that’s Hux. His dad’s super conservative. His family ended up over for dinner,” Ren said. 

His grandfather laughed. “I imagine your mother absolutely loved that.” 

“It was very uncomfortable,” Ren said. “I think that I’m going to be Out before the next time I see you, but I wanted to tell you first, okay?” 

“You know I don’t care. Wedge makes your uncle very happy,” his grandfather said. He was still smiling as he flipped through the other photos of Hux and Phasma. “I’m glad that you have friends again. It’s been too long.” 

“Yes,” Ren said. Then he let out a sigh. “They aren’t really my friends… I mean I wish they were. But we’re in conspiracy together?” 

His grandfather’s eyes danced. “Oh, something dastardly?” 

“Just public parental embarrassment,” Ren whispered. “Hux and I are going to start dating. But not like for real. And then I’ll fake date Phasma for a bit. Anyway, it’s going to be a big mess.” He smiled at the thought. His mother deserved the headaches. 

“So a little dastardly, but mostly fun,” his grandfather said. “Are you certain they aren’t your friends, though?” He turned one picture around and Ren got to see Phasma hugging him tightly. Ren really loved that picture because it was mostly just Phasma’s face. Hux had taken a great picture, and Phasma looked so happy. 

“She’s a great actress,” Ren said, shaking his head. 

“You know you could ask her to just be your friend.” 

“No. She’s way too cool for me,” Ren said with a rueful smile. 

“And this Hux kid? He doesn’t seem cool to me. Unless they changed what cool meant.” His grandfather turned a picture over. It was one Ren had taken. Hux was studying his textbook very closely. He’d scrunched his nose at something in the text and Ren found it adorable. 

“Nah, Hux is a dork, but I like him. He’s mean, but he’s not like… bad. I mean he can tear you up something awful. But he’s not evil, mostly.” Ren knew he was smiling, thinking about the way Hux looked at his legs, and the way Hux had called him beautiful when Ren had been falling to pieces over the phone. 

“You like him,” his grandfather said. “And not in a friendly way.” 

Ren blushed a bit, but he smiled and nodded. “Yeah… I think so. I mean, there’s no way he’d like me. Hell, he practically hates me. He always fusses at me for being messy and not working hard enough and stuff… but when I kiss him it’s just like… perfect. And the other night I was upset and I called him and he made me feel better so fast. I really like him.” 

His grandfather reached across the table and laid his hand on Ren’s. Ren squeezed his hand and sniffled a bit. 

“He’s never going to like me back,” Ren whispered. 

“You don’t know that.” 

“I do,” Ren said. “If he did then he wouldn’t have told me to date Phasma, even for fake.” 

His grandfather sighed and pulled his hand away. They could get away with brief touch, but not much without the guard fussing. His grandfather began to look through the other photos. Ren tried not to squirm. 

The guards had already been giving Ren strange looks. They always checked the photos he brought, as if they thought he’d bring a photo of some escape plan. The man who’d been looking through the pictures had frozen when he’d gotten to that last picture. He’d looked up at Ren like he was a freak, then shaken his head and cleared him to go through. 

His grandfather froze suddenly and Ren was certain that he saw. Ren dropped his gaze and he stared down at his fingers. Phasma liked how he looked. Rey liked how he looked. Hux thought he was beautiful. That was enough. It would be enough. 

“You look so much like your grandmother,” his grandfather said. 

Well, he hadn’t expected to hear that. He looked up at his grandfather. The man had tears in his corner of his eyes. 

“Grandfather?” 

“I’m sorry, Kylo. I just miss Padme,” he said quietly. He stared at the photo for a moment before he put it down. He cleared his throat. “Is this something you’re doing now?” 

“Yeah,” Ren said. “Phasma had me try it… but I really like it. Like a whole lot and I don’t plan to stop just because it’s hard.” 

“Don’t ever stop just because it’s hard,” his grandfather said. He grabbed Ren’s hand again and gave it a squeeze. “Your grandmother never would have. That’s what happened… why it turned out the way it did. She and Obi Wan hid the kids away, and she went back home to get help.” 

“I thought she died during a boat trip,” Ren said, furrowing his brows. 

“She died between here and Europe, a storm sunk her boat. But she was going back to her own country for help, because no one was listening to her here. She protected Luke and Leia. And then she went to try something else, to try and save them and me and all those people… it was just bad luck that ended her… but it also meant that I never got the chance to warp your mother or uncle… she saved all of us, and to do it she left everything she’d ever wanted.” 

His grandfather paused and took a deep breath. He rubbed at his eyes, getting the tears away, and letting go of Ren’s had at the same time. Grandpa Anakin always got emotional when he talked about his wife. Ren wished he could find someone who he could love him that much, and who would love him the way Anakin Skywalker had love Princess Amidala.

“Sorry… all I mean is that you should never run from what’s hard. Your grandmother never stopped. Try to be more like her. You’ll be better for it,” he said. “And you looked lovely.” 

Ren’s face broke into a broad grin. That’s what he’d wanted from his parents to begin with. He’d wanted them to tell them that he looked right dressed in his skirts. Because Ren felt right. Being told he was like his grandmother was the highest compliment his grandfather knew how to give. Being like Padme Amidala was the greatest thing in the world anyone could achieve in Anakin Skywalker’s mind. 

And he thought that his grandson looked like her. That thought just made Ren grin even broader. 

He launched into stories from school, and things that happened, and filled his hour with his grandfather filling in the gaps from the letters he sent. One hour a month really wasn’t enough time for everything that Ren wanted to do with the man. But he was so, so grateful to have any time with him at all. His grandfather understood him when no one else did. 

And his grandfather thought that maybe Phasma wanted to be his friend, and that maybe Ren should try to date Hux. Ren wasn’t going to pursue these things. But he could dream. Having his grandfather’s support made the dream feel all the more real than it had before. And it gave him something to hold onto even after he said his goodbyes and left Lee Federal Penitentiary.


	7. Chapter 7

Phasma had been able to miss the first Youth meeting, but she wasn’t able to avoid the second. She thought as soon as she walked in that she really, really wished she hadn’t agreed to go at all. Ren told her when he was coming, which was early, apparently. They’d texted on the way there. 

“You know it’s not too late to go home and change,” Her grandpa said. 

She knew he was eyeing her outfit. She was wearing army green loose pants that secured tightly around her calves, which drew people’s eyes down to her black strappy stilettos with the golden snake anklets. Her top something her mother had chosen for her: a black, tight fitting asymmetrical crop top which covered her boobs, and wrapped around her neck, but also bared both her shoulders and had a deep cut in past her right shoulder. The pants fit high wasted enough and when matched with a jeans jacket it was basically Youth House ready. Her makeup was dark and extreme around the eyes. Her lips were black which faded into yellow. And she’s curled the mat of fluff that sat on top of her head, making the shaved sides stand out more. She looked masculine and feminine and completely the image she portrayed for the cameras. 

She smiled, showing her teeth. “It’s for solidarity,” she told him. 

“You’re not going to make your friend stand out less by standing out more yourself,” her grandpa said, but he shrugged. “But it’s nice to see you care about someone.” 

“He looks so, so good Grandpa. He’s happy. I don’t want him to be made fun of here, and he insists on going,” Phasma said. She started to nervously rub her hands together. Hux told her how wrecked Ren had been after his parents hadn’t supported his new wardrobe. Simultaneously, she’d gotten Ren’s two hour long, full glowing report on how much Anakin Skywalker had liked his skirts. 

It was a strange day when you found yourself agreeing with a mass murderer and wanting to throttle the President of the United States. 

Her grandpa pulled up to the front of the Youth House and Phasma smiled. Ren was already out there waiting with a couple of secret service agents. He was pacing back and forth, looking very much like a nervous cat. 

“Well, that looks pretty good,” her grandpa said. 

Phasma grinned broader. “Tell him that,” she said. She opened the door. “Kylo Ren, get your ass over here!” she called. 

Ren pivoted on his heel and turned to walk over to the car door. He was wearing a blue and green plaid shirt which would look very masculine, except that is was bloused and tucked into a forest green pleated skirt. He had on his black boots and those black tights again, but it was a good match. He also looked super nervous and wasn’t wearing a lick of make-up.

“Can you help me with my face?” He asked. 

“Sure,” Phasma said. “But you have to learn to do it on your own at some time.” 

“I have been practicing at home and watching Youtube tutorials,” Ren said. “But… you know, Hux is gonna be here. And it’s the first time he’s seen me in something besides the uniform, so please?” 

Phasma resisted the urge to coo at Ren for being an adorable nervous wreck. 

“Okay, I’ll help you,” she said. “Ren, this is my grandpa, by the way.” 

“Um,” Ren started, blushing bright red all the way to his ears. “Hello, sir.” 

“It’s nice to meet you,” her grandpa said. “I can tell you’ve been taking lessons from our Fanny. You look very good.” 

Ren’s face lit up in a huge smile. “Really?” 

“Absolutely,” he grandpa said, smiling his normal warm smile and nodding. “You kids have fun.” 

“Thanks grandpa. I’ll text you when we’re done, okay?” Phasma asked, climbing out of the car. 

“Of course, baby girl. Have a good evening, you two,” her grandpa said. 

Phasma waved and shut the door and then turned back to Ren. “So, did you bring your make up with you?” she asked. 

“Yeah,” Ren said. “You know purses are kind of useful.” 

“I know, right,” she said. She shifted her Michael Kors cream leather backpack purse. Ren had a matching one in black. Phasma thought it was a little like a friendship handshake they could wear. 

She grabbed Ren’s hand and guided him inside. The restroom sign was in the back. She dragged him into the first one she could find, which was for girls. There was a lovely ceiling to wall mirror, as well as a large mirror over the sinks. 

“Perfect,” she chirped. “Now, we really, really need to talk later about actually styling your hair.” 

“I thought we agreed it was fine if I just brushed it,” Ren said. 

“For most days, but since you want to impress a guy you need to put a little extra in, okay?” Phasma explained. 

She dropped her bag on the counter and opened it up. She had a lot of hair supplies from back when she’d had hair, and she had grabbed some on a whim, one she was glad that she’d given in to. She pulled out a fold up brush and a head band. 

“What’s that for?” Ren asked. He was eyeing the supplies in her hand as she continued to dig until she found bobby pins and a tiny bottle of mouse. He sat his purse down next to hers. 

“A chignon headband,” Phasma said. “Face the big mirror.”

Ren obediently turned to face the mirror, allowing her to brush his insane curls into some form of submission. She added a bit of mousse and then put up the headband and started to roll in hair up into back of the band. 

“So, what are you doing?” he asked. She looked at him in the mirror, only to see that he was watching her in the mirror as well. She gave him a soothing smile. 

“It’s a really simple process. It’s good for messy-ish hair, but also can look pretty. Basically you roll the hair up into the band. So you get something that can look either like a hairstyle off a Grecian Urn, or like something some 20s flapper might wear.” 

Ren snorted. “Well, that’s quite a variety.” 

“It depends on the hair type and the work you’re willing to do,” Phasma added. She finished up and moved around front to fix his bangs, and then settled a few bobby pins into his hair to keep everything in place, since she’d down such a quick job. 

“How do I look?” he asked. She instantly hated how tentative his voice was. 

“Cute,” she assured him. “We add a bit of make-up and he’s gonna love it.” 

Ren inhaled deeply and then breathed out, in a shakey manner. “Okay Phaz, I trust you.” 

“Damn right you do,” Phasma said. She finished with his hair and went and got his make-up kit out of his purse. 

She began the process of making up his face. She went for a more natural look, though she added a burgundy lipstick, because she knew it would make Hux stare at Ren’s lips all night long and think about kissing him. She sort of hoped that Hux would have to quickly go wash his mouth in the bathroom before going home that evening. 

“There, you’re beautiful,” Phasma declared when she finished. 

“Really?” Ren asked. His teeth flashed in a nervous smile. 

“Gorgeous. I promise,” she assured him. 

She squeezed his shoulder and stepped aside, letting him get a look at himself in the mirror. Ren stepped right up to the mirror. He lightly rested his fingertips on the mirror. He was so close that his breath was lightly fogging the mirror. But Ren’s eyes kept running over his face and hair, as if begging his reflection to show the beautiful boy that Phasma assured him he was. 

She felt a rising urge to smack his mother in the face. 

“Oh, I’m sorry,” a soft, feminine voice asked. Phasma whipped her head around her see a very small girl standing by the door. She had her black hair pulled back in a messy bun and Phasma would guess that they were maybe the same age, though Phasma was a giant compared to that girl. “Is this a line?” 

“Oh, no. just helping my friend with their make-up,” Phasma said. 

The girl laughed and that sound made Phasma’s heart squeeze a bit. “You better be careful. Some of these people labor under the delusion that make-up is the devil’s paint set.” 

Ren snorted. “Is the face the devil’s canvas then?” 

“Mine certainly is,” Phasma said. 

“Oh,” the girl said. “You’re not a girl.” 

“No,” Ren said slowly. He carefully turned around to face the girl. 

She let out a low whistle. “Oh…. Today is gonna be so much fun. Please don’t head out until I’ve peed. I need to see people’s reactions!” she chirped and then ducked into one of the stalls. 

“Is that bad?” Ren asked quietly. 

“I don’t think so. She’d be screaming if it were bad,” Phasma said. “Here, come help me pack up.” 

“Oh, yeah,” Ren said quietly. 

The two of them put their own things away and zipped up their bags. Ren was still new enough to make-up that he was trying to put everything in its proper place. It was cute. It reminded Phasma of when she was wee and got her first set of make-up brushes. Now she tended to throw them haphazardly into her make-up bag and not worry too much. 

Phasma heard the sound of a toilet flushing and the tiny girl ducked into the space next to Phasma to wash her hands. 

“I’m Treena,” the girl said. 

“Phasma,” Phasma said. 

“Yeah, I know,” she said. “And… uh… Ren, right?” 

“Yeah,” Ren said. A surprise smile lit up his face. Phasma liked the girl even more just for that. 

“Say, you look kinda awesome. Are you two going to get pictures before you go out and face the masses?” Treena asked. 

“Well,” Phasma started. “I wasn’t gonna… but you know, Ren it’s a good idea.” It certainly would help to add to the scandal. 

“Well… yeah, let’s do that,” Ren said. “Who’s phone?” 

“How about everyone’s?” Treena asked. “I’ll take your pictures together if I can also get pictures with the two of you. Deal?” 

“Sounds fantastic,” Ren said. He dug around in his purse and pulled out his phone. Phasma did the same.

It took about ten minutes to get all the pictures. Ren posted one on his Instagram before they even left the bathroom. The look on his face was pure vindication when he strode out of the bathroom, his head held high. Phasma couldn’t help but smile at that. This was much better than the nervous, sad Ren she’d encountered outside of the Youth house. 

“He seems happier than last week,” Treena said as they two of them followed Ren out of the bathroom. 

“Was he unhappy last Sunday?” Phasma asked. 

“He wasn’t comfortable. I don’t blame him. I mean, the only reason I’m even okay here is that I’m white passing. My sister looks more like our mama. She can’t stand to come, but papa insists,” Treena said with a heavy sigh. 

“Ah, politics,” Phasma said, glancing at Treena. She’d assumed white when she’d seen the girl, in part because Ren had spent a significant amount of time complaining about how white the youth group was. It was to her own embarrassment that she realized Treena was probably Latina. Phasma was glad she hadn’t said anything. 

“You tell me,” Treena said. 

“Wait,” Phasma said. She shot her arm out and caught Treena before she could get much farther. 

Hux was standing in the back waiting for them, glaring at the door. He clearly thought they were late. He didn’t see Ren striding over to him like he owned the world. Then Hux heard Ren or something, but he turned around and faced Ren. 

Phasma wished she could have gotten a chance to see Ren’s face too, but seeing Hux’s face was great. His ears and neck got red, but there was a short moment where his usual cold, guarded nature dropped away, and a shockingly sweet smile graced his face. In that moment Phasma found herself wondering if Hux was only dating Ren for fake. 

But then the normal cold face was back and Phasma found herself sighing. 

“Boys are stupid,” Treena said. 

“Agreed,” Phasma said. “If you like someone, just tell them. There’s no reason for the guessing games.” 

“Yeah,” Treena said. “So, would you be interested in going out on a date some time?” 

Phasma whipped her head around to look at the tiny girl with the big eyes and the gloriously bright smirk. 

“Did you just ask me out?” Phasma asked, her mouth dropping open a bit.” 

“Absolutely,” Treena said. “Number swap?” 

“Of course,” Phasma said. She pulled out her phone and let Treena punch her number in while Phasma punched her own number into Treena’s phone. 

“You free tomorrow night?” Treena asked. 

“Absolutely,” Phasma said. “Dinner?” 

“Sounds great.” Treena’s smile really was something. Phasma felt her heart clench a bit. She couldn’t remember the last time it had been so easy for someone to just ask her out, but she appreciated it. 

“Okay everybody, gather around!” the adult in charge called. 

“Come on,” Treena said, grabbing Phasma’s hand. “Next time get here early enough to get a seat in the back.” 

Phasma saw the rest of the kids had gotten seats everywhere but the front row. Phasma let out a long suffering sigh and dropped into a seat next to Treena. A few seconds later Ren dropped down into a seat next to her. Phasma put her arm around his shoulders. Less than a second later, Ren had dropped his head on her shoulder. She nearly kissed the top of his head, but she restrained herself at the last second. She didn’t want to mess up all the careful work she’d put into her lipstick. She did give Ren’s shoulders a squeeze. 

Treena nudged her shoulder. Phasma turned to look at her, only to see Treena nodding toward Ren and Hux. Phasma turned back to look at them, doing a quick visual sweep to see what Treena was trying to make her see. A slow smirk settled onto Phasma’s mouth when she saw it. 

Hux and Ren were holding hands. Not only that, but Ren was clearly squeezing Hux’s hand. And Hux seemed to be squeezing back, probably to soothe Ren’s nerves. Hux could be such an ass, and then he did sweet things like that. It was ridiculous. 

The Youth Leader made his way to the front of the group. He seemed to choke on his own tongue when he saw them all in the front row. Phasma smirked at him and hugged Ren a little tighter. “What? You not used to people being so fashionable in your presence?” 

Treena slapped her hand over her mouth to keep from giggling. Hux wasn’t so lucky. He let a surprised snort, and also had to slap his hand over his mouth, but he had trouble containing his laughter behind his hand. Snorts and giggles escaped from between his fingers, but he made a valiant effort at keeping them in. 

Ren did no such thing. He turned his face and giggled into Phasma’s shoulder. He didn’t even seem to try and bother to stop laughing. Phasma grinned innocently and broadly. The Youth Minister looked terribly put out. Phasma had a hard time not laughing as well. She could hear other students laughing behind her. 

“Well,” the Youth Minister said, his voice very tentative. “If the artwork is to be believed, Jesus wore a dress too, so I suppose it’s okay.” 

Phasma starred openly at the man for about a second before the open laughter of the other kids caught up to her and she found herself doubled over with laughter. Ren ended up draped over her back, probably crying because of how hard he was laughing. Distantly, Phasma decided she was very glad that she’d put the waterproof make up on Ren. 

Maybe an evening at Hux’s lame church wouldn’t be that bad after all.

* * *

Hux wasn’t certain what he made of the success of that evening. The Youth Minister got a picture of the entire group dying of laughter and posted it on the Youth Blog. It was weird to see himself looking so open and laughing so hard. And he’d been holding Kylo’s hand the whole time. The other pictures that had gone up on the blog were from group discussion. One of the pictures was the little four person group of himself, Kylo, Phasma and Phasma’s new friend Treena. 

Hux remembered the photo fondly. He and Treena had gotten into a heated argument about the scripture they’d been assigned to talk about. Kylo had looked amused and he hadn’t let go of Hux’s hand. And Phasma had been laughing, her knees pressed against Kylo’s as she faced him. Her arm had been over the back of Treena’s chair. It was a good picture of them. 

Both pictures had made their way around the Conservative blogs. The reaction was mixed. Of course the reaction to Kylo’s dress was pretty bad, but it had been since the pictures of him in the school uniform started circulating. The pictures he’d taken with the girls in the bathroom had caused all kinds of furor… but mainly that he’d been in the girl’s bathroom. But the pictures of him actually in the Youth meeting left the bloggers split about down the middle. 

A portion rankly hated it. They saw Hux holding Kylo’s hand as a sign that The President’s son was stealing a good Conservative Senator’s son over to the dark side. That was clearly was his father thought. The welt on his back from his father’s belt attested to that. 

But others thought that it was good. Even with Ben Solo dressing strangely, at least he was going to an accepting place and he might turn his life around. Others thought that Hux getting both the President’s wayward son, and the infamous pop star to a church meeting was a good sign of Hux’s missions work. Really, Hux was a surprised as anyone that the Youth Minister had taken Kylo and Phasma’s looks in stride. 

For a moment it felt like he was back in his home church. They would have loved Kylo and Phasma. They would have loved them because Hux liked them so much. The pair of them would make a cute couple one day. They were obviously attached at the hip. Hux knew that with as cold and spiteful as he was that he was lucky he got their time of day. 

And Kylo really was beautiful. The thought of Kylo in that outfit was almost too much for him. He’d paid Treena to print out a copy of one of pictures Kylo had posted on Instagram. She surprised Hux and got him a group shot of Kylo in the bathroom as well as the single shot, and also the two from the Youth Blog. Hux shoved them inside one of his books, to be opened and looked at only when it was very late or he was certain his father wasn’t around. 

Hux looked at his phone again for the seventh time in the hour. Then he looked at his bookshelf again. His father’s rules felt more oppressive than normal. Hux had something like friends outside of this house. He had people who accepted that he was gay and yet still held his hand, or happily argued with him, or teased him. And Kylo had been so careful to make Hux happy when they’d kissed before. 

That thought made Hux’s chest ache. He couldn’t stand to drag this out any longer. 

He pulled up Phasma’s number and called. 

“You picked a good minute,” Phasma said, picking up instantly. “Grandpa just got me from my NA meeting.” 

“How did that go?” Hux asked, glancing at the clock on his computer. He didn’t have a lot of time, but he felt like he had to ask. Phasma had brought her 1 year clean chip to show them that day at school, and the tentative hope on her face reminded Hux all over again why he hated Phasma’s mother when he’d never even met her. Phasma was too young to be so proud of being a year clean from the drugs her mother had gotten her addicted to.

“I got to tell everyone that I was one year, six months clean today,” she chirped proudly. She’d told them that earlier in the day as well. 

“I’m proud of you for that,” Hux said. “That takes a lot of will and self-control.” 

“Thanks, Hux,” Phasma said. Hux was touched that she actually sounded grateful. 

“Were they happy for you? The people at the meeting?” Hux asked. 

“Yes,” she said. “Now I know you don’t have a lot of time. What’s up?” 

“We’re enacting the plan,” Hux said. “Is Saturday good for you?” 

“Yep. I have a photoshoot Friday after school, but I’m free Saturday. I’ll talk to Ren, kay?” 

“Thank you,” Hux said. 

“You want me to pick you up now?” Phasma offered. “I want someone to celebrate with. Grandpa said he’ll take us for ice cream.” 

“I…” Hux trailed off, looking at the clock. It was too late for that. It was only 7:30. He knew he’d be back before his 9 curfew. But he also knew that his father wasn’t going to let him out. He shifted a bit in his seat and winced. It had been days, but his back still ached. “Sorry. Maybe some afternoon?” 

“Yeah, I know it was a long shot. Anyway, I’m gonna call Treena. I think her family will let her out.” 

“Alright then,” Hux said. “Have a good evening.” 

“You too, Hux,” Phasma said. Then she hung up and Hux was left listening to dead air. 

Hux slowly lowered the phone and set it down. 

Saturday. Saturday was only a few days away and that would be the beginning and the end of this plan. He was making the first play, and his father would make the next, whatever that would be.

* * *

Phasma came over after her photoshoot Friday so that she could help him get ready to go for Saturday. He was very glad that Rey already had a playdate set for Saturday. It would have been a lot of trouble to explain to her why she couldn’t come with him and Phasma to the zoo, and his parents might have tried to make him take her. He was nervous enough as it was without having to try and have that fight. 

As it was, his parents had exchanged looks when he’d asked if he could go to the zoo with Hux and Phasma, and if Phasma could come over for the night before. They knew he was up to something, but they weren’t trying to stop him. He was glad for that. He just needed to get to the end of the day, and then everything would probably fall into place. 

It occurred to him while they were getting dressed in the morning that for all the planning they’d put into this day that they hadn’t planned for anything after that. That seemed a very un-Hux-ish thing to do, but Ren decided not to worry about it too much. Hux probably knew what he was doing and just hadn’t told them yet. For one thing, Ren could only focus on one thing at a time. 

It was the beginning of October in DC and some chill had begun to set in, and earlier this year than normal. It would be colder in the morning, but then they planned to be done by two, so Ren dressed to be cold and in layers he could shed. 

Phasma put the outfit together. Ren was glad she did, because he’d heard you couldn’t mix browns and black. She put him in a tight fitting pair of grey jeans that he hadn’t worn in a while which were no ripped from use and him having taken scissors to them in middle school. They fit him perfectly, and the black stockings he wore under would keep his legs warm. He had brown walking boots and a grey button up that Phasma had Ren button all the way up to his neck, where it fit loosely. He knew Hux would like it. 

Over that was an oversized brown sweater that went to about mid-thigh on Ren like it was actually a dress. The sweater had a deep v-neck, which meant the button up got to show. She topped it off with a thick black knit scarf, which he had to wrap around his neck since she’d pulled his hair up into a messy bun. Phasma topped the look off with the burgundy lipstick Ren liked so much and a smoky eye. 

He felt awesome when he looked in the mirror. He was masculine and feminine and his black purse went with the outfit without clashing with the brown like he’d assumed. Also, it meant he would be comfortable outside.

Even Phasma had dressed for the weather. Yes, her pants had sequins on them and she was still walking around in green heels, but she had picked a cream button up and a green sweater that didn’t exactly match her shoes, but according to Phasma “went together”. She told him her make-up was “nude”. She’d topped that off with a brown scarf, gloves and a real live brown fedora. Ren had gotten pictures wearing it too. He’d never seen a fedora in real life before. 

The trip to the zoo was occupied by a tense silence. Ren wasn’t surprised. They were all about to be thrust deep into the public eye. While Phasma still worked occasionally, she hadn’t been in the public eye for a while like she was about to be again. And Hux had never, ever been in the public eye like he was about to be. 

Ren thought about maybe warning Hux, but then he realized that Hux really would have thought it all out. He suggested this plan for whatever reason, and Hux didn’t just jump headlong into things without thinking about it first. Which just made the fact that Hux hadn’t planned out what happened after the public kiss with them all the more disturbing. 

“Hello you two,” Hux said, walking over to them after they got inside the zoo. He was in his regular Mormon clothes with the addition of a jacket. “Do you want to see the animals first or…” 

“It’s gonna take a half hour before the paparazzi show up,” Phasma said. “My agent leaked for them to find me by the lions.” 

“Well, in that case, I want to see the otters,” Ren said. He grabbed both Phasma and Hux’s hands and dragged them along the path toward the otters. Rey was absolutely going to want pictures with him and the otters. 

For a sweet twenty five minutes they were able to put aside everything and focus just on each other and the animals. They all got pictures together, including one of Phasma kissing Hux’s cheek, which was quickly saved as Ren’s phone background. 

Then they got to the end of the trail, toward where the lions were and Ren started to feel anxious. Of course he and Hux would pretend to be boyfriends for a while, but how long was ‘a while’? They didn’t have a set time. Would Hux stop talking to him after that? It wasn’t like Hux had a lot of friends. It would hurt terribly if Hux picked being alone to hanging out with Ren. It would kill Ren is that happened. 

Ren couldn’t even think about Phasma leaving him. She was the best friend he’d ever had and she wasn’t even his real friend. But she made him feel safe and happy. She sang songs with his little sister and helped him through his terror about picking outfits and applying make-up. He didn’t know what he’d do if he never saw her again. 

“Okay, it’s about time,” Phasma said all too soon. 

“Really” Ren asked, he couldn’t help but sound nervous. 

“Yeah, I’ve seen some paps sneaking up for a while now,” Phasma whispered. “You two go scoot down the path. I’m going to pose looking at the lions. Just make certain you’re in the way of the cameras when you start making out.” 

“Yes Ma’am,” Hux said. He took Ren’s hand and tugged him along. 

It was a cold day, for early October, but Hux’s hands were warm even though Ren’s were a pair of ice cubes. It almost hurt for Hux to touch him. And Hux winced when he felt Ren’s hand. But he still kept hold into they got a little away. 

“So, how do you want to do this?” Ren said. “I mean, I know this isn’t really you’re think and all. So do you wanna just jump into it? Or do you want your ears bit again? Or is there something else-”

Ren was shut up by Hux’s lips suddenly pressed to his. There was a moment of shock, and then Ren just melted into it. It was as good as he remembered it being. 

Hux pulled away and Ren knew his own eyes had to be huge. He knew he was staring at Hux. But Hux looked so amazing. He was so amazing. Ren wished they were really kissing and that they were really dating for real. 

His chest felt like it was just going to rip itself apart at that thought. 

“You talk too much,” Hux said. 

“Shut me up again?” Ren asked, beginning to smile. “You have my lipstick on your lips.” 

“Well, at least we won’t be able to pretend we weren’t kissing,” Hux said. “Don’t you dare kiss my ears!” 

Ren found himself laughing loudly. He wrapped his arms around Hux and started placing kisses all over Hux’s pale cheeks while Hux started shouting at him to stop it. Ren continued to do that for a moment before he finally grabbed Hux’s earlobe with his teeth and started to suck. 

Hux became jelly in his arms and Ren had to tighten his grip to keep Hux standing up. He really, really likedd his ears nibbled on. Ren was completely going to exploit that later. 

He sucked and nibbled for a moment longer before he pulled back, smirking like a cat. “Now look whose shut up button I found.” 

Hux grabbed him by his ears and dragged him into a kiss. Well a series of kisses, but Ren wasn’t going to quibble about terms. Kissing Hux was everything he remembered, but now they were in each other’s arms, and every time Ren could pull away a little he got to see all the burgundy lipstick all over Hux’s face. 

“My, my, you boys make a show,” Phasma said. 

“Ren, you made me sticky,” Hux whined. 

“That’s what she said,” Phasma crooned. She pulled out her phone and snapped a picture of the two of them. Ren beamed. 

“Can you send that to me later?” Ren chirped. 

“I hate you both so much,” Hux groaned. 

“Come on, let’s get you two cleaned up,” she said, beginning to steer them toward the bathrooms. 

“Did the paps see us?” Ren asked quietly. 

“Absolutely. Hux started screaming like an idiot and everyone saw you two,” Phasma said, rolling her eyes. 

“Then where are the paps? I thought we might have gotten mobbed,” Ren said. 

“Nah, your Secret Service Detail basically dropped from the sky and shooed the paps away,” Phasma said. “But yeah, that’s going to be everywhere by tonight.” 

“Perfect,” Hux said. And really, he looked so good smirking like that when he had lipstick all over his face. Ren leaned over and nipped Hux’s ear. Hux shivered, just like Ren was hoping for. 

It was perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! We have reached the approximate half way point. 
> 
> First of all, I want to say that Treena is based on Phasma's wife in [Laeti Vescimur Nos Subacturis](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5823733/chapters/13421281). 
> 
> Also, I want to encourage you to read my FinnRey Fic [Hold My Hand](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6056262). It's set after the events of this fic, but there aren't any spoilers except that this story has a happy ending (of course). 
> 
> Thanks guys. Next chapter will be up hopefully in the not too distant future!
> 
> Edit: I forgot in my exhaustion last night to include a link to the fanart azirafail drew me! [Here](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/139981994970/robinasnyder-azira-fail-some-high-school-au). This includes Kylo Ren in his first skirt outfit that fit the reference picture I was using so close it's kinda amazing! It looks so good, go see!


	8. Chapter 8

The pictures were everywhere by Sunday. Ren got a blissful, peaceful night of sleep before his parents found out. Honestly it was a bit embarrassing that it had taken his mother’s media team so long to find out. By the time his mother knew it had been out for about twenty four hours and it was on basically every news station there was for it to be on. 

“Is the President’s Son Gay?” many of the headlines read. “President’s Son Makes Out with Conservative’s Son”. “Lovebirds at the Zoo”. “Ben Organa-Solo No Longer Solo”. “The President’s Son Takes After his Uncle”. 

Ren’s going to have some of them framed. His favorite said “While Mother’s Not Watching” above a huge picture of him and Hux locking lips. He’d already printed out a bunch of them and considered if he should scrapbook them by the time someone came to get him. 

He couldn’t say he was exactly gleeful about this meeting. It was really, really bad when someone came to take him to his parents. They only did that when they were very angry and it was going to be a long, long talk. His father had read somewhere that for really bad talks it was better to not have the discussions in a child’s room, something about negative association with what was supposed to be a safe space. Ren was pretty certain it was bullshit.

Still, he was taken to the assigned chastisement sitting room. His parents were already where. His mother was sitting at the table, looking over the headline articles that someone had cut out or printed out for her. His father was standing up reading some of the printed pages. He looked up when Ren was let in the room. His mother didn’t. 

Ren knew this was bad, but he was having a hard time not giggling. This really was what he’d wanted. They couldn’t ignore him or pretend like what he thought or did was just some childish prank that didn’t matter. He had power. He could do this too. 

“You wanted to see me?” Ren asked, doing his very to look innocent. He imagined he was probably smirking. He heard the door shut behind him. He winced a bit at that. Yelling was probably going to be involved. 

“Do you want to tell us something, Son?” his father asked, raising a brow. 

“Not particularly,” Ren said. 

“I’d wondered what you were up to, but oh boy, even the worst thing I was imagining wasn’t as stupid as this,” his father said, tossing the papers down on the sofa. “You have any idea what kind of trouble you’ve caused.” 

Ren felt a bit incensed. “Uncle Luke is gay.” 

“This is not about that!” his father snapped. 

“It isn’t? It’s not about that I’m different and it’s not good for poll numbers?” Ren snapped right back. 

“Of course not,” his mother said calmly, cutting right through the argument. Ren shivered a bit. Her cool, clear voice spelled all kinds of trouble. She still hadn’t looked up from the papers she’d been looking over, though. 

“What’s wrong with me kissing someone?” Ren demanded, putting more bravado in his voice than he really felt. 

“It’s not about you kissing a boy or a girl,” his mother said. She glanced up at him, though her head was still bent over the papers. “It’s about how this was posed. This was on purpose. This involved the camera’s favorite pop star. This was about making the media work itself into a frenzy. If it wasn’t so stupid I’d be impressed by how effective it is.” 

“Hux and I are dating! There’s nothing wrong with us kissing when we’re dating,” Ren insisted. 

His mother sighed and looked up fully. She examined him for a moment before she pushed herself up and stood. “You’re not dating.” 

Ren felt his face start to heat up. They weren’t, but he wanted them to be. Still, he stuck to his guns. “Yes, we are!” 

“No, you aren’t,” she said, still sounding cool and calm. “You’re pretending for plausible deniability. But you and I and your friends and your father all know that this was staged. You aren’t dating Brendol Hux Jr. But you did drag him into something very dangerous.” 

Now Ren knew he was really red. “I didn’t drag him into anything. He knew what he was doing.” 

“Coming out publically in a way that would humiliate his father and possibly cost him all clout and re-election. You’ve met Senator Hux. Does he seem like a man who would take such a thing lightly?” 

His mother’s voice was so calm, but Ren felt his stomach flip right over. Hux’s father was a mean man. But would he really hurt Hux? “Will he hurt Hux?” Ren demanded, not quite able to keep the terror from his voice. 

“I have no idea,” his mother said. “But if you’d really cared about him you wouldn’t have put him in a position where it was a possibility.” 

“No,” Ren said defiantly. He trusted Hux. “He always thinks everything through. Hux is really smart. He wouldn’t walk into anything without knowing exactly what could happen. He wouldn’t kiss me in public if he thought he’d get really hurt. He wouldn’t.” 

His voice sounded so weak, though. Because Hux did plan for everything, but he hadn’t planned anything out with them for what happened after they came out. 

…No, Hux knew what he was doing. He wouldn’t do any of this without a plan. Ren set his face. He wasn’t going to doubt Hux, not on this. 

“The kid is smart,” his father cut in. “But he’s still just that, a kid. For whatever reason he walked into this, but he’s got no real idea about the media furor. Neither do you, for that matter. You’ve seen how they talk about your mother. But for once it’s all going to be directed at you. Everyone you know is going to be talking about you. They’re going to talk about how you dress, how you act, how you talk. They’re going to want to know if you coming out was for political reasons, or if you did it to cause us problems. They’re going to be thinking and asking and wondering about you. You’ve painted a target on your back and on his.” 

Ren felt the warmth leave his face. “They wouldn’t care about how I dress,” he whispered. “They only do that for girls.” 

“Well, you dress like a girl now,” his mother said. “A very fashionable one at that. I’m certain your friend Phasma is a wonderful stylist.” 

“She’s not my friend,” Ren said bitterly. “Neither is Hux.” 

“What?” his father asked, sounding genuinely surprised. 

Ren felt pressure behind his eyes. “They aren’t my friends… they’re just… it was just a plan. They aren’t my friends. I don’t have friends.” 

“But they’re over all the time,” Han said. “You talk about them all the time.” 

“So?” Ren asked, his voice cracking. He looked down at his feet. “I want them to be my friends, but it was just a plan. We’ll finish it out and then they’ll probably go back to their own lives and I’ll still be here.” 

He couldn’t continue. He squeezed his eyes shut tight and tried to block out the feelings. He wanted Phasma and Hux to be his friends. But he knew that outside of a limited time frame, or the obligations of family that he was actually unlovable. 

He felt the needed, but not exactly unexpected press of arms around him from both his parents. He turned and pressed his face into his mom’s shoulder and let his tears out. 

“You weren’t kidding when you said you didn’t have friends, were you, Kid?” his dad asked. He sounded so sad. 

“No,” Ren whispered. 

He felt their arms tighten and he let out a chocked off sob. The hug only got tighter. The next time he sobbed he didn’t bother to try and hide it or cut it off. He just let it out. He’d been so lonely for so long and finally he wasn’t and he had no hope that he’d get to keep what he had for much longer. 

At least his family loved him. They didn’t get him, but he knew that they wouldn’t walk away from him or send him away. They’d done everything they could for his grandfather, and they’d had every reason to hate him and never want to see him again. If nothing else in his life worked out, he’d still be able to keep this. 

He let himself cry for a while. Eventually his mother pulled away. She left him in his father’s strong embrace for a few moments while Ren sniffled into his father’s shirt. When she returned she had a damp cloth, which she used to wash his face. His eyes stung a little les badly when she finished. In a way he felt better and in a way he felt worse. 

“I’m not sorry for kissing Hux,” he said. 

“You don’t have to be sorry for kissing him,” his mother said. “But you should be for causing him so much trouble.” 

“It was his idea,” Ren said. 

“That doesn’t mean you should have gone along with it,” his father said. “If you wanted to cause problems with the campaign, the dresses are much better for that. This was unnecessary.” 

“How I dress isn’t about that,” Ren snapped, his voice starting to rise.

“Enough,” his mother said gently. Ren turned to look at her. He willed her to tell his father off, and to tell Ren that he looked good in his skirts. He wanted her to, but he also wasn’t surprised when she didn’t. “You did cause us problems, and you did it on purpose.” 

“Of course,” Ren said. 

“So we’re grounding you,” she said. “You can’t go to anything outside of school for the next month… although I suppose it would be alright if you have your… if you bring them over.” 

The sympathy in her tone grated at him, but he was grateful. He wasn’t going to get to have Hux or Phasma in his life for much longer. He wanted to get as much out of them as he could. 

“Um… can I still do the Youth thing with Hux? I mean, it’s not like exactly fun, but he likes it better when he’s not alone, and I’d like to keep going while he wants me there,” Ren explained. 

His father huffed out a laugh. “I don’t think I’d have ever imagined you’d ask to go to Church… so yeah, what the hell, I don’t see the problem. Leia?” 

Both he and his father looked at his mother. She looked considering for a moment before she too nodded. 

“I don’t see the harm in it. Certainly you can’t cause any more damage by going,” she said. 

“You just think it’ll look good for the campaign,” Ren accused. 

“Kid, you’re getting what you want, don’t complain,” his father said. 

Ren ducked his head a bit. His father had a point. He was lucky, he was aware, to not have been on total lock down. And his parents allowed him to negotiate on his punishment. He was very lucky. 

“Sorry,” he murmured. 

“Alright,” his mother said. “We are going to spin this. You are going to go back to your room and do your homework and not touch your video games. Understood?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” Ren said instantly. 

“Good, now go,” his mother said. 

Ren walked back to his room on his own. When he arrived he had one split second where he considered bringing up Halo. But he quickly dismissed that thought and went to get his textbooks. He would be in huge trouble if someone caught him. 

Plus, he’d still get to see Hux and Phasma for a while. He didn’t want to jeopardize that. 

He cracked open his textbooks and dragged his phone over. He sent Phasma a text. ‘Parents are pretty pissed, but they only grounded me from outside stuff. I can still have people over.’ 

‘Ah, the damage control grounding. They’ll let you back out again when they think you probably won’t try to screw them over.’ Phasma’s response came pretty fast. 

‘How long does that normally last for you?’ 

‘Mom’s memory is shot. She tends to forget that she grounded me, especially if I make sure to get her drunk when she’s trying to ground me.’

Ren’s stomach twisted at that thought. ‘Does she use around you?’

‘Yeah, but that’s when I tend to leave the house.’

‘You can come here if you need somewhere to go then.’

‘Thanks, but I normally go to my grandparents. Besides. You shouldn’t offer something you aren’t certain you can follow up on.’

Ren scowled and tapped out a quick reply. ‘I promise you that if I told them why you were coming over that they’d make certain a guest room was set up to be your room and they’d let you come and go as often as you wanted.’ 

He put the phone down and started to try and concentrate on homework. It almost worked, but then his phone started to ring. He answered without looking at who was calling him, assuming it was Phasma. 

“You know, the whole grounding thing means I’m probably not supposed to be on my phone,” Ren said. 

“Oh,” Hux said. “Is… this a bad time?” 

Ren’s stomach dropped out. He’d never heard Hux sound so scared and nervous before in his life. 

“What’s wrong?” Ren said. 

“Nothing,” Hux said quickly. 

“No, you tell me what’s wrong,” Ren said. “You don’t have time to pussyfoot around this.”

Hux snorted. “I’m afraid I have much more time than I used to.” 

Ren’s stomach flipped over. Hux sounded all wrong, and Ren couldn’t figure out why exactly. “Hux?” 

“I’m outside at the gate, and the guard won’t let me in. Can you call him and tell him to let me in?” Hux asked. 

“Yes, yes. Just hold on,” Ren said. He hung up and called his Secret Service contact. They’d call the man at the gate to let Hux in. 

Once Ren finished with that call he bolted out of his room. He was going to go out and meet Hux and see what was going on. Hux wasn’t so impulsive to just show up. Something was really wrong. At the very least Hux should have called before he left the house. 

“Hey! Where you going, Kid?” his dad called from down the hall. 

Ren halted awkwardly in his running. He wanted to keep going, but he needed his parents to not fight him on this. He took a deep breath. It was only then that he realized he felt like he was going to cry again. He swallowed hard. He couldn’t give in to his fear yet. 

“Hux called. He’s outside, he needed to be let in,” Ren said. “Dad, he’d never, ever just show up. There’s something really wrong. He shouldn’t have even be let out of the house, let alone be here!” 

Ren tried to keep from breaking into tears again. He could feel himself start to shake. There was terror crawling up his throat, trying to escape. But he was trying not to show it. His father’s eyes got hard and he strode down the hall toward Ren. Ren started to shake harder. He could tell without asking that his dad believed him.

“Okay, Kid. I’ll go with you,” his dad said. 

“Thank you,” Ren whispered. 

He turned and headed back down the hall. This time he walked rather than ran. He felt badly jittery. He wanted to take off in a sprint, but he also knew that Hux wasn’t going to be there even if he walked slowly down the hall. 

They arrived at the entrance way and Ren started to pace back and forth, waiting for Hux to be allowed in. He could see the guards waiting for someone to arrive. The door opened and Ren froze, staring at Hux as he was escorted in. 

His father sucked in a breath behind him. Hux’s left eye was swollen shut and his bottom lip was cut up. There was a large bruise on the left side of his face and he walked in with a limp. 

“There’s no need for that,” his father said when the guards started to try and take the book bag and duffle bag that Hux was carrying with him to search them. “Just let him in.” 

“Sir,” the guard said, stepping away from Hux. 

Hux squared his shoulders and walked forward as proudly as he could with that limp. But when he got close enough, Ren dragged him into a gentle hug. 

“Are you okay?” Ren asked. 

“My father decided that he couldn’t have his son being gay,” Hux said quietly. He pulled away and he wouldn’t look at Ren. He did glance at Ren’s father with mistrust. 

“Is he the one who gave you shiner?” his father asked. 

“Yes,” Hux said. He dropped his gaze down to the carpet. 

“Okay, we’re going to call a doctor and get you set up in a guest room,” Ren’s father said. “Let me take those bags for yours. Ben, why don’t you take him to your room? I’ll send for someone to bring ice.” 

Hux looked up. He looked surprised. “You don’t have to-” he started. 

“No, I absolutely have to. You’re under age and there’s no way I’m going to let you wander around outside with nowhere to go. Plus, you’re dating my son. So that makes you sort of like family. Now give me that bag.” 

Hux stared at Ren’s father for another moment before he relinquished his hold on the duffle bag. He winced while he did so. Ren walked behind Hux and helped him take his book bag off. He slung the book bag over his own shoulders and took Hux’s hand. 

“Come on,” Ren said. He gave Hux’s hand a gentle squeeze. He didn’t see any bruises on Hux’s hands, but he didn’t want to give Hux any more pain when he already looked so hurt. 

He guided Hux silently back to his room. Hux barely made any noise at all as they walked. When they got inside Ren helped Hux over to sit on the bed. He set Hux’s things down and went to sit with him. 

“What happened?” he asked quietly. 

‘“My father was furious that I’m gay,” Hux whispered back. “I want to thank you for this. I know this wasn’t part of the plan.” 

“Screw the plan,” Ren whispered. “Look at what it got you. I shouldn’t have said yes. You wouldn’t have gotten hurt if I hadn’t agreed to this.” He was still speaking quietly, but he began to get louder out of agitation. 

“That’s not true,” Hux said, still whispering. “If I hadn’t put myself in the public eye by kissing you, he would have actually, honestly killed me. I knew that if I became a very public face that he wouldn’t risk it. And maybe we could work it out. You saved my life, Kylo.” 

Ren felt the blood drain from his face. Could that be true? Could a father kill his own child for being gay? Certainly Hux Sr was a dick, but a murderer? 

Hux seemed like he believed it, though. And Hux knew his father better than Ren did.   
“Knock, knock,” his mother said, knocking on Ren’s open door. 

Ren turned and looked at her. She had a bag of peas and a cloth in her hands, which she walked over, offering them to Hux. 

“Thank you, ma’am,” Hux said in a quiet voice. “I appreciate you allowing me to stay here. I understand I have caused you a lot of trouble and-”

“That’s enough,” his mother said in a gentle voice. She walked to Ren’s desk and grabbed his chair, dragging it so she could sit near Ren and Hux. “My husband tells me that your father has thrown you out. Is that correct?” 

“Yes,” Hux said. “I would appreciate it if you could let me stay a few days while I figure out what to do.” 

“Nonsense,” Ren’s mother said. “You’ll stay here with us until we either get voted out or you graduate.” 

“Really, mom?” Ren asked, pleased but not surprised that his parents would offer that. He was grateful that his faith wasn’t misplaced. 

“I don’t mean to put you out like that,” Hux protested quickly. 

“You’re not,” Ren said. “We have a ton of space here. It will be easy enough to turn a guest room into a bedroom. And you can go to school with me and Rey in the morning.” 

“Yes,” his mother said. “Now, I need to know if you were able to get everything you wanted of your things when you left. And I need to know if you got your birth certificate and social security card.” 

“I didn’t, and I don’t. I grabbed a few books, some clothes, and my phone and charger. My mom slipped me some bus money,” Hux said. Ren saw him nudge his tongue against the cut on his lip for a moment while he considered his next words. “You will really let me stay?” 

“Yes,” Ren’s mother said. “We’re having a doctor come to look at you. Would you like to press charges against your father?” 

“Yes,” Hux said quickly, sitting up even straighter, if that was possible. Hux’s posture was always perfect. “They’ll take pictures, right? For evidence?” 

“Yes,” Ren’s mother said. Her expression was grim. “We’ll have the police come to speak with you tonight, alright? In the morning you boys can stay home from school and we’ll go and get your things. Alright?” 

Hux looked surprised again. He looked down at his knees and nodded. “Thank you. I’m sorry for what I did, that it may have caused you issue.” 

“I’m not,” Ren’s mother said. “It got you here now, and that’s where you need to be. Now, hold these peas on your face. I’m going to go make a few phone calls. Will you two be okay alone for a moment?” 

“Yeah, I won’t let anything happen to him,” Ren assured her. 

When she looked at him, Ren could have sworn he saw pride in her eyes. She stood and nodded and left them alone. 

“They just… like that… will they really let me stay?” Hux asked. 

“Well, as far as they’re concerned, you’re my boyfriend, they don’t want to make me unhappy,” Ren said. Then he blushed a bit. It made no sense for him to lie like that.

But Hux nodded like that made perfect sense to him. There was one moment after that when Ren thought he should correct himself, tell Hux it was a joke or something. But Ren didn’t. He just let it sit there. 

This way, Hux might keep dating him for a while longer. Even if it wasn’t real dating.

* * *

Hux was exhausted by the time he was able to go to bed. The doctor had gone through some detailed record keeping and had stitched him up and put Hux through a portable x-ray. He was glad that he didn’t have to leave the White House. There were tons of armed guards everywhere. His father, if he changed his mind and decided to actually kill his son, still wouldn’t be able to get to him. It was safe in the White House. 

The doctor had been very professional. Hux got his wounds documented for the police file, but he also got tended to and got some nice painkillers. Ms Organa made certain that he got a sandwich between the doctor’s visit and the police. 

The police had asked him a ton of questions about everything. He’d sat with the police alone, not wanting to tell those things to the Organas, even though all of them, even Kylo’s little sister, offered to sit with him through the process. The police had grilled him on details, but Hux was used to standing up under his father’s scrutiny, which was much worse. Also, Hux didn’t have to tell a lie. He told the truth about his father’s attack; about being afraid that his father might kill him; about his mother trying to jump between them but getting hit for her trouble. 

Hux didn’t tell them about believing his father would kill him even before the attack. He didn’t tell them that he knew his mother wasn’t going to leave his father, even though the evidence that the police had now would be ample proof for a divorce. He didn’t tell them that he knew he’d be living with the Organas for the foreseeable future. 

He did tell them about his father’s past abuse and his controlling tendencies. At least there would be his words on record somewhere. 

When the questioning was over there was dinner. It was comfort food, mostly fried and there was mac and cheese and a very southern kind of cuisine. Hux had a moment where he’d had trouble not bursting into tears. It reminded him of Sunday afternoon lunches at his home church. 

The Organa family was too Northeastern for the food to mean that much to them. It wasn’t a coincidence. Someone had asked the chefs to make food that would make Hux feel better. Honestly, he didn’t know what to do with that kind of kindness. The only time he’d ever gotten anything like that had been at his home church, and that had mostly been because there were people who loved his mother. 

Also, he didn’t want to think how much the members of his home church might hate him now that he’d come out like he did. 

At least the Organas wouldn’t let him be homeless. Even if it was only because they were trying to keep Kylo happy. Kylo wouldn’t throw him out. He was good like that. 

After dinner Hux had brushed his teeth, changed into his pajamas and climbed into the new bed he’d been given. His room was near Rey and Kylo’s. Hux was surprised how quickly a storage room had been cleaned and turned into a beautiful, functional bedroom. Ms Organa assured him he could decorate it however he wanted. 

Hux knew he wouldn’t. He’d never let his room get cluttered like Kylo’s. He wouldn’t say that out loud, because then Kylo would try and make him watch a lot of things and make him like things. Kylo would want him to want to collect things he liked for his room. And Hux was a little afraid that he was too old to learn to like things. A part of him thought that his father had already beaten out of him the ability to be normal and to want to put up posters and have action figures. 

It wasn’t something he wanted to explore that much. 

It was a nice room, too. It was in the White House, after all. Hux smirked, thinking how jealous and angry his father was going to be. Hux knew his father had always wished that he could be President, but with how unpopular he was with the party and his slipping poll numbers, it was unlikely that he’d even get a second term. 

And here his fag son was, sleeping in the White House. Hux was going to be living in the White house. 

It wasn’t too much of a comfort, but it was a satisfying thought. 

But those thoughts didn’t fill the big empty room. It was too quiet. It wasn’t like Hux was used to a lot of noise. But he was very aware that nothing around him was familiar at all, and he would never get to go back to what was familiar. No one in the building really knew him. 

No one except Kylo. 

That thought had him out of bed, out the door and down the hall in nothing flat. He ended up knocking on Kylo’s door and tapping his foot impatiently. It was late, but Hux was certain that Kylo would be up playing video games because they weren’t going to school in the morning. 

He wasn’t surprised when Ren opened the door wearing a ratty tee shirt and boxers. He wasn’t surprised the way Ren blushed. The squeak Ren let out was a pleasant surprise, though. 

“What are you doing here?” Ren hissed. 

“My bed’s too big. Can I stay here?” Hux found himself asking. Inwardly he winced, but outwardly his face remained stoic like this was a completely normal request. 

Kylo blinked at him for a moment and then stepped aside without a word. Hux stepped in and Kylo shut the door behind him. 

“You weren’t playing games?” Hux asked, seeing the monitors were off. 

“No. I was texting Phasma about what happened today. She says you can stay with her grandparents too, that she asked them and they said you were welcome.” 

“They don’t know me,” Hux said in frustration. He turned around and looked at Ren. “Why do people keep being nice when they don’t know me?” Hell, even when they knew him, they had no reason to be nice. Hux considered himself singularly horrible.

“Maybe it has something to do with the fact that you’re fifteen and homeless. And that you’re… you know, our friend, and adults want to help their kids’ friends,” Kylo said, sounding totally exasperated. 

“Whatever,” Hux said, heading for the bed. His feet were cold. “And it’s not like we’re really friends. It’s just a convenience thing.” 

“Yeah,” Kylo said quietly. 

Hux climbed into bed. It was warm there, like that’s where Kylo had been. Hux let out a content sigh, getting his toes somewhere warm. He was about to lay down when he saw that Kylo was still standing by the door. 

“What?” Hux asked. 

“I thought the fact that you came right here meant that maybe you thought we were friends,” Kylo said. “I don’t know, that you trusted me to help you, because that’s what friends do.” 

“You’re a good guy,” Hux said. “You wouldn’t have thrown me out… look, I’m sorry that I used you like that and got you in trouble with your parents.” 

“Jesus, Hux!” Kylo snapped. “Don’t apologize for doing what you needed to do to not be murdered. Are you fucking kidding me? I’d rather you have gotten me beaten than have you be murdered. And for the record I like kissing you. And even if I didn’t like kissing you, I just like you to begin with. You and Phasma are the best friends I’ve ever had and neither of you are even my real-” Kylo’s voice cracked. He took a shuddery breath and licked his lips. “My real friends.” 

Hux knew his eyes were wide. It was insane to hear Kylo saying that. It was insane that Kylo looked so crushed that Hux… what? Didn’t want to be his friend. Hux felt terribly uncomfortable. He was actually in Kylo’s bed, in Kylo’s house because Kylo was safe and Hux was lonely. 

“Phasma adores you,” Hux said. “I don’t know why you’d think you two aren’t friends. I’ve never seen two people be closer than you are. You even go on shopping trips together.” 

“It’s just to fill her time until she gets bored and finds a way to go back to military school,” Kylo muttered, looking down at the carpet. 

Hux scoffed. “Oh please. You don’t need to do the self-pity routine. It’s not attractive at all.” 

“It’s not like you like me anyway,” Kylo muttered, looking away. 

Hux let out a long suffering sigh. “I said we weren’t friends because I’m a mean, nasty, terrible person and I couldn’t imagine you’d really want me around. I didn’t say it because I didn’t like you… I wish we were friends.” 

“Really?” Kylo asked. He actually met Hux’s gaze, and he looked so damned hopeful. Hux’s stomach started to tie itself into interesting knots. No one should ever look at Hux like he was what they wanted. Hux regretted making Kylo think that Hux was good enough to be friends with. He wasn’t. But now that Kylo thought it, Hux couldn’t stand to turn him away. 

“Yeah, really. Now come to bed. I’m freezing,” Hux said. He laid down and quickly cuddled under the blankets. 

Kylo laughed, a sound that made Hux shiver happily. He bounded into bed and under the covers, practically wrapping himself around Hux. Hux had no idea how Kylo could be that warm when he had nothing on his legs and the room was so cold. 

“You set it this cold, don’t you?” Hux accused. 

“It’s not my fault your too warm blooded, you stupid red neck,” Kylo said. He sounded so wonderfully fond. And Kylo was hugging him, which was an amazing feeling. 

“Shut up, you damn yank,” Hux murmured. 

Hux snuggled into Kylo angular body. It wasn’t anything Hux was used to. He’d never shared a bed before, except for the last sleep over. But then he’d spent the whole night on the edge of the bed for the sake of propriety and Kylo’s comfort. Now he was wrapped in Kylo. But honestly it was very nice. It was nice to feel Kylo just breathe and exist right up against Hux. 

Hux fell asleep like that. And while he mostly homeless, without his family, and sore all over, he was also a little less lonely than when he’d started the day. That wasn’t a bad way to end a day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all again! 
> 
> I want to encourage you all again to read my FinnRey Fic [Hold My Hand](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6056262). It's set after the events of this fic, but there aren't any spoilers except that this story has a happy ending (of course). 
> 
> I also want to link some wonderful art!
> 
> Last time I initially forgot to add art! 
> 
> The lovely azira-fail has drawn two pieces based on the fic [The first, including Kylo Ren in his first skirt outfit!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/139981994970/robinasnyder-azira-fail-some-high-school-au).   
> [Some Lovely Headshots](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140262018520/more-of-robinasnyders-high-school-au-bc-i-am).  
> [Said Love Headshots in color!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140313167665/buncha-teenage-losers-and-bonus-man-bun-kylo)
> 
> The lovely idleart made this super nice [piece of art of Hux and Ren](http://idleart.tumblr.com/post/140523637692/i-was-gonna-color-this-more-but-who-has-the-energy).
> 
> Also steamworkblue made this piece [here](http://steamworkblue.tumblr.com/post/140673220951/i-swear-its-not-a-phase-mom-go-read-this-it), which is inspired by the fic and discussions we've had. 
> 
> I also need to thank steamworkblue specifically for getting me the information I needed about Non-Binary and Genderqueer. I know a lot of you have asked if Ren is NB. I didn't want to say no because I knew so many people identified with the story. I also didn't want to say yes when I hadn't done any research into NB. steamworkblue talked me through things, and I can now state Ren's labels. 
> 
> Kylo Ren is a bisexual demiboy.   
> Hux is gay.  
> Phasma is an asexual lesbian. 
> 
> steamworkblue also got me thinking about some of the other characters in this universe. Not everyone really knows their labels. Ren may never be self aware enough in this story to call himself a demiboy. But I have made a list and a conscious decision about how I'll write certain characters in the future. 
> 
> Final note! 
> 
> I super, duper appreciate the fanart! I really do! but pleeeeeease tell me when you make any art work for the fic. I want to link it in the notes. I want to know about its existence. I love talking to people. My tumblr is the literal same as my AO3. Please message me a link. 
> 
> Thank you!


	9. Chapter 9

Hux woke up tangled in Kylo’s ridiculous limbs. At first he didn’t know why he’d woken. He still felt pretty tired, and he was in a warm bed, but he wasn’t too warm. He was comfortable. He didn’t have to pee badly enough to actually wake up and go. It wasn’t even very bright in Ren’s room because of those ridiculous black out curtains. 

Maybe kylo had bumped him? Hux shifted just enough to look at Kylo. He had his mouth open, but he wasn’t snoring. The room was pretty quiet actually. Kylo did not make a pretty picture in the morning. His morning breath was awful. And he’d probably been drooling and his hair was everywhere. But it was such a Kylo way to sleep that Hux felt really fond. 

“Good, one of you is awake,” a voice said. 

Hux whipped his head around to see who was speaking. To his horror he saw that it was Kylo’s mother. She was standing over them, watching the two of them be wrapped up in sleep. 

No wonder Hux had woken up. He had a finely tuned sense of when people were watching him. It had saved him many bruises in the past.

He tightened his grip on Kylo. He knew his eyes were wide. Logically he knew that Kylo’s parents weren’t against Kylo liking boys. Hell, Kylo’s uncle was very visibly out and very visibly married to another man. But they’d given Hux a room and Hux had ignored the implication that he was to stay there. Would Kylo get in trouble for this? If she said anything, Hux would just have to say he snuck in. 

“Easy,” the Kylo’s mother murmured. “I didn’t mean to interrupt your puppy pile. Just wake Ben up and tell him breakfast is ready and we need to be ready to leave in a half hour. Understand?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” Hux said quickly, though still softly. He hugged Kylo a little closer. He wanted to keep Kylo safe. Kylo was the only friend he had, and Hux wasn’t going to risk that.

“Good,” she said. “He’ll show you were the dining room is.” Then she turned and slipped out, leaving the door open behind her. 

Hux stayed still for a while, breathing hard and trying to make his heart stop pounding. He was still holding tight onto Kylo. The idiot still hadn’t woken up. Kylo’s mother didn’t appear angry, but that never meant anything. She didn’t have to look angry to be angry. Sometimes his father’s worst outbursts came when he didn’t even appear angry. 

“Kylo,” Hux whispered, starting to shake Kylo. Kylo closed his mouth and snuggled more into Hux. That made Hux stop for a moment. Kylo felt so safe with Hux; that was obvious. Kylo looked so good asleep like that. He was beautiful and touchable and perfect. 

“Kylo,” Hux said. He ran his fingers through Kylo’s hair. That seemed to do something, because Kylo started chasing after his hand like a cat searching for pets. 

“Kylo,” Hux said louder. “You have to wake up now, I’m afraid. Come on, open your eyes and I’ll give you a kiss.” 

“M’ wake,” Kylo mumbled. He opened his eyes for about a second and then closed them tight shut. “There. Kiss me.” 

“That’s not open, Kylo Ren. Open your eyes and leave them open for… five seconds,” Hux said. 

“You counting or me counting?” Kylo mumbled. 

“Me,” Hux said in exasperation. Kylo’s parents and servants probably had a hell of a time trying to wake him up in the morning. 

“Ugh, do it,” Kylo groaned. He opened his eyes and glared at Hux. 

“One…” Hux said and began to count very, very slowly. “Twooooo….” He drew out the sound, making Kylo glare more. “I start over if you blink. Threeee!” 

“You dick,” Kylo hissed. Hux could see his eyes were starting to water.

“Don’t interrupt me. Foooooour,” he said. He opened his mouth to speak and paused. 

“Say it!” Kylo snapped. 

“Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive,” Hux said, drawing this word out extra long. “See, not so b-mmph!” 

Kylo about slammed into him for a kiss. Hux started to laugh into the kiss, which broke it up pretty quickly. 

“That’s not fair,” Kylo whined. “That’s not fair, that wasn’t even long enough to be a kiss.” 

Hux leaned over and kissed him. Sure, it didn’t do shit for him, not in a sexual or sensual way. But it made Kylo happy, so Hux did kind of like kissing Kylo. Making Kylo happy made kissing worth it. 

Kylo was wearing a dopey smile when Hux pulled away. 

“Come here, let me return the favor,” Kylo said. Before Hux even had time to process, Kylo had dragged him over and was placing little kisses on Hux’s ear. Hux felt his face heat up, but he didn’t try to pull away. It just felt really nice. 

Kylo nuzzled his nose against the outer rim of Hux’s ear. “Now,” he breathed into Hux’s ear, making Hux shiver. “What has you getting me up at the ass crack of dawn?” 

Hux swallowed. “Your mother came in and asked me to wake you.” 

“Oh,” Kylo said, pulling away. He looked around the room, trying to see her. 

Hux tried not to feel abandoned, but he couldn’t quite help it. He sat up and looked at Kylo. He could feel the warmth quickly leaving his skin as he moved away from the warmth of the embrace and the blankets. 

“She said to get dressed and come down for breakfast, and that we’re leaving in a half hour,” Hux said. He tore the blankets off himself and got out of bed. It was even colder than the night before. Kylo really did keep it freezing in his room.   
“Oh yeah, we gotta get your stuff,” Kylo said. “You go get dressed. I’ll come get you to take you to breakfast.” 

“Anything to get out of this freezer,” Hux said. He walked out with as much of a stride as his injured thigh would allow. He was damn lucky that his leg wasn’t broken, given how hard his father had stomped on his thigh. Now that he was out of the warmth and in the cold his bruises started to hurt more. 

He’d never been beaten so thoroughly and in so many visible places. Normally his father was much better about his image. That was what Hux had depended on to save his life. And it had. But when his father started hitting his face, Hux had a moment of true fear where he thought maybe his father would just go through with it.

Hux had always, always known that his father believed in honor. It wasn’t a really sensible thing to believe in. There was the honor of the family, but really it was just his father’s own ego. But that was all it took for the man to control every aspect of both his wife’s and son’s lives. A small crack in his ego was all it took for Brendol Hux Sr to break and dole out harsh punishments for the smallest slights. 

Hux had read once about honor killings, about fathers killing their children because they’d brought shame to the family for the terrible crimes of not wanting to marry older men, being raped or being gay. Hux had known with absolute certainty that was what his father would do when Hux came out. He’d been certain because his father had always acted and believed that his son was an asset to his political career and nothing more. 

Hux’s anger started to ratchet up and he walked into the room he’d been given and had to resist slamming the door. 

His father was beaten him badly and his mother hadn’t called the police on him. She’d never called the police even once. Sometimes she sent him off to a friend’s house for the night. But she never really defended him or herself. 

Hux had to blink back tears. He rubbed gently at them to try and not bother his swollen skin. He just felt so much. This was the emotional crash after the fight. He was furious at his own powerlessness. He was angry that his mother bartered to have him be thrown out of the house, rather than killed. He was angry that she stayed there with his father. He was angry that Kylo’s parents accepted him right in and did everything they could to help Hux get the care he needed. He was angry that Kylo had that, and that Hux didn’t. 

And he was heartbroken too. He’d hoped that maybe his father would only be angry, that maybe he’d hold it in. He knew he should be grateful to just be alive, but this was so far from what he wanted. He wanted to still be at home, scared of being found out, but with his parents. 

Against everything he loved them both so much. 

Hux let out a breath and began to get dressed. He wished that he had the liberty to dress as freely as Kylo did. He would love to wear jeans and a ratty tee shirt. Instead he pulled on his slightly wrinkled khakis, dress shoes and button up. He took time get his hair into proper order. 

He was going to see his mother today, and maybe his father. He wasn’t going to let either of them see him being less than he was. 

“Hey, Hux!” Kylo called, knocking on the door loudly. 

Hux sighed, “It’s not locked,” he called back. He began to limp to the door. His leg hurt badly. He wondered if he could take more of his painkiller after he’d eaten breakfast. He hoped so. His ribs were screaming at him. Two were broken from where his father had repeatedly kicked him. He was lucky there were only two broken, but there wasn’t anything to do but wait for them to heal on their own. 

Kylo opened the door. He scoffed when he saw Hux dressed normally. “Really? You can dress like a normal person now.” 

“This is how I dress, Kylo,” Hux snipped. “I wouldn’t expect you to understand being neat and tidy.” 

“Freaking Mormon,” Kylo muttered. He walked the rest of the way over. He took Hux’s hand in his own and laced their fingers. “Come on, you should eat. You need food before you can take you medicine.” 

Hux smiling a little. Kylo did think about him, sometimes anyway. He gave Kylo’s hand a little squeeze. He grabbed his pills and let Kylo guide him down to the dining room. 

It wasn’t the same dining room they’d eaten in when his parents had come with him that first time. It was smaller, set only for the exact number of people who would be there for breakfast. Rey was already sitting there in her uniform eating a muffin. 

“Morning Kylo! Morning Mr Hux,” she said sweetly. 

“Good morning,” Hux said quietly. 

“I thought we weren’t going to school today,” Kylo said, frowning. 

“Rey wants to go to school today,” Kylo’s father said. “I’m taking her in today. You two are going with Leia.” 

“Wait, really?” Kylo asked, turning to look at his mother who was standing out in one of the halls, a phone about glued to her ear, whispering tensely into the receiver. 

“Yes,” Kylo’s father said. “You three are going to be the most protected moving crew in history.” His was smirking in a way that reminded Hux desperately of Kylo. He looked down at his empty plate and tried not to blush. Had he just gotten a glimpse of what Kylo might look like when he grew up? It was nice.

Kylo’s mother came over to the table, her annoyed expression fading right off into something more serene. Hux envied her that ability. 

“Eat up, boys,” she said. She sat down and began to butter toast. She was in a pair of slacks and a blouse, which Hux was pretty certain wasn’t what she wore to work, but she was more dressed up than what someone who would be moving anything should be in. Even his own mother had jeans for moving days. 

Kylo nudged Hux and handed him a plate of bacon. 

“Thank you,” Hux murmured politely. It was a second nature. His mother had insisted on her son having good table manners. His father doubled down on those lessons until Hux basically couldn’t slouch at the dinner table at all. 

He envied the easy breakfast. Kylo had abysmal table manners. Even Kylo’s father had his elbows on the table. Kylo’s mother was able to move around to grab things without getting any butter or jam or anything on her pastel sleeves. But even she didn’t look as stiff as Hux knew he was. 

Rey sang between bites of cereal. It would be endearing if it didn’t make Hux’s anxiety shoot up. Against all reason, he good still practically see Han smacking Rey and yelling at her to be silent. When the older man reached out and gently tucked a bit of Rey’s hair behind her ear, love in his expression, Hux found himself wincing. It was ridiculous to expect that people would act like his father, but he couldn’t help what his brain supplied. 

It had never seemed so bad before. But the warm, loving family scene just put his own family in such stark contrast.

He glanced at Kylo to see that Kylo was giving him a worried look. Hux straightened up even more and pulled up his walls and his mask. He needed to pull himself together. They were going to see his mother, and possibly his father. He didn’t have the luxury of appearing weak. 

“Okay, Rey-Rey,” Kylo’s father said. “Let’s get you off to school.” 

“Okay, daddy,” the little girl chirped. She jumped up and grabbed her bag from underneath the chair. 

“You have a good day,” Kylo’s father said. He walked to his wife and placed a kiss on her ear. The President blushed and actually giggled. 

Hux blushed too. He looked down at his eggs and tried not to think about what he’d just seen. He glanced at Kylo who just seemed annoyed by the display. For him it was probably normal. 

Han Solo took his daughter’s hand and walked out, while Rey waved goodbye to her family and then turned to chat with her father. Hux couldn’t help himself but wish that he could swap places with her. He wished he got be eight again and had someone who would hold his hand like that and that no one would fuss at his mother for doing such things. 

Hell, he wasn’t even certain if he wanted to be his mother’s child at the moment. He just wished he had someone who would have treated him like that at that age. Hux was pretty certain that Kylo’s parents had treated him that way as well. Clearly they hadn’t stuck the landing of parenting once Kylo got older. But Hux was certain that at least tried to love their son. The same couldn’t be said about his own family.

“Brendol,” Kylo’s mom said, interrupting his thoughts. 

“I prefer Hux, ma’am,” he said. 

“Alright then,” she said. “Hux. You and Ben are in trouble.” 

Hux’s stomach turned over the same time Kylo started to whine. “What for?” 

“I found you two in bed together this morning,” she said. 

“Oh that,” Kylo said so flippantly that Hux whipped his head around to stare at Kylo. Was he crazy? Who talked to their parents that way? 

“Yes, that,” the President said. Hux expected a cold tone, but her words seemed to be touched with warmth. Hux turned back to Kylo’s mother and saw that she was looking at her son fondly. 

“Nothing happened. Hux had a crappy day yesterday, obviously. It was just like when Rey comes in for a bad dream,” Kylo said.

Hux kicked Kylo under the table, making Kylo wince.

“I’m not a child,” Hux hissed. 

“If I’d had the kinda day you had, I’d be looking to find you as well,” Kylo said like it was that simple. And Hux realized that for Kylo, it was. Kylo had wanted to be his friend. He would go to his friend for comfort. 

“Oh,” Hux said quietly. He ducked his head and blushed. 

“I don’t mind you comforting your friend,” Kylo’s mother cut in gently. “It’s that you two were photographed kissing in public.” 

“Mom,” Kylo whined. 

“No,” Kylo’s mother said, again in that gentle voice. “If you boys are going to make a habit of this, you have to keep the door open. You’re both too young to be having sex.” 

“Oh my God! Mom!” Kylo wailed and buried his face in his hands. 

Hux didn’t bury his face in his hands, but he wanted to. He did turn very red and he did his best to appear interested in his knees.

“I remember being 15,” she said. “And you’re dating or at least making a good stab at attempting to do so. I’m still your mother. I don’t mind you two spending time together. And Hux, dear, I’m not going to throw you out for upsetting me. You could set the building on fire and I wouldn’t abandon you. You’re Ben’s friend.” 

“Yes ma’am,” Hux said quietly. He nodded. He knew his face was still very red. “Really, nothing happened.” 

“I am certain it didn’t, this time. Hence the new rule. I don’t need to know anything that you boys are talking about, but the door stays open.” 

“All the time?” Kylo asked. 

“When you two are alone together, yes,” Kylo’s mother said. “If Rey or one of your other friends are there, then you can close to the door. You can even keep it partially shut, but it better not be completely shut if you two are alone. And if you end up sharing a bed again, you keep the door all the way open. Understood?” 

“Yes, Ma’am,” Hux said automatically. 

Kylo let out a deep sigh. “Yeah, okay.” 

“Good,” Kylo’s mother said. “Now, shall we go?” 

“Yeah, but Hux has to take his medicine first.” Kylo said, standing up. “How many people are going with us?” 

“Enough,” the President said grimly. 

Hux felt like that seemed fairly ominous. He quickly swallowed his pills, then stood and followed Kylo and his mother to the limo. There were already four other adults inside. Hux guessed they were Secret Service. Kylo’s mother talked business with Hux, filling him in about the paperwork they’d need to either foster him or get him legally emancipated. She talked about putting him on their phone plan, and making certain to tell the school to send any information to Kylo’s parents, rather than his own. 

Hux wasn’t certain how all of this was going to go. He decided that he didn’t need to know yet. Besides, Kylo held his hand during the car ride. Kylo’s thumb rubbing over his skin was a welcome distraction from the absolute overload of information he was getting. 

When the limo arrived, the President waited until the door was opened. The four strangers got out first and then the President, Kylo and Hux. There was already a small congregation of Secret Service agents out front of the apartment building. 

“Secret Service can’t have their hands full when they’re protecting us,” Kylo explained as they were ushered quickly inside. “But they also wanted to get us out soon, and mom insisted on going or else she wouldn’t bet here. So there’s about double what she’d normally get, because I’m here and your dad might be up there. And then extra because they’re going to help you move.” 

“Okay,” Hux found himself saying. The noise of Kylo’s voice was a good distraction from the pounding of his own heart. He didn’t care that much, but then he didn’t think Kylo cared. He was just trying to help him keep distracted.

It was a surreal experience to walk down the now familiar hallways and have them be lined with guards to protect him and his friend and his friend’s mother from his own family. 

He didn’t think that his father could actually hurt them, even if they had a fourth of the guard, but Hux was glad to have them. 

They walked into the apartment, and Hux was instantly enveloped into familiar arms. 

“Oh Bren,” his mother breathed out. “You’re safe.” 

Hux felt a now familiar prickling behind his eyes. As much as he didn’t want to care at all, the smallest bit of affection and he caved. All his mother had to do was hug him, and he almost didn’t care that she hadn’t grabbed him and run a long time ago. 

“Hi Mama,” he said quietly. 

“Excuse me, ma’am,” one of the secret service agents said. “But you need to step back.” 

“But, I’m his mother,” his mother protested. 

“You need to step back,” the agent said more insistently. 

“Let that boy go,” his father snarled, striding into the room. He didn’t look as well collected as he normally did and that made Hux shudder a bit. His father’s moustache nearly quivered with a not well contained rage. He looked like he might well spring on Hux, or the President, Secret Service be damned. His father sneered as he began his next words. “He’s not worth all this trouble.” 

Hux stepped back, stepping backwards until he walked into Kylo. He startled a bit, but Kylo settled his arm around him. Hux turned to look at him. Kylo’s grip tightened, almost like a hug. Hux allowed it to steady him. 

“And here’s the woman who caused all this trouble,” his father spat. His angered gaze turned from his son to the President. 

The President stepped between Hux and his father. He knew she wasn’t tall, he was probably even taller than her. His father certainly was. But she just seemed so tall then, taller than everyone else in the room. 

“The only one who’s caused trouble is you,” the President said. There was none of the warmth in her voice from earlier in the morning. It was cold and hard and Hux was glad he wasn’t on the receiving end of it. 

“You called the police on me,” his father said. The words were surprisingly calm, given the way his upper lip quivered. Hux wondered when his father had gotten home from the station. It pleased him to think that his father had been there all night. 

“The very self-evident injuries on your son did that,” the President said. 

His father sneered. He raked his eyes over Hux, pure disgust on his face. Hux stood there with his uneven stance from his hurt thigh, struggling to breathe properly with his broken ribs, and one of his eyes only barely opening. Was his father proud of what he’d done? 

“The boy’s always in trouble. He walked out and got himself hurt and blamed it on me. You’re really going to believe a boy over the word of a senator?” His father asked. Hux recognized the way his father slimed out of trouble, smarmed out of trouble for something he’d actually don’t. He’d already built the narrative to discredit his own son. 

“Yes, I believe him,” the President said flatly. “Boys, go help the agents get Hux’s things together,” she said in a gentle voice before she turned back to Hux’s parents. “And you are both going to get me Brendol’s birth certificate, social security card, and all relevant documents. He’s not coming back here.” 

“Come on,” Kylo whispered in his ear. He tightened his grip on Hux and guided him down the hall toward Hux’s room. The agents swarmed around them. The plain clothes agents who were helping them pack stuck close, but other suited agents also went with them. 

Hux did his best to tune out the adults from there. He was focused on getting his hard drive and other school files, on getting his books and pillows and clothes and other familiar things. He had some things tucked away and hidden, like the little box of toy cars from when he was a little boy that he’d buried under school papers in his desk so he could keep them close, but also so his father wouldn’t find them. 

He still felt ashamed at having them, even though he knew Kylo had all kinds of action figures and crap all over his room. Packing up all his meticulously filed school folders made him feel like a freak as well. But Kylo didn’t do more than gentle teasing. 

And Hux wasn’t even mad at Kylo for doing that. It was a distraction from whenever his father would start shouting, or the times when the President raised her voice. And there was a moment when his mother started shouting as well. That made him shudder. He didn’t want to think about it. 

After his room was stripped bare, Kylo put on arm around his shoulders. They were waiting for the OK from the Secret Service to leave the room. Hux leaned against Kylo. 

“Thank you for coming,” Hux murmured. 

“You’re my boyfriend, of course I’m gonna go with you for this nonsense,” Kylo said with a smile. The smile was strained, but so was the smile Hux gave Kylo in return. Hux appreciated that Kylo was trying. 

“All clear,” one of the agents said.

Kylo pulled away, but he took Hux’s hand and guided Hux back to the living room. It was almost like Kylo lived there, not Hux. For a half second, Hux wished that Kylo did. Then Hux shook that thought away with a quick jerk of his head. He wouldn’t wish this on anyone, especially not Kylo. 

His father was no where to be seen when they came out to the living room. The President was waiting by the door, but so was his mother. Hux pulled away from Kylo and walked right up to his mother. 

“You’re going,” she said quietly. 

“Yeah,” Hux said. “Is that for me?” he asked, eyeing the knit blanket in her arms. It was just blue, there wasn’t a fancy pattern or anything. He knew it had been meant to be a baby blanket, but even folded he could tell there was now too much of it for it to be a baby blanket. Maybe a lap blanket? 

“Yes,” she said quietly. She extended her hands, offering it to him. He accepted it. “I’m afraid I worked on it too long last night… I didn’t get much sleep,” she admitted. 

“Thank you,” Hux said quietly. He looked at her sad face. He knew he should leave it at that, but he couldn’t. “Please come with me,” he begged. 

“Oh, Bren,” she whispered. She dragged him into a hug. Hux couldn’t help but swallow his disappointment. She didn’t even have to say it for him to know that the answer was no. 

“Can you come visit?” he asked into her shoulder. 

“I’m not certain that’s a good idea,” she said. 

Hux wrapped his arms around her and gave her a solid hug, but then he pulled away. That had to be enough. She’d never give him more than what she gave her husband. He had to accept that. 

“The Organa family will take care of you,” his mother assured him. 

“Of course, mother,” Hux said. He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Take care.” 

He turned away and looked at Kylo. Kylo’s face was set in shock. Hux gripped his blanket tighter. He could hide the pain. He knew he could. He’d been doing it all his life. Except that he didn’t have to. 

He stepped into Kylo’s space and laid his cheek on Kylo’s shoulder. Kylo’s frozen shock broke. He snaked an arm around Hux’s waist and hugged him close. 

The President led them out. Hux didn’t look back at his mother. He just hugged that soft blue blanket a little tighter as they walked out of the apartment building.

* * *

Phasma got Ren’s rapid text wall of information right before bed. She’d been told they wouldn’t be at school. Still, it freaked her out to see they weren’t there. Not having them there made the day drag on terribly, especially when she found out that Hux’s father had been arrested. It was on the news. It was on the blogs. 

Good. Fuck that guy. She hoped he got raped in prison, if even a tenth of what Ren described was true. (Though she knew he wouldn’t really end up in prison. He was too connected.) Normally, even thinking about that happening to anyone made her stomach twist and brought up nasty, hazy, drug-hidden memories of nights she never wanted to remember. But it was with a grim set of her mouth that she decided if it was Hux’s dad, that it was fine. Even if it was violent and not just because he was too whacked out, it was fine. Hell, it was better. He deserved it. 

It was a shame that he wasn’t going to go to prison. 

The school day wasn’t a quarter over when Phasma texted Ren to tell him she was coming over for dinner to check on Hux, and then asked to go to the bathroom so she could slip away to call her grandparents. 

“Grandma, I need you to make your famous roast honey almonds,” Phasma said when her grandmother picked up. 

“What did your mother do?” her grandmother asked, her voice dropping subglacial. 

“Nothing, for once. No, my friend Hux. His dad beat the shit out of him last night and threw him out and now he’s living with the Organas,” she said. 

“Well… damn,” her grandmother breathed. “Yes, I’ll make them. You come right home after school and you can decorate the jar. 

Phasma smiled a bit. That would make it special, and that would give her something to do with her hands.

“Thanks Grandma,” she said and hung up. Kylo had already texted her back telling her that was fine. She added that her grandparents were both coming and bringing Hux some comfort food.

She texted Treena next. 

‘I’m missing our date. Hux’s dad beat him and tossed him for being gay. I’m going to go see him,’ she sent to Treena. Treena would know who to tell in the Youth Group. 

‘Shit. I saw the news this morning. We were wondering where he was. He’s always there and always infuriating,’ Treena said. 

‘Any jokes about him being thrown out last night?’ 

‘Of course. I’ll make sure it’s shut up before he gets back. Give me a hug for me?’ 

‘Of course. Reschedule?’ 

‘Yeah. Text me when you have time.’ 

‘Will do, sweetheart,’ Phasma sent. She smiled at the little icon with Treena’s sweet face. She gave herself a moment to be happy to just have a really cute, understanding, bad ass tiny girlfriend. Then she had to shove her phone in her pocket, leave the bathroom and go back to real life. 

The rest of the day couldn’t have passed fast enough. She ubered to her grandparents’ house and changed. She didn’t have to time to dress up fabulous. She kept some clothes at her grandparents’ house. She changed into her skinny jeans and slightly oversized red plaid shirt. She loved that shirt because the first time her mother saw it she’d wrinkled her nose and demanded Phasma change, claiming it made her daughter look like a lesbian. 

Even now, Phasma loved it. Every time she saw herself in the mirror wearing it she thought two things: This makes me look like a Lesbian? Good. 

She grabbed her black heels off the floor of her room and headed to her grandmother’s kitchen. The heavenly smell of roast almonds had already permeated the house. Phasma had a short amount of time to design the jar. 

She already knew what she was going to make. The church Hux attended had some really nifty stained glass windows. She knew how to make a stained glass design with glass paints. She’d been doing similar crafts with her grandmother for years. 

She set her hands to the task. It took her concentration, which was good. She was able to set it aside to dry and get a little homework done. And when she wasn’t doing homework she was distracted by her grandfather’s nervous clothes changing. She enjoyed teasing him about being so scared to meet the President. Her grandmother enjoyed it to.

They poured the cooled nuts into the large mason jar Phasma had designed. Her grandmother put the lid on, and Phasma held the burlap on while he grandmother tied the twine with little label that said “For Hux” on it around the neck of the jar. 

“There, properly Southern?” her grandmother asked. 

“I hope he thinks so,” Phasma said. 

The car trip was nerve wracking. Even though Phasma knew Hux was okay, she needed to see for herself that he was in one piece. She was too worried to care about her grandfather’s nerves, or that the Secret Service took time to check their gift before they’d let them in. She wasn’t listening when Ren’s father came to get them, and when her grandfather corrected Han Solo’s pronunciation of “Henri”, his first name. 

She tried to not tap her toes as they walked down to the family sitting room. She didn’t know what she expected, but seeing Ren, Hux and Rey playing Sorry was not it. 

“Phasma!” Rey shouted. She jumped up and ran over to Phasma, wrapping both of her arms around Phasma’s legs and hugging her tightly. 

“Hey, Rey-Rey,” she said, ruffling Rey’s hair. 

She looked past the little girl, though, to Kylo who was practically pressed against Hux. Kylo smiled and waved. And Hux? Hux was battered and bruised and clearly beaten, but he was also scowling, which made so much of the tension in Phasma’s chest ease. Hux wouldn’t let a bastard like his dad break him. 

“Hello boys,” she said lazily. 

“What’s with the jar, Phaz?” Ren asked, eyeing the large jar in her arms. 

“It’s pretty,” Rey interjected.

“It’s a get well gift for Hux,” Phasma said. She moved around Rey and offered Hux the colorful jar. 

Hux looked confused, but he accepted it. He shifted the jar around, looking through the paint, trying to make out the contents. “Almonds?” 

“My grandmother makes the best roasted honey almonds in the world,” Phasma explained. “She always made them for me after my mom was especially shitty… and I uh, designed the jar.” 

“You… both… made this for me?” Hux asked. He looked shocked for a second and then he stared down at the jar in his hands, trying to close off his expression. 

“Hux, she’s you friend,” Ren said in a gentle voice. 

“She’s your friend too,” Hux said quickly. They exchanged a look that Phasma couldn’t decipher before Hux looked up at her with a look that about begged her to agree with him. “Right?” 

“Of course,” she said, lowering herself to sit in the free place around the table. Rey had already retucked herself into her own spot. “But you’re the one who’s had the weekend from hell, so they’re for you.” 

Hux was silent for a moment. Ren rubbed Hux’s arm, clearly being extra gentle. Phasma wondered what wounds those sleeves hid. She felt her rage spike. Hux’s formal clothes and high collars and left a lot of skin covered, hiding evidence of abuses past. 

“Would you guys mind starting the game over so I can play?” she asked.

Sometimes there were moments to talk about things. But not when both Ren and Hux were looking bewildered by the idea of friendship and gifts. They’d have to talk about that later, and about the boys clearly trying to take care of each other, and about Hux’s bastard father. But it didn’t have to be yet. 

Besides, Rey looked super happy to start over with another person. And Kylo gave in easily. That probably mean that Hux’s tactical mind had been kicking their asses. Good. She hadn’t gotten a chance to face off against him yet. She had been looking forward to that for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all again! 
> 
> I want to encourage you all again to read my FinnRey Fic [Hold My Hand](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6056262). It's set after the events of this fic, but there aren't any spoilers except that this story has a happy ending (of course). 
> 
> I also want to link some wonderful art!
> 
> The lovely azira-fail has drawn two pieces based on the fic [The first, including Kylo Ren in his first skirt outfit!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/139981994970/robinasnyder-azira-fail-some-high-school-au).  
> [Some Lovely Headshots](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140262018520/more-of-robinasnyders-high-school-au-bc-i-am).  
> [Said Love Headshots in color!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140313167665/buncha-teenage-losers-and-bonus-man-bun-kylo)
> 
> The lovely idleart made this super nice [piece of art of Hux and Ren](http://idleart.tumblr.com/post/140523637692/i-was-gonna-color-this-more-but-who-has-the-energy).
> 
> Also steamworkblue made this piece [here](http://steamworkblue.tumblr.com/post/140673220951/i-swear-its-not-a-phase-mom-go-read-this-it), which is inspired by the fic and discussions we've had. 
> 
> I also need to thank steamworkblue specifically for getting me the information I needed about Non-Binary and Genderqueer, which helped me with the way I'll be writing Ren from now on. 
> 
> Final note! 
> 
> I super, duper appreciate the fanart! I really do! but pleeeeeease tell me when you make any art work for the fic. I want to link it in the notes. I want to know about its existence. I love talking to people. My tumblr is the literal same as my AO3. Please message me a link. 
> 
> Thank you!


	10. Chapter 10

Hux was surprised the way time passed. Two weeks melted into nothing at all. He slept in his new bed, woke up, dressed and went to school. He ate breakfast and other meals with the Organa-Solo family. He did homework with Ren and Rey when school was over. He hung out with Phasma when she came over, which was often. He just didn’t go anywhere else. 

He pushed play on the video clip from two weeks back. He’d saved it, along with other news pieces reporting on his father. In a way it was a relief to know that the media had responded, and that his belief that someone would care if anything happened to him hadn’t been unfounded. In a way the fallout his father faced made Hux a little giddy. Certainly his father still had time to get his constituents in line and earn another term. But it had done damage. People were angry, angry for Hux, angry at his father. 

It was everything Hux could have hoped and nothing he could have ever done on his own. So in that way it was satisfying. 

Listening to news man Remington Hernandez talk about the immediate fallout from that night raised Hux’s mood. Some of it wasn’t true. Hux was certain that his father didn’t yells slurs at staff. But knowing that people didn’t like him enough to take that opportunity to cut into Senator Hux’s reelection campaign was satisfying in its own way. To hear that other conservative senators had begun cutting ties immediately also made Hux feel a tiny bit better about the state of the world. 

Pictures had been taken of him when he’d first gone back to school, when he still had bruises on his face. They hadn’t just been circled around the gossip rags and the conservative blogs. They’d hit twitter, and there after the news media, as had the photos that had been given to the police. 

Hux let out a breath and paused the video, trying to keep himself from thinking too hard about that. He hadn’t agreed to the release of the photos. The President had been furious, but no one knew who did it. Hux didn’t even care about why. The same media that saved his life now followed him and Kylo around the second they showed their faces anywhere that wasn’t school. 

Once, just once, Phasma convinced them to go for ice cream. She’d carried Rey into the little store near campus. Kylo had taken Hux’s hand before they even left school and they’d walked into the ice cream store like that. He’d done that a lot since Hux came to live with him, like he could tell when Hux wanted someone to tell him it would be okay. Hux had just been nervous about breaking their normal routine, worried that Kylo’s parents would be unhappy. 

But all that happened was that they had made quite a picture to go online. Hux and Kylo hanging back, looking at ice cream flavors while Phasma held Rey up as she pointed out to the kid behind the counter what flavors she wanted. There had been secret service in the store as well, but plain clothes so they’d just looked like people. 

It wasn’t a bad picture, really. Phasma printed a copy of that picture out, had them all sign it, framed it and set up a little auction online. The proceeds had gone to a local group that tried to help homeless gay youths. It garnered about two thousand dollars, which Hux thought was way too much for such a stupid picture, but Phasma insisted that it was good press. 

Hux just hated it. He hated suddenly having his picture taken all the time. He hated that if he so much as stepped foot off campus or the White House, then people stared at him. He hated that he’d gotten lost one evening when they were some event and he’d gotten caught up by statesmen who’d wanted to tell him what a tragedy his life was and wanted their picture taken with him. He’d been trapped there for nearly twenty minutes until Mr Solo had come and rescued him. 

He hadn’t told anyone that he’d ended up shaking as Mr Solo held him, while the older man whispered to him that he’d held up perfectly, admirably. Seeing the photos the next day, Hux knew that he’d been panicked. Kylo had frowned when he saw them, like maybe he knew too. But no one else seemed to notice that he hadn’t wanted to be in those photos.

Listening to older news clips about his father’s tumble from grace helped. Some. It reminded him that everything that happened now was worth it. 

There was a quiet knock on his door. 

“Hux?” Kylo asked. 

“Come in,” Hux said. He closed the video and turned around before Kylo could see. 

The President herself assured Hux that no one was going to monitor what was on his computer. Hux still didn’t use it for much besides school work and checking the political blogs. He believed her, he really did. But it was too many years of having to hide that kept him from doing anything on the computer that his father might have considered suspect, the videos of Senator Hux’s disgrace aside. 

Kylo had his girl’s uniform on again. Some days he went with the boy’s uniform and some days, most days he went with the girl’s uniform. He had his hair back. Phasma had taught Hux and Kylo to braid. They weren’t the best at it, but Hux thought that what he’d done with Kylo’s hair the previous night had held up well, all things considered. And Phasma could make it look good when they got to school.

Kylo had done his own make up. Hux could always tell the difference between when Phasma did it and when Kylo did it, but that didn’t mean that Hux could explain why it was different, or that Kylo didn’t look good standing there in front of Hux. 

“Are you ready?” Kylo asked. 

“Yeah,” Hux said. He turned off his monitor and stood. He grabbed his bag, already packed, from next to his desk and followed Kylo out. 

They didn’t get far before Kylo grabbed onto his hand and gave it a squeeze. 

“You nervous?” Hux asked. He didn’t feel bad enough that day that he thought Kylo would need to hold his hand. 

“No. I just want to hold your hand,” Kylo said. He rolled his eyes, and Hux just rolled his eyes back at Kylo. 

Sometimes the boy was just weird. 

They walked to the limo, which was sitting waiting for them with Rey already in it. “You two take too long,” she informed them. 

“We’re not going to be late,” Hux said, slipping into his spot. 

“You aren’t,” Rey said. Hux nearly smiled. He didn’t know when she’d started being snippy back to him, but he approved. 

“You won’t either,” Ren said, rolling his eyes. 

Kylo leaned over against Hux for the trip in. Hux didn’t mind. It had become normal. Just like how Hux now walked Rey to her class with Ren. They would hold her hands and swing her between them. She giggled every time, and Kylo would laugh like that was the happiest he’d ever been. It made something thaw in Hux’s heart. 

He knew it was terrible to think it, and twisted, since he was still sort of dating Kylo (except not really), but Hux sort of wished that he was part of the Organa-Solo family. Certainly they treated him like he was one of them. He had the same curfew and the same homework expectations as Kylo. Mr Solo, generally, would look over their homework to be certain that it was actually done. And Hux ate breakfast with them every morning and dinner as well. He was given a packed lunch, which was based on both his preferences and nutritional needs. 

He walked around the house and none of the secret service bothered him or gave him strange looks. He simply went where he wanted. That had been how he’d ended up at the dinner. Kylo or Rey could have done the same thing if they needed to see their parents. Hux had been informed that had happened about five or six times. Mostly the Organa-Solo kids tried not to, but sometimes it happened. 

It was weird to be treated the same way Rey and Kylo were, because Hux could almost imagine that having always been his life. He made certain to not allow that fantasy to extend too far. He was related to who he was related to for a reason. He wouldn’t be who he was without it. And while he couldn’t say he necessarily liked himself, he couldn’t imagine himself being anyone else. 

“You’re in deep thought today,” Kylo said when they finished dropping Rey off at her class. 

“Tired,” Hux said. 

“You ran off before breakfast was finish,” Kylo said. 

“Yeah. I just wanted to finish something,” Hux said weakly. He hadn’t been in the mood to deal with people much that morning. Seeing the President at breakfast had put him on edge for no other reason than she vaguely reminded him of his father, and that wasn’t that exact. He’d fled trying to find a moment of peace from his own thoughts before he had to deal with all the people at school.

“Uh-huh,” Ren said. He pulled his book bag off his shoulders and pulled out something wrapped in tinfoil. “I had the cooks make you a bagel sandwich.” 

“Thank you,” Hux said. He accepted the food, unwrapped it and took a bite. He’d had about a piece of toast, which was very not filling. But a toasted bagel with eggs, meat, cheese and vegetables was both very filling and delicious. But he began eating because it gave him a reason to no talk as they walked to school.

He tried not to look at the gates. He was glad they were so high. The press was not allowed on school grounds, and the school was surrounded by a tall iron fence with high bushes all around to block the view. There hadn’t been any pictures taken of him from school that weren’t from students (which Hux couldn’t exactly stop, and didn’t completely mind). But a part of him was always jumpy about the idea of someone professional getting pictures past the gates. 

“Come on,” Kylo said. He took Hux’s hand and guided him into their school building, down the pristine halls and to their homeroom. By the time they arrived Hux had eaten the entire sandwich and felt better. Between a full stomach and the warmth of Kylo’s hand, Hux felt a little more like a person than he had when he’d had to flee the breakfast table. 

Oddly enough, Phasma was already there. She normally arrived closer to a normal time. 

“Hello boys,” she said, lounging back in her chair. 

“Good morning,” Kylo chirped. He let go of Hux’s hand long enough to kiss Phasma’s cheek. 

Hux didn’t feel bad about it. Phasma and Kylo fit together so well, but in a friendly way. Whenever Kylo broke up with Hux for Phasma, Hux was certain that they would enjoy their fake dating. It also cheered him to know that he would still be able to crawl into Ren’s bed at night when he needed to. Kylo had given him a very open invitation, and his family didn’t seem to mind their impromptu sleepovers too much. 

Hux lowered himself into his desk. He rested a hand on Kylo’s desk. When Ren sat he scooped up Kylo’s hand and cradled it between his own hands. Hux was slowly getting used to these affections, and the smile that settled onto Kylo’s face when he got to do so. 

“So, Lover Boy, have you told him yet?” Phasma asked, sounding fondly exasperated. 

“No,” Kylo whined out. 

“Told me what, exactly?” Hux asked. 

“We’re taking you shopping,” Phasma said. 

“You’re what?” Hux asked, his voice dropping. 

“We’re taking you the mall,” Kylo said. “I already talked it out and mom and dad and the secret service.” 

“I don’t want to go,” Hux said. He let go of Ren’s hand and stuck his hand in his lap where Kylo couldn’t get to it. 

“Hux,” Kylo said. Hurt flashed across his face like he was the one who’d had people planning things for him to do against his will. 

“Look, Babe,” Phasma said, drawing Hux’s attention to her. “You dress like your father still picks out your clothes. You’ve also barely left the house. We put together a plan, and going to temporarily clear out a few stores so that you can get a look at what’s there, and you don’t have to worry about cameras.” 

“You didn’t ask me at all,” Hux said. “Did you think about what I wanted?” 

“Well, of course we did,” Kylo said. He sounded uncertain, and when Hux looked back at him he saw that despite his shift in tone, that he still looked wholly determined.

“Really?” Hux demanded. 

“Hux, you haven’t even been to church or your Youth Program or anything,” Kylo protested. 

“Maybe that’s my choice,” Hux snapped. “Maybe I only went to make my family happy.” 

“Except that you didn’t,” Kylo said. He was looking at Hux liked Kylo was sad, sad for him. Hux felt the irrational need to punch Kylo’s large nose in. “You never sound more engaged than when you were in discussion Sunday evenings. And I know that it might not be your favorite Youth House to go to, but you wanted to be there, Hux. It’s important to you.” 

Hux wanted to smack him. But Hux couldn’t refute that. He felt his precise posture slip a little. He wanted to hunch his shoulders, duck his head and hide. But for him, just allowing his shoulders to slump that little bit was equivalent. “When did you start to know me that well?” Hux asked. 

“I pay attention to you,” Kylo said. “Because it’s hard not to. I have a hard time not watching you and not listening to you.” 

Hux found himself hanging his head. He looked down at his hands and squeezed them into fists. How was he supposed to respond to that? 

“The point, Hux,” Phasma continued. “Is that we are your friends, Ren and I. We care about you, and it’s not just for some great prank. We want to help you, and we think the best thing we can do is get you outside for a little while.” 

“Friends?” Hux asked. He looked up, feeling confused. He looked at Phasm and then Kylo. Kylo looked a little embarrassed. 

“After our whole thinking we didn’t like each other thing, I asked Phaz how she felt about us. And she called us idiots and said of course she cared,” Kylo said. 

“Oddly enough, you two are the closest friends I’ve had since I was a kid,” Phasma said. 

“Me too,” Kylo said. 

“Me as well,” Hux said. How could he not after everything. 

Phasma smiled. It wasn’t sultry. It wasn’t a smirk. It wasn’t for show. It was one of Phasma’s rare, wholly unguarded smiles. Hux smiled back, hopefully in a similar manner. She deserved that much from him. 

“So, do you forgive us then?” Kylo asked tentatively. 

“Yes,” Hux said. “But next time include me on the planning. I don’t want to just have people who make me go places.” 

“That’s fair,” Kylo said. “Can I hold your hand again now?” 

Hux placed his hand back on the table and Kylo wrapped his hands around that hand so fast that it was like Kylo was drowning and reaching for a lifeline. Then Kylo leaned down and kissed the top of Hux’s hands. Of course Hux blushed. 

“Ugh. Stop it you two. You’re giving me diabetes,” Phasma groaned. 

“Oh shhh,” Kylo said. “I don’t care.” 

“You’re in a mood today,” Phasma said. She snapped on a predatory smile. Hux lounged back against the stupid bar on the right side of his desk. It was a bit like and arm rest, but mostly it was a pain in the ass. At the moment it was a fine prop to lean against. Especially when Kylo kept kissing the back of his hand. 

Slowly he felt Kylo’s lips trail lazily down his fingers. It wasn’t particularly heading anywhere, but Hux quickly found that he loved it. 

“Lover Boy, you have him panting,” Phasma teased. 

“Shut up, don’t ruin this for me,” Hux said. 

Kylo just laughed against his fingers. He flipped Hux’s hand over and started to lightly nibble down Hux’ index finger. Hux shivered. It felt like worship. As irreverent as that thought was, Hux found that his Christian Guilt wasn’t kicking in. It just felt good that for a second it seemed like he was the center of Kylo’s whole world. 

Kylo kept doing it until the teacher came in and made them stop. Phasma even kept her comments to herself the rest of the time. When Hux finally got his hand to himself it still felt warm. It tingled for a while in all the places Kylo had scrapped his teeth against. Hux was just glad that no one was asked him to write with that hand. He wondered if there was a phrase for feeling weak in the knees in your fingers. 

He’d have to get Kylo to try that again some time.

* * *

Hux didn’t want to admit that maybe the trip to the mall was turning out to be a good idea. The secret service were everywhere. They’d sent Rey home with her own secret service detail, which meant that both Kylo and Phasma were paying plenty of attention to him. The secret service blended in for the most part, but Hux felt like he was getting somewhat better at spotting them. At the very least he knew they were there. They’d clear out a store for a half hour so that Phasma and Kylo could stuff him in and out of clothes without anyone but the clerks stare at them. 

Hux wondered if maybe Kylo felt like he’d had a revelation the first time he’d gone shopping for women’s clothes. He certainly didn’t seem that uncomfortable. He bought things as well. For every pair of tight fighting but masculine pants Kylo picked, he bought a flowy, feminine top. For every masculine shirt, he’d buy a skirt. Phasma even bullied him into a really cute sundress that had Hux blushing when he saw Kylo wearing it. 

Hux didn’t feel too badly about how red his face got. The first time he came out of the dressing room wearing skinny jeans and flannel, blushing and feeling like a damned fool when Phasma messed his hair up, Hux had gotten a look at Kylo’s face. A lovely blush had spread across his cheeks and ears. Kylo looked so beautiful like that, that Hux put that outfit in the buy pile instantly, and let Phasma bully him into trying other things from then on. 

“Well, you’re a huge prep, but whatever,” Phasma said once she really got a chance to look at the clothes Hux had picked. For the most part it was a much more fashionable update of Hux’s very clean cut persona. “Next outing I’m taking you two for a mani-pedi.” 

“A what?” Hux asked as they waited for the okay to go to the next location. 

“Nice things with your fingers and toes,” Kylo said. 

“Ah,” Hux said. “A girly thing?” 

“Mostly,” Phasma said. 

“Do you want to go?” Hux asked Kylo. 

“Yeah. Phasma has told me about it before. It sounds like fun,” Kylo said. “I also want to try a hair boutique.” He looked wistful. 

Hux reached up and tugged on a bit of Kylo’s hair. Phasma had made Kylo’s braids look messier, which somehow made it look better or at least more intentional. Whatever Phasma had told Ren to make him look so hopeful, Hux wanted to be a part of it. 

“Is it a just-you-two thing, or can I go too?” Hux asked. 

“I totally want to take you out for a new hair cut as well,” Phasma said. “And then you can give opinions about what Kylo’s hair should look like.” 

“I can do that,” Hux said. He tugged on his own hair. 

He wondered how different he’d look after all of this. Phasma had gotten him into pants that hugged his body. He already noticed Kylo’s eyes practically glued to his ass in one pair. She’d gotten him jeans, tee shirts, button ups that fit him “better” according to Phasma, and lots of sweaters and “hip” jackets. The boots and sneakers he’d picked where comfortable, but Hux knew it would take a while to get used to them. Sneakers were for gym, in his mind, and otherwise he mainly wore dress shoes. He already felt under dressed, and he still had his school uniform on. 

“I wish we could go to the food court,” Kylo said, sort of out of nowhere. 

“Why? To get food poisoning?” Hux asked with a snort.

“There’s a frozen yogurt place,” Kylo pouted. 

“My question still stands,” Hux said. 

“I just kinda wish I could try being normal for a minute with my friends,” Kylo said. 

Hux felt his ears heat up. He wished that too. “Have you ever been normal?” He asked, the thought suddenly occurring to him. Between being related to Anakin Skywalker and the Organa dynasty and Leia Organa herself, was it even possible that Kylo had ever been allowed to not be watched and followed by the media? 

Kylo snorted. “Not even remotely. But it’s fine. I’m used to it.”

“Wait, is it possible that I’m the only one of us who’s ever been even possibly normal?” Hux asked. 

“Not with your family,” Phasma snorted. She’d been a child star since she was very young. 

“Trust me, my situation is much more common than I wish,” Hux said. 

Kylo gave his hand a squeeze. Hux turned and smiled at him a little bit. He leaned in and gave Kylo a kiss. Kylo beamed and snuggled into Hux’s side like doing so was an actual treat. Hux put his arm around Kylo’s shoulders. 

“So, now that you no longer are going to look like a secret Mormon, do you want to go back to church Sunday?” Kylo asked. 

Hux shook his head. “No, I don’t think I’m going back.” 

“Hux,” Phasma said. She looked concerned. 

“Church people don’t like people like me,” Hux said. 

“I mean, some of them don’t” Phasma said. “But that doesn’t mean they’re going to run you out on a rail or anything.” 

“Nor does it mean they’ll welcome me back,” Hux said. 

“What about your home church, you’ve always talked about how good they were to you. I know they aren’t too, too far away,” Kylo said. 

“No,” Hux said definitively. 

“Why?” Kylo said. “I mean, transportation isn’t a problem anymore, and you wouldn’t see your parents or anything. It seemed like they were important to you.” 

“They are important to me,” Hux said. 

“I don’t understand,” Kylo said. He was snuggled right up to Hux and he had his cheek on Hux’s shoulder and was just looking at him with very sad eyes. 

“Because they are so important. My parents are important to me too, and you saw how that worked out. I can’t stand to go back to a place I considered a second home and have those people spit in my face too. It would be too much for me. I don’t want to do it.” He tightened his grip on Kylo. It was sort of like a hug, but Hux knew it was really just his own way of trying to express his own panic, but also to not move. 

Kylo was the type of boy who could be visibly agitated. Hux wasn’t. He didn’t have that luxury. 

“Okay,” Kylo said quietly. “I won’t make you do anything.” 

“Thanks,” Hux said. He sighed and leaned into Kylo as well. Somehow the warm press off Kylo’s arms was the only thing that made Hux feel at all alright. He didn’t know when Kylo had become so important to him, but he was.

* * *

“You think there’s anything we can do?” Ren asked Phasma over the phone. 

“Not until he’s ready,” Phasma said. 

“I know I should be patient, but that Youth Pastor guy called twice last week to check on Hux, and Hux brushed him off both times,” Ren said. “I really think that he’s like, withdrawing from everything and it’s not… like good.” 

“Yeah,” Phasma said. “I mean, he’s leaning on us a lot, but otherwise he seems so quiet. I don’t know what to do.” 

“Me either. Mom talked him into seeing a therapist, but I’m not sure that’s helping, and he doesn’t talk about what they talk about. For all I know, Hux is just sitting still and silent in the room and not saying anything.” 

Phasma snorted. “Yeah, that sounds like something that Hux would do.” 

“Exactly,” Ren said. He flopped back on his bed and sighed heavily. “I just feel useless. Because he isn’t okay. He’s like… he’s scared.” 

“I would be too, Ren,” Phasma said. “Shit, do you see the stuff that gets posted about him? There’s rumors going around that he’s only staying with you cause you’re fucking you, or letting your dad or mom fuck him. It’s so nasty. And we both know that he follows all that stuff. Plus, oh yeah, his dad nearly killed him.” 

Ren shuddered. He couldn’t help it. Those rumors were nasty. And people were weird. He’d already read a story someone had written where he and Hux were having dirty sex. Which they weren’t. Somehow, just kissing made Ren’s heart want to beat out of his chest. At this rate he’d die of a heart attack if they ever did get into bed together for more than just sleeping. 

And then all the nasty little rumors and secrets that were coming out about Hux’s dad were making Ren think that Hux was truly lucky to be alive. And Hux had believed that all along. Ren just wished he could do anything to make it better for Hux. Hux didn’t deserve any of that shit. 

“I just wish that he had some place where he could feel safe,” Ren said. 

“He feels safe with you at the White House,” Phasma pointed out. 

Ren shook his head. His heart flipped over a bit. He liked that Hux felt safe with him, and he could easily get off on a real tangent if he thought about it too much. But that hadn’t been what he’d meant. “I mean like outside of here. This isn’t his space. It’s my space and we cut out a little place for Hux. Hux used to have his own space. Even though he had problems with the Youth House, it was still his space. But he doesn’t have that now.” 

“I know,” Phasma said. She sounded sad. “Treena says that some of them are worried about him.” 

“And other are probably being nasty,” Ren said bitterly. 

“Not where the guy in charge can hear. But yeah… he’s probably right to not want to go back, which opinions are already so divided,” Phasma said. 

“I mean, he’s new to there. If he’d been there for a while…” Ren trailed off and sighed. 

“I know, but he said he didn’t want to,” Phasma said. She sounded as bitter as Ren felt. Why did people have to be so stupid and mean? 

“Yeah… hey,” Ren started, an idea starting to form. “What if they reached out first?” 

“What if they what now?” Phasma asked. 

“The other Youth guy called here a couple of times, right? What if Hux’s old people called and checked on him?” Ren asked. 

“How would they know where to call?” Phasma asked, sounding exasperated. 

“We could tell them,” Ren said. 

There was a beat of silence on the other line before Phasma groaned. “Dammit, Ren. You’re asking me to get involved with this shit. You realize I know fuck all about all of this, right?” 

“The only church I’ve been to before Hux was Catholic. I know fuck all, as well, but I’m can’t call them, because what if Hux walks in on me doing so?” Ren asked. 

Phasma snorted. “You act like it’s him walking in on you masturbating or something.”

“He was so pissed when we planned the mall trip without him,” Ren pointed out. 

“Right, and you want to do that again, then?” Phasma asked, her voice just dripping with sarcasm. 

“Yeah, but I mean, it’s not like we’re planning a trip for him or anything. You’re just going to call and see if maybe they’d have a problem with him coming back. If they do, then we’ll just keep him away from them and it’ll be fine. But if they want him, then maybe they’ll make contact and he’ll feel wanted.” 

Phasma groaned. “How do I let you talk me into complete nonsense like this?” she demanded. 

“Because we both want to help Hux and neither of us have a really good plan other than this,” Ren said. 

“Okay, alright. You’re right, unfortunately,” Phasma said. “I hate that you’re right about this, though.” 

“I don’t,” Ren said. He found himself to be smirking. “And hey, if helps Hux, then it’s a good plan.” 

“I hate you so, so much,” Phasma said. “But yeah, I’ll make the damn phone calls.” 

“Wizard,” Ren said. 

“For Fuck’s sake, you are not allowed to quote your grandfather after all of this!” 

Ren laugh. “I know, it’s like the worst saying, thing, whatever, like ever.” 

“I saw old clips where he said it more often. Does he still do it?” Phasma asked. 

“Nah. But he does laugh when I or Rey does it,” Ren said. 

“Yeah… I’ll make certain to keep an eye on Hux while you go meet him next week,” Phasma promised. 

“Yeah,” Ren sighed. “I really, really wish you guys could meet him.” 

“Hey, maybe the judge will say yes someday,” she said in a soothing voice. 

“He’s been a stickler about family only,” Ren said. “And now’s probably not a good time for Hux anyway.” 

“Yeah, but you have your uncles coming over next week too. That should be better for him,” Phasma pointed out. 

Ren snorted. “Yeah, if Uncle Luke’s excitable puppy personality doesn’t scare the shit out of Hux.” 

Phasma laughed. “Yeah, well I’ll be there the second day. I can help diffuse if needed.” 

“Nah, that’s what uncle Wedge is for,” Ren said with a laugh. “He just tells Uncle Luke to settle and he will.” 

Phasma laughed again. “I’m super excited to meet him. I really am.” 

“You hoping to take his place as the highest ranking out soldier?” Ren asked. He couldn’t help but smile. 

“Something like that,” she said. “Also, he’s damn effective, and his husband is an amazing pilot.” 

“True,” Ren said. “Hey, Phaz?” 

“Yeah, Ren?” 

“Thanks.” 

“For what?” 

“For caring about Hux… for helping me do all this stuff for him,” Ren said. 

“I know what it’s like to be at your lowest and not having anyone there. And I know what it’s like when you get help. He’s my friend too, even though most of the time I want to strangle him. And even if he wasn’t I wouldn’t leave him to face this alone.” 

Ren smiled. He knew Phasma couldn’t see it, so he spoke quietly and affectionately to her through the receiver. “You’re awesome, Phaz.” 

“Yes, I am,” she said. “Now, go give your boy a hug and make certain that he doesn’t feel abandoned.” 

“Will do. Bye Phasma.” Ren hung up. He laid on his bed and stared at the ceiling for about a minutes before he rolled off the bad and went to go find Hux. Phasma’s suggestion was a good one. Plus, Ren wanted to see if he could get kisses. He thought maybe Hux would put up with them just because he probably wanted Ren’s attention anyway. 

It wouldn’t be a bad way to end a night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your continued support and putting up with the long wait!
> 
> First I want to say that the news story that Hux is listening to at the beginning of the chapter is based on maybe thee most amazing fanwork anyone's ever done for me. Remington Hernandez is a real news anchor and voice actor who made a fake news audio to go with this story. He gave me permission to post it on my blog. [Listen Here](http://robinasnyder.tumblr.com/post/142076662515/). Honestly, this is so cool because it really does match up with my story in a way that is so specific to this fic. I never would have imagined this as a thing someone could/would do. 
> 
> I am also so appreciative of the people who have drawn art for my fic. I'm go and look at these pictures and giggle and grin way more than I shoulder. Links will be at the bottom. But first, I want to make an announcement. 
> 
> If you don't read my other fic, you won't have seen this. But Hollycomb and I were talking about a Dragon*Con Kylux meet up. I have someone who is helping me plan an event (as they know more about doing such things than I would). We have a tumblr page [here](http://kyluxdragoncon.tumblr.com). We're going to be putting sign-ups up for the event soon, but for now I'm just trying to tell people that this is something that exists. If you're interested, please follow us. 
> 
> And now for the fanart! 
> 
> The lovely azira-fail has drawn two pieces based on the fic [The first, including Kylo Ren in his first skirt outfit!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/139981994970/robinasnyder-azira-fail-some-high-school-au).  
> [Some Lovely Headshots](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140262018520/more-of-robinasnyders-high-school-au-bc-i-am).  
> [Said Love Headshots in color!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140313167665/buncha-teenage-losers-and-bonus-man-bun-kylo)
> 
> The lovely idleart made this super nice [piece of art of Hux and Ren](http://idleart.tumblr.com/post/140523637692/i-was-gonna-color-this-more-but-who-has-the-energy).
> 
> Also steamworkblue made this piece [here](http://steamworkblue.tumblr.com/post/140673220951/i-swear-its-not-a-phase-mom-go-read-this-it), which is inspired by the fic and discussions we've had. 
> 
> I also need to thank steamworkblue specifically for getting me the information I needed about Non-Binary and Genderqueer, which helped me with the way I'll be writing Ren from now on. 
> 
> To add to this, a reminder that Ren is a Bisexual Demiboy and Hux is Gay. Previously I said that Phasma is an Ace Lesbian, but was informed that it was more correct to say that she was Asexual Homoromantic. So from here I will refer to her as such. Please tell me if I have anything else wrong and I'll try to fix it!
> 
> Final note! 
> 
> I super, duper appreciate the fanart! I really do! but pleeeeeease tell me when you make any art work for the fic. I want to link it in the notes. I want to know about its existence. I love talking to people. My tumblr is the literal same as my AO3. Please message me a link. 
> 
> Thank you!


	11. Chapter 11

November began to give way into winter very quickly. Ren had already begun trying to figure out how to ask if Phasma and her grandparents could come with them back to Connecticut for Christmas. Mostly he wasn’t certain there was a way to do it and not also bring Phasma’s mother with them. Also, Thanksgiving was fast approaching and Ren found himself being a bit gleeful at the concept off dragging Hux to the Turkey pardoning ceremony.

Fanciful holiday plans had to be put aside when Phasma showed up somewhat unannounced Tuesday afternoon before Thanksgiving. 

“Hey,” Ren said, looking up from the stack of fashion magazines that Phasma had left with him on her last visit. She’d texted him saying she was coming over and he’d alerted the Secret Service. It was odd, but kind of nice to have friends who came over so often that the Secret Service sort of trusted them. “What’s up?” 

“Oh, only that I’ve royally pissed off your boyfriend and I figure that if he’s going to kill me I want a witness, and if he’s going to kill us both, then we’ll probably be able to fight him off together,” she said. She dropped her bag and stripped out of her coat, throwing it over the sofa. 

“What do you mean?” Ren said, standing up. He smoothed out his flowy blue skirt. He was wearing leggings underneath, but Phasma had gotten him in the habit of making certain his skirt was straight when he stood so he wouldn’t accidentally flash someone someday. 

“I got a call from one of the women at Hux’s old church. Turns out she contacted him and he’s basically furious,” Phasma said. 

“Oh… I uh, haven’t seen any signs of it,” Ren said. 

“Have you been around him any since you got home?” Phasma asked. 

“No, I mean we finished up most of the homework during that free period we got today. And you know Hux likes his privacy. I figured he’d come find me when he wanted attention.” 

“Yeah, well, I suppose it might be good to face the beast, then,” Phasma said. She held out her hand to Ren. He accepted it and allowed her to drag him down toward Hux’s room. 

As uncomfortable as it was thinking about Hux being pissed at them, Ren felt oddly cheered to realize that Phasma had been around enough that she actually knew where she was going. Every so often Ren found himself remembering that it really was nice to have friends. 

Hux’s door was open, as it almost always was unless Hux was changing. He was sitting, slumped in his computer chair, glaring at them both. Ren felt a jolt of actual fear shoot straight up his spin, and he found himself stiffening. He’d never seen Hux slump like that before. Seeing that was far more terrifying than seeing that man eating glare of his. 

“Come in. Shut the door,” Hux said calmly. 

Ren heard Phasma gulp. Good, at least he wasn’t alone in his terror. Ren ushered Phasma in and shut the door behind them. 

“Good, now we can talk in private,” Hux said. Ren had one moment where he wondered if this was Hux being like his father. A second later, Ren was pretty certain this particular type of terror-inspiring was one all of Hux’s own. 

“You know-” Ren started. 

“No, me first,” Hux said, turning his stare onto Ren completely. Ren shut up fast. “Good. Now I seem to remember that I told you both that I didn’t want you contacting my old home, didn’t I?” 

“Yes,” Phasma said. Ren suddenly considered her braver than he was. 

“And you did it anyway, didn’t you?” Hux asked. 

“Did your phone call go badly?” Phasma asked. 

“It went fine,” Hux said, gritting his teeth. “They invited me to the Winter Fair.” 

“Well, that’s good,” Ren said. 

“I don’t want to go to the Winter Fair,” Hux said. “I’m not ready to face them.” 

“Well, you don’t have to go,” Phasma said, sounding frustrated. “But now you know at least someone wants you.” 

“Dee Dee would want me there even if everyone else hated me,” Hux said. “She practically raised me.” 

“Really?” Ren asked. He hadn’t heard about this woman before. But then, Hux didn’t talk about himself that much, and definitely not about his past. 

“As she worked in the nursery, and my mother left me there for most of my childhood, yes, I’d say she raised me,” Hux said, sounding annoyed. “But that doesn’t matter because now she expects me to be there!” 

“You don’t have to go,” Ren said, even surprised by the gentleness in his own voice. Hux just sunk deeper back in the chair. 

“Yes, I do,” Hux said. “I have to or else they’ll ask me why I didn’t come, and I don’t have a good excuse.” 

“That’s what lies are for,” Phasma said. 

“But I don’t want to lie to them,” Hux mumbled. 

“We’ll go with you, if you want,” Ren said. 

“You’re damn right you will,” Hux said, suddenly sitting up perfectly straight. “I already told Dee Dee that you two would be with me.” 

Phasma groaned. “You know, that doesn’t sound interesting.” 

“Tough shit. You two dragged me into this, so you two are going to suffer through this with me. And when everything blows up you’ll have a front row seat to my total humiliation and rejection. It’s what you wanted, isn’t it? That’s why you made me do this. Well, congratulations!” 

There followed a moment of thick silence. Then Ren turned and looked at Phasma. “How about you go visit Rey.” 

“Will do,” Phasma said. She slipped out, closing the door behind her.

Ren looked at it for a moment and considered opening it. Instead he walked over to Hux. He slowly lowered himself so he was kneeling at Hux’s feet. Hux looked confused, but also more broken that Ren had seen him since he’d first moved in. 

“They’re going to hate me,” Hux said. 

“No they aren’t,” Ren said. He laid his hands on Hux’s knees. “They’re going to love you.” 

Hux snorted. He buried his face in one of his hands, as if that could let him escape how he was feeling. “Yeah, right. I don’t know if you’ve noticed this, but I’m not a very lovable guy.” 

“Don’t say that,” Ren said softly. 

“Why not?” Hux demanded. 

“Because I love you,” Ren said. “And I know they’ll love you because I love you.” 

Hux pulled his face from his hand to look at Ren. Hux stared at him for a moment before smiling so sadly. “You only love me because you’re an absolute Weirdo.” 

“Well so are you,” Ren said, feeling himself puff up a bit like an angry bird. “But that’s what makes you loveable.” 

Hux let out a weak laugh. Then he folded and wrapped his arms around Ren. Hux rested his cheek on the top of Ren’s hair, but that meant that Ren got to press his face into Hux’s shirt and breathe in the smell of Hux and detergent. It was a nice smell.

“I’m never going to understand how you can be so open like that,” Hux murmured into his head. 

“No idea,” Ren said, smiling a little bit. “But you like it.” 

“I don’t generally have to guess what you want,” Hux said. “So I suppose that’s nice.” 

Ren laughed a little a pressed his face further into Hux’s stomach. “This is going to be okay, okay?” 

Hux took a shaky breath. “Yeah, okay.”

* * *

“I told you this was better than watching my mom cook Thanksgiving dinner,” Treena said. “With camera-men around.” 

Phasma laughed and snuggled into her girlfriend. They’d escaped the family insanity downstairs to the quiet of Treena’s room. Phasma thought it was a little odd that Treena’s very conservative congressman father would allow Phasma and all her scandal over for Thanksgiving. Then she realized it was about the photo-op. Phasma’s place there was to show Treena’s father’s, George’s, constituents that he wasn’t like Senator Hux, but also show the wild child Phasma being a good girl after having made friends with his daughter. 

Different man, same games. But Phasma didn’t mind. Treena’s mother Alejandra and Phasma’s grandmother turned out to get along very well. Part of the photo-op ended up being the two women chatting while Phasma’s grandfather chopped things in the background. Turned out, her grandfather was a good enough cook that Alejandra let him assist in her kitchen. 

“Is your dad going to flip his lid when he finds out we’re dating?” Phasma asked. 

“Maybe, but I already told mama, and my aunt Sophia,” Treena said, snuggling closer into Phasma. Phasma put her arm around her girlfriend and hugged her close. Both of them were in in nice dresses for the day. Phasma’s had a loud print, and she wore high stilettos with them, and her make-up was still rock star chic. But she looked conservative for her. Treena was in a simple blue dress which looked lovely on her. 

“Good,” Phasma said. She pulled the laptop up more and hit play on the video again. It was the turkey pardoning. They’d already watched it three times, but it was funny. 

Hux had come out with Ren for the Turkey pardoning. They turkey was on the ground instead of on a pedestal like normal turkey pardonings, being petted and cooed over by Rey, who looked like she wanted the Turkey to come live with them. The President was cracking jokes, because the entire event was silly. Meanwhile, Ren was whispering something in Hux’s ear and Hux was laughing softly, his eyes on the ground. 

Then the President officially pardoned the turkey. At which point Ren smacked Hux’s ass. It was loud and had been picked up by the cameras. 

“You’re dead,” Hux said and then picked Ren right up off the ground and started to carry him off while Ren squawked like the turkey. He apparently hadn’t realized that even without the JROTC at their school having a solid physical training program, that Hux also had a father who insisted on physical fitness. Meaning Hux had no problem carrying Ren off while Ren clung to Hux for dear life. 

The video also included the President laughing completely unguarded in a way she basically never did in front of cameras, watching the ridiculous and undignified display. All the while Rey ignored the entire scene in favor of the turkey, like that type of idiocy was normal now.

Sure, people might get mad about it later. But Phasma thought it was adorable and stupid, just like the boys themselves. 

“Thank you for bringing this to my attention,” Phasma said. She’d never watched a Turkey pardoning before. 

“You’re welcome, again,” Treena said. She leaned in and kissed Phasma’s cheek, which made Phasma blush a bit. 

“God, you’re cute,” Phasma said. She rubbed her cheek and grinned. She felt so pleased being there with Treena, especially when Treena was smiling so brightly. The girl just shone like a super nova. Phasma didn’t know how she was ever going to be over that smile. 

“So are you, Babs,” Treena said. Phasma had no idea where that nickname had come from, but if that’s what Treena wanted to call her then she loved it. 

“You’re way cuter,” Phasma insisted. 

Treena laughed, but didn’t argue. “So did you children work out your differences,” she asked, motioning to the screen. She’d heard about Hux being pissed, but not the resolution. 

“Oh, yeah, about that,” Phasma started. “So, Hux told us that in order to make it up to him he wants us to go with him to the Winter Fair thing.” 

“The thing that’s next weekend?” Treena asked. 

“Yeah, and it’s in Alexanderia… Yeah, I know,” Phasma said, seeing Treena wrinkle her nose. 

“Ugh, Virginia,” Treena groaned. 

“I know,” Phasma said. “But I was wondering if you’d come with us?” 

“Why?” Treena whined. 

“Because they’re going to be gooey idiots the entire time and I don’t think I can bare it without you,” Phasma said. 

Treena groaned. “Why do you have to pull out the sap before I can make a good argument about why I shouldn’t go?” 

“Because I know it works?” Phasma asked too sweetly. 

“I hate you,” Treena said. 

“No you don’t,” Phasma teased. 

“I don’t and that’s my problem,” Treena grumbled. Phasma kissed her cheek and Treena smiled. “Okay, you won me over.” 

“Thanks, Darling,” Phasma cooed. For that Treena slapped her over the head with a pillow.

Worth it. Especially because Phasma got to hear Treena laugh, and Treena had a glorious laugh.

* * *

Hux was expecting a lot of things when the first true weekend in December rolled around. He didn’t expect the President waking them early and helping them actually pack four sack lunches. Apparently the President knew something that Hux didn’t. Hux became aware of what that something was when they arrived at the motorcade to see that Phasma had arrived with her tiny friend Treena in tow. 

“Good morning,” Treena chirped. 

Kylo grumbled and got in the car without so much as a hello. 

“It’s your fault for being up so late playing Call of Duty,” Hux said. 

“Screw you,” Kylo said from within the car. Both of the girls laughed. 

Hux sighed and carefully climbed in. He moved to sit next to Kylo. The girls climbed in and shut the door behind them. They were all bundled up for the cold weather, but once they were all inside the properly heated car, they shed layers. 

Once they were all settled Kylo tipped over so he was laying on Hux’s shoulder. “How far away is this place?” 

“Sixteen minutes, if traffic isn’t awful,” Hux said. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Kylo demanded. “The new church is just as far away.” 

“Yeah, it’s slightly closer to where I was living,” Hux said. 

“Why in the world did you have to move churches when you were so close?” Kylo demanded. 

“Because my father decided that we would,” Hux said. He ran his fingers through Ren’s hair. “Just take a nap. I’ll wake you when we get here.” 

Kylo took Hux under advisement and settled in against him. He slept with his face on Hux’s shoulder. It was slightly awkward and uncomfortable. But it made Hux’s chest feel warm too. Phasma and Treena mostly kept to themselves during the trip, so Hux could just focus on how good it felt to have Kylo. 

Maybe Kylo was only using him a pillow because he was so tired. But it felt not just like trust, but also like Kylo liked him as more than just a friend. 

The trip was uneventful. Hux shook Kylo awake when they were about to pass his Church. “Are we there?” Kylo mumbled. 

“Look,” Hux said, pointing at the big, beautiful, cathedral like building. It was squashed between a bunch of other buildings with no space in between, like a lot of other places in the city. There was only so much space. 

Kylo yawned and sat up so he could look out the window. “It’s nice,” he said. Hux shook his head. Kylo didn’t get it, but that was fine. He didn’t have to. 

“We have about five minutes before we arrive,” Hux said. 

Kylo blinked in confusion. “I thought you said we were here.” 

“This is the church, but we don’t have our own parking, so when we do an event we normally have to get space in the park,” Hux explained. 

“Oh,” Kylo said. “That’s weird.” 

“That’s what happens when you have a really old church on a really old street,” Hux said. He grabbed Kylo’s hand and gave it a squeeze. 

They watched as the world passed by for those extra five minutes. The only time that Hux had been allowed in Windmill Hill Park had been because of church event. Even now, he only had memories tied to the place for the Winter Fair. 

Hux thought about the past fairs he’d been to. People in the church would set up booths. His mother normally made knit and crocheted things for the United Methodist Women’s group to sell to help their missions effort. There would be preserves and crafts and other foods. He thought he could buy a couple of jars of preserves with the allowance the Organa-Solo family gave him. He didn’t want to spend too much, certain he’d be paying for his own schooling eventually. But he thought he could buy a few things, and maybe send some to his mother.

As long as no one got angry and threw him out. 

They were allowed out of the car and guided by the Secret Service over to where the fair was set up. The church was allowed a spot on the green, but not on particularly close to the jungle gym. Hux recognized the Secret Service around because it caused a bigger crowd than normally came. It was cold, but people were still out, and the park was already decorated for the winter months. 

“Bren! You made it!” a warm familiar voice called. Hux looked this way and that until he finally saw Dhara. 

It hadn’t even been a year since he’d seen her. She’d been one his mother’s friends, even though she was a few years younger. She’d changed her hairstyle, but he thought the box braids looked nice on her. Also, the warm orange lipstick she wore just made him feel like he was home. He broke away from Kylo and the girls and went and wrapped his arms around Dhara, who already had her arms open for him. 

“Ms Dhara, It’s good to see you,” Hux said when he stepped back. 

Dhara grinned bright and wide. “It’s good to see you too, kid. The kids have been going nuts waiting to see you.” 

“Really?” Hux asked, more than a little surprised. 

“Of course. They missed you,” Dhara said, nearly rolling her eyes. She dragged him into another hug. “I missed you too. We heard about what happened with your dad.” 

Hux deflated a bit. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. 

“Don’t be,” Dhara said in a soft but firm voice. “I know you,” she said. “You did it the way you did to protect yourself. I don’t blame you.” 

Hux blushed, a little pleased that someone actually knew him. “Um… I brought my boyfriend with me. Will that be a problem?” 

“If someone tries to make it a problem, I’ll make myself a problem for them,” she said, cracking her knuckles. Hux let out a surprised laugh. He knew he shouldn’t be surprised. The Leonis-Olett clan had always been protective of the kids at their church. But he’d just been gone from them so long that he’d begun to believe his father’s words about no good person being willing to accept a queer. 

“Thank you,” he breathed out. 

“Introduce me,” she said, nodding toward the little group he’d brought with him. 

Hux walked back over to them, expecting Dhara to follow him, and she did. “Ms Dhara, this is Kylo, my boyfriend. And my friends Phasma and Treena,” he introduced. “Everyone, this is Ms Dhara.” 

“It’s nice to meet you all,” Dhara said. “You’re all welcome. Please well free to look around. Albert made his famous meat pies. You should try and grab a few before they’ve all been eaten. Dee Dee is out getting extra ice, so make certain you stay long enough to see her.” 

“Yes Miss Dhara. Um, which one is his booth?” Hux asked. 

Dhara laughed so warmly, the same way Hux remembered. He felt embarrassed that he’d allowed his father’s words to poison the way he felt about Dhara, especially when she’d always been so sweet and kind to him, even when he’d acted like such a brat that he was certain he couldn’t deserve it. 

“Right over there, near the left end,” she said, pointing to a table. “ALBERT!” She shouted. 

“DHARA!” he shouted back, sounding amused. 

“There,” she said. 

“Thanks,” Hux said and grabbed Kylo’s hand. “Come on,” he said. 

He headed over to the table which did have a pretty big crowd around. That was fine. Hux was willing to wait, but he just hoped the food didn’t actually go away. He gave Kylo’s hand a squeeze when the crowd separated enough that they could get through. 

“It’s Baby Hux!” Albert said. 

“Four pies,” Hux said, feeling his face heat up. He could practically feel Kylo smirking next to him. 

“It’s good to see you doing alright there,” Albert said. He got four pies out. Hux paid for them and handed one to Kylo. “Who’s your friend?” 

“This is Kylo, my boyfriend,” Hux said. He felt his face get more red. Albert was a nice guy, a good baker, but really conservative. White, old, gun toting conservative Republican.

“The President’s boy,” Albert said, eyeing Kylo. 

“Yeah,” Kylo said, sounding defensive. 

“Eh,” Albert said and shrugged. “We’d heard you were living at the White House. Are you safe there?” 

“It’s the White House,” Hux said, somewhat sarcastically. 

Albert laughed. “Okay, you have a point. You boys have fun.” 

“Thank you,” Hux said. Well, it wasn’t tacit approval or anything, but it seemed like Albert was going to keep his opinions to himself anyway. 

Hux tugged Kylo away. He broke into his own pie, leaving the other two in the bag for Phasma and Treena. He took one bite of the warm, savory pie and let out a happy sound. 

“So,” Kylo said. Hux looked back at him to see that Kylo hadn’t even opened the box yet.

“You should try that while it’s still warm,” Hux said and then took another bite. They could talk when the food was gone. 

“Okay, okay,” Kylo grumbled. Hux watched him get the pie out and take a bite. Kylo’s eyes suddenly got huge and he let out a groan. Hux smirked and then looked back out at the Fair. He could see people milling around.

Treena and Phasma were at one of the craft stands. Both of them were trying on knit caps and looking at themselves in the mirror. Phasma started to laugh warmly. Treena was smiling. Hux began to feel warm in a way that had nothing to do with the warm pie filling his stomach. 

“I see what you meant about the other place being really white,” Kylo said. Hux sort of snapped back into realization of his area. He always felt uncomfortable in the other church because it was so white. His home church had so many people who were black and Hispanic and there were three Korean families. This felt right to him. He’d forgotten what it felt like to be home when he was in church. He’d forgotten what it was like to not feel uncomfortable.

“Are you glad we came?” Kylo asked. Hux looked back at him. Kylo’s pie was gone, but then so was Hux’s. There was a press of people, but there were also Secret Service on either side of them. Hux could see so many people he recognized, adults and children and youth. A couple of the youth waved at him from a booth they were manning. Hux waved back. 

“Yes,”Hux said. “Thank you for trying to take care of me.” 

“We’re friends,” Kylo reminded him. 

“I’m not certain I’d ever think to do the same for you,” Hux said quietly. He felt a little ashamed of that. He’d been fairly well wrapped up in himself for the past few weeks and he knew it. 

“Yeah you would,” Kylo said. He leaned against Hux a little bit and smiled at him. 

“I know I’ve been very focused on me recently,” Hux said. Kylo had worn only boy clothes to try and make Hux feel more comfortable about bringing his ‘boyfriend’ to a church event. “I know you’re still having problems with your family and your clothes-”

“Hux,” Kylo said, he sounded amused. He was smiling. He laid his head on Hux’s shoulder. “It’s fine, okay? A lot has happened to you. I don’t need you to do more than you have been doing. It’s fine. Maybe one day I’ll need you more. But I like being needed. I like helping you. I want to.” 

Hux relaxed little bit. “Alright,” he murmured. “Thank you… for real. I mean it. I think I did need this.” 

“Yeah, me too,” Kylo said. “Look, if you want to keep going here, or back to the other church… I’ll go with you. I mean I’m not going to start believing, but I know this is really important to you.” 

“That’s kind of a shame,” Hux said. It sort of occurred to him for the first time what could happen to Ren’s soul if he died. He didn’t actually want to think about it. “Promise me you won’t die any time soon.” 

Kylo smiled. “Yeah, totes, I promise.” 

Hux snorted, actually relieved to focus on something else. “Totes? You’re such a loser.” 

“Yeah, but I am your loser,” Kylo said. He shifted his head a bit so he could smile at Hux. Hux met him the rest of the way and kissed him. 

Kylo pulled away, blushing bright red. Hux chuckled. “You got some red on your face,” he said. 

“You kissed me,” Kylo hissed. “At a church event.” 

“Yeah, well, you deserved it,” Hux said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Thank you… for saying you’d come with me. I really do want to come back here, but I don’t want to be alone when I do it.” 

“Well, I don’t think you can get Phasma to come with us, but I’ll definitely go. I mean, they like you here. They’re important to you,” Kylo said. 

Hux’s chest felt very warm. Even as a fake boyfriend, Kylo was the best boyfriend. “Thank you,” he said again. Then he shook off the moment. “Okay, let’s buy some preserves before it all sells out. And then I want to introduce you to my friends from Youth.” Hopefully they would like Kylo. He couldn’t see why they wouldn’t like Kylo. Kylo was wonderful.

“Country bumpkin,” Kylo teased. He clasped Hux’s hand, lacing their fingers together. Hux gently squeezed Kylo’s hand.

“Yeah, when you’re groaning about how good it is, you’re going to be singing a different tune,” Hux threatened. He gave Kylo’s hand another squeeze and then dragged him back toward the tables with the preserves. They had the entire day for Hux to show Kylo around to the people he’d grown up with. He was suddenly really looking forward to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your continued support and putting up with the long wait! Good news is that I finished my Kylux Big Bang rough draft. Also, only 2 more chapters left!
> 
> So, [Jaredthemoose](http://jaredthemoose.tumblr.com) from tumblr made me a [playlist](http://8tracks.com/ultimate-trash-lord/maybe-you-re-just-my-type) for this fic! Thank you!
> 
> The news story that Hux is listening to at the beginning of the last chapter is based on maybe the most amazing fanwork anyone's ever done for me. Remington Hernandez is a real news anchor and voice actor who made a fake news audio to go with this story. He gave me permission to post it on my blog. [Listen Here](http://robinasnyder.tumblr.com/post/142076662515/). Honestly, this is so cool because it really does match up with my story in a way that is so specific to this fic. I never would have imagined this as a thing someone could/would do. 
> 
> I am also so appreciative of the people who have drawn art for my fic. I'm go and look at these pictures and giggle and grin way more than I shoulder. Links will be at the bottom. But first, I want to make an announcement. 
> 
> If you don't read my other fic, The Tower Hotel, you won't have seen this. But Hollycomb and I were talking about a Dragon*Con Kylux meet up. I have someone who is helping me plan an event (as they know more about doing such things than I would). We have a tumblr page [here](http://kyluxdragoncon.tumblr.com). We're going to be putting sign-ups up for the event soon, but for now I'm just trying to tell people that this is something that exists. If you're interested, please follow us. 
> 
> And now for the fanart! 
> 
> The lovely azira-fail has drawn two pieces based on the fic [The first, including Kylo Ren in his first skirt outfit!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/139981994970/robinasnyder-azira-fail-some-high-school-au).  
> [Some Lovely Headshots](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140262018520/more-of-robinasnyders-high-school-au-bc-i-am).  
> [Said Love Headshots in color!](http://azira-fail.tumblr.com/post/140313167665/buncha-teenage-losers-and-bonus-man-bun-kylo)
> 
> The lovely idleart made this super nice [piece of art of Hux and Ren](http://idleart.tumblr.com/post/140523637692/i-was-gonna-color-this-more-but-who-has-the-energy).
> 
> Also steamworkblue made this piece [here](http://steamworkblue.tumblr.com/post/140673220951/i-swear-its-not-a-phase-mom-go-read-this-it), which is inspired by the fic and discussions we've had. 
> 
> I also need to thank steamworkblue specifically for getting me the information I needed about Non-Binary and Genderqueer, which helped me with the way I'll be writing Ren from now on. 
> 
> To add to this, a reminder that Ren is a Bisexual Demiboy and Hux is Gay. Previously I said that Phasma is an Ace Lesbian, but was informed that it was more correct to say that she was Asexual Homoromantic. So from here I will refer to her as such. Please tell me if I have anything else wrong and I'll try to fix it!
> 
> Final note! 
> 
> I super, duper appreciate the fanart! I really do! but pleeeeeease tell me when you make any art work for the fic. I want to link it in the notes. I want to know about its existence. I love talking to people. My tumblr is the literal same as my AO3. Please message me a link. 
> 
> Thank you!

**Author's Note:**

> Title a reference to the Bowling for Soup song of the same title.


End file.
